Seriously . . .

1) Can I just get a beer? No, it's craft brewed, small batch . . .
2) Does everything have to be artisanal?
3) What's with the prices on BMW 2002s and coaster brake Schwinn bicycles?
4) Why is potato salad at Whole Foods $9 per pound?
5) Four guys, all wearing Fedoras, and at least two are sporting mustache wax . .