bah humbug, I may be through here
 

I may or may not be out of the driving-a-Mercedes business.

My father passed away this week. I am shattered and heartbroken. He was my buddy, the best thing that ever happened to me, the person who instilled in me my stubborn (and sometimes idiotic) DIY streak. He is the reason I drove the car I drove, my beloved 1980 300sd. He could not have been happier I drove that car, he got a real kick out of it.

I've had MB issues lately. I've had a whirring/roaring/winding up sound that I was trying to chase down by doing research here. I had the brakes done in Sept. and I really don't think it was a bearing issue. I'd pretty much come to the conclusion that it was a misaligned drive shaft. The noise came and went for a while but lately there was no 'went,' it was just predictable, starting at about 25 mph, evening out at about 60 mph and really preventing me (not sure whether it was due to my fear or to power loss) from going above 65 mph. I had, after all, had a coupling failure (NOT flex disc but at the flex disc joint) about a year ago, and had had Random Garage It Got Towed To put me back together.

I was also due for some new tie rods.

The flasher really wouldn't cooperate every time. Again, I was chasing this down and had mostly ruled out the emergency button but hadn't bought a new flasher relay.

I had been having glow plug warning light flash, but that went away when it got colder. I continue to think the temp sensor needed replacing.

I think I have a shifter bushing issue. On the drive up (RACING) to be with my father, I heard something scrape and then the shifter passed far too easily from P to N etc. I just couldn't let that matter. I would have floored it without tires. Nothing was going to slow me down.

Right before he died, my father asked me to drive his car. I am driving it, and I like it, it helps me feel close to him. I really don't know what's going to happen now. I don't want to get rid of my car, but I also didn't want to get rid of my dad and damned if **** doesn't just happen and you just have to roll with it. It wouldn't be my choice to get rid of the Mercedes, but I'm at the mercy of logistics, lawyers, loss, and the Merry Widow, who now gets to tell everyone what to do.

At any rate, I'll take my car to an indie -- it's sitting about a thousand miles away from me right now, battery disconnected -- and get some ideas about what fixes I need and whether I will do them. If anyone has diagnoses or concurs, I'd be glad to hear.

If I do have to go, I will miss you guys an incredible amount. Please -- for me -- be that sloppy jerk who is too vocal with people right now and tells them too loudly and too often that he loves them. Shower the people you love with love. Be good to your cars and your people. Life is so damn short.

Topanga, i am so sorry for your loss, most everyone goes thru this -and at this point you are reduced to the emotional level of a child. You got to get thru this and dont disguard the trusty benz just because it reminds you of him.
You will sooner that later got to get on with it and the car is the sensable choice ..

No, I'm driving his Asian sedan because it reminds me of him. And it's probably more sensible because there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. Fixing the MB and figuring out how to do so may be more than I can handle. I think I basically drove it into the ground in the past few months. I guess I am wondering if I am wrong about that.

I sure do feel at the emotional level of a child. I just want my dad.

I'm very sorry to hear about your dad, many of us have been through the experience.

Regarding the car; it sounds like you have more important thing to deal with at the moment, so why not give it a few weeks?

When you are prepared to deal with the car, bring it to a good shop and have them go through it completely and tell you what it needs. You will then have enough information to make a decision.

Sorry to hear about your dad. I agree with the previous advice. Put the Benz aside for a while. In a few months go back to it and working on it should give you good memories of your dad.

I drove my Dad's Suburban for quite a while - until it threw a rod. Having an extra car isn't a reason to get away from the MBZ. It is more likely a way to keep it and tinker it's way back to reliability.

Sorry to hear of your loss.

You have my deepest sympathy for your loss.
My geography isnt that good, but if you are within a long drive of some one like vstech or another member on here that does work on MB's, best you get your car to them.
In time, you may find that you no longer need your dads car to give you the great memories, often something small, like his key ring or his watch will be more significant to you as it can be with you always.

Larry Bible has gone through hell in recent time since his father departed, pity he is not so active on here at the moment to give some moral support that he would give so generously.

If you feel like a good rant, feel free to come and join the grumpy old diesel owners club on this forum. You will see what I mean when you read some of the posts !! :D

Good Luck & keep smiling :)

Take care, man.

It's a tough time in life right now.

I'll add your family to our prayer group.

Keep the Faith!

