I had the same issue and used long needle nose pliers to hold the connector and used a box wrench (before I had the gear type). It worked for me.

__________________
RRGrassi


70's Southern Pacific #5608 Fairmont A-4 MOW car

13 VW JSW 2.0 TDI 193K, Tuned with DPF and EGR Delete.

99 W210 E300 Turbo Diesel, chipped, DPF/Converter Delete. Still needs EGR Delete, 232K

90 Dodge D250 5.9 Cummins/5 speed. 400K

Gone and still missed...1982 w123 300D, 1991 w124 300D