As many of you may know, my ex-wife filed for custody of the children recently, after signing custody away to me about 20 months ago. She went as far as getting a second job, finding a 3 br apartment and moving out of her parent's house, and taking on a car payment, so that she had something to cart the kids around in.
Tuesday, the children went to the Magistrate for an in camera hearing...it's where the Magistrate asks the kids about how their life is, how their grades are, and where they want to live.
I found out this morning via email, that they said they didn't want a change, but they did want their mom to exercise her parenting time more often. In 20 months, she's only exercised her time during times where she has more than a weekend, such as Christmas, Spring, and Summer breaks. She has yet to visit them on her weekends. When I'm in Ohio, I give her as much time with them as possible.
The Magistrate also said that the kids said they'd be interested in an exchange point midway from their mom and us...she lives over 250 miles away.
Luckily, the Magistrate is a smart lady, and asked what vehicle we own, and what our MPG is. She also wants to know what their mother drives. I know that her's is a much more economical vehicle to drive, since she has a 2012 Chevy Aveo, which gets around 35+ mpg on the highway, versus my Tahoe with 17 mpg. My attorney said that she's ruled in the past with an equal amount of gas used, meaning that if she decides to order a halfway point for exchange, I should only have to drive around 70 miles to meet her, instead of 125 miles.
The Magistrate was told by their mother that she would drop everything if the kids said they didn't want a change. During the initial hearing for this, the Magistrate told my attorney "Certainly the father is filing for child support, right?" to which he replied in the affirmative. The case looks to be changing from a custody case, to a case where the only filing is for child support...which I'll be awarded without issue.
The kids have been hurt and angered through all of this. They told their mother they didn't want to move back after finding out that she filed for custody. She has not tried to see the kids, unless its for a week or so...even though she was awarded every other weekend with them. She hasn't come up for special events at the schools, or even my son's boxing bouts at the gym. She has shown no interest, unless it benefits her. She brags about the money she makes, and what she buys for herself, yet makes the kids wait a month or more for even a birthday card. They remember not having food in the house, yet their mom going out and buying the latest smartphone. They remember the carpet so loaded with filth that their feet stuck to the carpet, and their mom too lazy to get up and clean the house. They remember how they were treated as a chore, instead of an obligation. They remember how their mom loathed going to school events, refused to allow them to join sports, and wouldn't let them out of the house unless it was to go to their grandparents so she could go out barhopping. Thank God that the kids have a good memory.
When I filed for custody in 2011, I didn't ask for child support...I wasn't after money, and she didn't have it to give. I wanted to get the kids out of a bad situation...and she gave them up. I didn't have a judge rule in my favor, she gave up. I didn't have a fight in court, she gave up.
Here's to hoping that she is ordered to pay child support and to have them insured as long as it is offered by her employer. Here's to hoping that she sees the error in her ways, and actually tries to have a normal relationship with the kids, instead of trying to use them as pawns to hurt me. Here's to the kids for standing up for what they want, and against what they didn't want.
The kids have really blossomed since we got them. Their grades are stellar, with both of them pulling off A's and B's this year (with the exception of the advanced math course my son was in during the first semester), they both are involved highly in school activities and sports. Both have learned how to cook, clean, and are in the process of learning how to properly manage money. My job is to prepare these kids to become not only strong young adults, but to also prepare them to become productive members of society. My job is to also keep them as honest as possible, so that they are respected members of society.
My wife and I beam with pride when we see what the kids have accomplished is such a short time.
Yeah...this was one hell of a week. What was yours like?