I so greatly appreciate your thoughts and prayers. My dad was a great man who never minded that I was a girl. He'd puzzle through car issues with me, ask my advice on computer things, and share his thoughts with me, which was a giant gift. I do have other things of his... I just am not sure what the future holds. I just won't be seeing the MB again until January, and then I'll figure out what to do. I'll share with my indie my various theories (I forgot to mention the last two times I drove it, I had to use the manual shutoff lever) and we'll see if it's worth saving. I'm pretty shaken up about my dad going and one thing I want is AIRBAGS. I feel so damn vulnerable. That's why my dad gave me his car, because we both were feeling unsafe. Though the MB is a beautiful hunk of sturdy steel, I'm, as I said, feeling vulnerable.

I feel bad for Larry Bible and indeed anyone else who has gone through this. It's so painful. I know it's normal pain, but it's deep and wide. I miss my dad.

Sorry to hear of your loss.

At the end of the day, it comes down to finances. Keeping two cars insured versus one.

If you have the finances to pay to maintain the MB immediately, Id just send it to the indy, and now you have the flexibility to use another car.

If long-term you will not be able to keep paying insurance and PM on both, then you do need to come to a decision... May be best to cut your losses and sell the MB, but recognizing that a poorer running example will be worth less.

feel free to PM me if you'd like a free checkup on your car. my location is in my post, if I'm not too far away, feel free to drop me a PM and set up an appointment to go over the car.
I REALLY feel for you, and will pray for you to have strength to get through this.
my father is aging poorly, and I really fear loosing him. he's had several major strokes, and a heart attack or two. he's 1/2 the man he was, but still has his memories and talks often of his past fun times!

take care, and seriously consider holding on to the 116, it's a rare car in rust free condition. if you do decide to sell, having it in complete fully functional condition really helps the sale.
but really, don't put the decision in your head at the moment.
keep this in mind though.

the car may not have air bags (which cause many issues as well as prevent them) but it still is a WONDERFULLY designed car that will get you safely through a head on collision due to it's crumple zone construction.
FAR and away safer than any asian car with antilock and airbags.

T,

You are in our prayers. Please always know that.

Of course, I agree with what everyone else has already said. I feel your loss - it's been 20 years since I lost my dad (almost hard to believe now that I say it - the years go by so fast) and he went way too early. I wouldn't spend any time worrying about that MB right now - put it aside and come back to it after the Earth has made another trip or two around the Sun. The pain of losing someone that special never really lessens - it just comes less often with the passage of time. Right now he is all you can think about, and that's alright. If it makes you feel better and closer to him, drive his car. Try and find comfort in your other family and friends - and in the memories you'll always share with your Dad. Despite the sadness in your heart now, be sure to focus on the happiness he brought you throughout your life, it will get you through.

Take care.

My deepest sympathy to you for your loss. Losing someone so close leaves us feeling raw and feeling so hopeless. We mourn and we manage to somehow get through it, but the occasional hurt and sadness in our heart never leaves us. Your dad would never want you to forsake the Benz, although it may remind you of him. In time, it will bring a smile full of good memories to mind. So, take heart, my friend. Keep going, even if it takes time to complete the tasks at hand. Blessings to you and your family.

Topanga, I'm very sorry for the loss of your dad. He sounds like a great guy and I can appreciate his non-descrimination philosophy when it came to discussing technical matters with you. It's one I share and I never assume any person to be knowledgeable or not so much on a particular subject just because of their sex.

I've seen some guys that are stunningly ignorant regarding mechanical things.

My father too, taught me the basis for all things mechanical, properties of materials, stresses, proper use of tools, electrical theory, etc... He also taught me to think of machines as a whole and how to understand how all the systems operate together.

Anyway, regarding the cars: I would continue to drive the "Asian sedan" for your every day car but keep the MB and honor your father's memory by learning about it, tackling one problem at a time and eventually it will be finished.

Then, you can use it for a weekend car or just something to go on a drive once in a while to have some fond memories of dad.

T -
So sorry to hear of your loss...nothing can (or should) take the place of your Dad so hold his memory tightly in your heart and remember he's laughing at you every time you get greasy under the hood...whatever car you decide on remember us back here at the "forum"

Topanga-
It is a great skill and personality trait that your Dad taught you, the desire to DIY. I agree with what I think you are feeling, that sometimes the need to DIY can be overwhelming. The others have said it to you already, try to forget about the MB for awhile and take satisfaction in driving your Dad's car.

You will understandably grieve for a long time. Eventually, you may find working on your MB enjoyable once again.

In a way, you have a gift from your Father that you will enjoy every time you use pick up a tool.

