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  #1  
Old 02-17-2006, 08:32 AM
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What knockers!
 
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Location: There castle.
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Cosmology

Another cut-n-paste. Hope it amuses you.

Bot

PS You don't have to read it. Really.


Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to use the bathroom.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you Were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works Every time)
Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely Proportional to the reach.
Theatre Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly Sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.
Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Wilson's Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, They will stop making it.

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An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and
no sense of responsibility at the other'
- Ronald Reagan
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  #2  
Old 02-17-2006, 09:55 AM
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This cut-n-paste is too short.
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  #3  
Old 02-17-2006, 10:09 AM
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G-Benz's Law of odds: The odds of misplacing a part is directly proportional to how critical the need.

G-Benz's Law of propulsion: The chances of a part flying off in to the nether-region is inversely proportional to its size.

G-Benz's Law of spectography: A small part of a particular color always lands in an environment of the same color.
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  #4  
Old 02-17-2006, 11:39 AM
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Thanks....

I have no problem with cut-n-paste posts. Especially if they have some value. Be it entertainment, educational or just a nifty thing to pass on.
I’ve cut-n-pasted all of these (and G-Benz’s) to a saved file for later giggles. I like’em. Thanks guys.
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  #5  
Old 02-17-2006, 11:52 AM
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Location: Usually, in the skies above you.
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Where you are is where you're at.

Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.

Reminds me of an S&R flight we made a few years back.
A guy crash landed his Cessna 172 into a semi-wooded area not to far from us. Some minor injuries onboard. He was bouncing a distress call around numerous frequencies not knowing if his radio(s) still worked or not. When we pick up on one of his calls we asked him where he was located. His reply was: “At the crash site.”

Yep. Figured that. - