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  #1  
Old 12-27-2005, 01:12 AM
dkveuro's Avatar
Sword of Damocles
 
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A Chemical Analysis Of Women

A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS OF WOMEN

Element: Woman

Symbol: Wo

Discoverer: Adam

Atomic Mass: Accepted at 53.6Kg, but known to vary from 40-200Kg.

Occurrences: Copious quantities in all urban areas.

Physical Properties:

Surface usually covered in painted film.
Boils at nothing; freezes without reason.
Melts if given treatment.
Bitter if incorrectly used.
Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore.
Yields if pressure applied in correct places.
Chemical Properties:

1. Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones.

2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.

3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.

4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol.

5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

Common Uses:

Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
Can be a great aid to relaxation.
Very effective cleaning agent.
Tests:

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state.

2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.

Hazards:

1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.

2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other.


.

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  #2  
Old 12-27-2005, 09:14 AM
190D
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Ahhh! all men {some anyways} relish this difirence between sexes.

Women you know exsist not so to perpetuate life but to make man forget it,is why the lord give us schlongs.

This is not to be read by fairies ;-)
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  #3  
Old 12-27-2005, 10:30 PM
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Location: North Jersey
Posts: 1,310
I love it
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  #4  
Old 12-27-2005, 11:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kamil
I love it

Go ASU!








I'm only teasing.
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  #5  
Old 12-27-2005, 11:38 PM
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Location: North Jersey
Posts: 1,310
my girlfriend actually found it funnier than I did but it was still good..
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  #6  
Old 12-27-2005, 11:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kamil
my girlfriend actually found it funnier than I did but it was still good..
I don't follow sports anymore, but I'm in Phoenix for awhile and it's been all over the radio.......
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  #7  
Old 12-28-2005, 12:25 AM
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Rutgers University
 
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Location: North Jersey
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I'm pissed.....Rutgers LOST the BOWL.
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  #8  
Old 12-28-2005, 12:29 AM
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*quietly grins*



Sorry to hear that, Kamil
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  #9  
Old 12-28-2005, 12:59 AM
kamil's Avatar
Rutgers University
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 1,310
Quote:
Originally Posted by Azimyth
*quietly grins*



Sorry to hear that, Kamil
Those people must be going NUTS over there....eventhough we lost it sounds like the Super Bowl over here.
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  #10  
Old 12-28-2005, 01:00 AM
dkveuro's Avatar
Sword of Damocles
 
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Location: Here an' there.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Azimyth
*quietly grins*Sorry to hear that, Kamil
. Hijack !



.
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"A liberal is someone who feels they owe a great debt to their fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money."
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  #11  
Old 12-28-2005, 01:29 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Norman, Oklahoma
Posts: 1,184
Quote:
Originally Posted by dkveuro
A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS OF WOMEN

Element: Woman

Symbol: Wo

Discoverer: Adam

Atomic Mass: Accepted at 53.6Kg, but known to vary from 40-200Kg.

Occurrences: Copious quantities in all urban areas.

Physical Properties:

Surface usually covered in painted film.
Boils at nothing; freezes without reason.
Melts if given treatment.
Bitter if incorrectly used.
Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore.
Yields if pressure applied in correct places.
Chemical Properties:

1. Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones.

2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.

3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.

4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol.

5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

Common Uses:

Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
Can be a great aid to relaxation.
Very effective cleaning agent.
Tests:

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state.

2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.

Hazards:

1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.

2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other.


.
Amen
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  #12  
Old 12-28-2005, 05:21 AM
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Location: Littlestown PA ( 6 miles south of Gettysburg)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kamil
I'm pissed.....Rutgers LOST the BOWL.
That was a great 3/4 of a game! I am sure Rutgers attracted some favorable attention and will make more bowl appearances before another 25 years passes.
I watched the game on a friend of my son's 10' HDTV. WOW!!!
What are you studying at Rutgers?

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