Topanga, My condolences on the loss of your Father he sounds like he was one hell of a guy ! I have 2 daughters and a son and the oldest girl love the "Cool" car that belonged to her Grandfather before me. She wants it to be her car when she learns to drive. Not the 500E, not the Porsche the 300SD. I hope she will think as well of me when I am no longer around. You do your Dad right by doing what you feel is correct because regardless of which way you go. It sounds as though he instilled some great values in you. As others here have stated take some time and if you can avoid it make a rushed decision that would be best.
Alan

I am very sorry for your loss, and understand it, since I was my dad's confidant.

However, not having an MB does not, in my opinion, prevent you from hanging out here with your buds.

Yup!, When they pry my license from my hand I will still visit this site for wit,wisdom and general tom foolery.

Topanga, I'm sorry about the loss of your father. I lost my mom 2 years ago, so I think I have an idea of the pain you are going through and even though she didn't teach me about repairing cars, she was supportive of my tasks - such as allowing me to rebuild my brake calipers on her kitchen counter.

From what you say, your father would have wanted you to definitely keep the 300sd, but not at the risk of making your life difficult - your welfare was more important. He sounds like a great guy. It sounds like you have the car temporarily stashed away for the moment and that you don't need it for transportation. So why not give yourself the time necessary to handle your current situation and then when you feel up to it, determine if you really want to hang on to the 300sd.

The noise you mentioned doesn't sound like a driveline problem. These problems usually become apparent in the form of vibrations.

I wish you well.

If all dads could keep their kids from feeling any pain ,that would be their one wish ,but this one they cant control.My deepest condoulences.

Sorry for your loss of your father, I have been having some problem's , So I got my children [3boy-1girl] love them all . Ask them what car's they wanted. Started to show them how to work on car's. My children never liked getting they hand dirty and they never help me. Know they are coming by every weekend , and I love it.I would be so happy if when I am going they fell like you. So you are making your father happy. I helped a girl who's father had died ,A friends on this forum told me she need help went and worked on her car for free it was close to my house, she was trying to keep car together 69/280se , she had wiring problem's. I am sure if you need help somone on this fourm will help. I know I would glade to help all I can.

A couple of days ago, my 15 year old daughter commented that she plans on buying an older car when she buys her own car. After riding in the W211, she basically said that it would be impossible to keep it running when it's older. I suspect that she is correct.

You guys are so nice. Thanks a lot. I am sorry to hear of all the heartbreak and difficulty. It's so sad. But, selfishly, it helps me to know I'm not the only broken heart in town, and I do know that this stuff is temporary and what lasts is strength, love, knowledge, ability, the good things.

Very perceptive that I am being overwhelmed by DIY. That is so true. I can't bear the thought of having one more task. I just can't handle it. Thanks for noticing that. I think that will change. Right now I just want to get into a car without balky glow plugs and drive in a big protective bubble to whatever it is I am going to do.

The drive train -- it IS a vibrationy thing, a whiny rubbing thing. As I was tracing it, I kept thinking it was the PS pump pr belt, just something sawing not right. It's definitely more rotationy than RPMy. Not a belt squeal, but an odd belt tension, something I could sort of feel in turns, but not quite. Tension, vibration, whine. The first time I noticed it was after the driveshaft got put back together. I feel it's that. I could be wrong. I probably am. I'm happy to not be feeling it right now.

Thanks, everyone. You're even more awesome than I thought. I really appreciate it so much.

Sorry for your loss especially the pain it brings with it.

I lost my mother this September so the feelings are fresh. I to lost all my ambition to work on anything and just recently have started to tinker again.

It makes you concentrate on what is important to you and other things seem to go by the wayside.

Give it some time and then make your decisions.
Until then drive what ever is easier. I found myself driving the wife's 4runner.
This gave me the least chance of adding more stress to the situation at the time. It was the only one I felt comfortable in.
I usually hate the thing. Go figure.

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family

Hang in there.

we are friends, all of us. some more than others, but we all lend some strength when we can. I Am so grateful to have found this site, and I show it when I can if any of can help, just ask. if you decide to let go, we are here to support, help and annoy

Very sorry for your loss.
 

I don't know how you feel but I know how I felt and it's no fun.
Keep your head up and don't try to solve the whole situation at once. Treat it like a pizza and cut it into manageable slices, then start at the small end. When you are overcome with grief your emotions are hyper-sensitive in both directions and small victories will feel good.
Step away if you have to-the Benz will wait.
Probably most importantly, grieve all you need to and know that it will get to a point where you know it's gonna be alright, you just don't know quite when. That's a good feeling. There are several stages of grief and we must pass through them all at some point. You can postpone or avoid but for true healing you must complete the cycle.
Be glad you had a good Dad and carry the positive with you. Also take comfort in knowing that many of us have been there and those that haven't probably will.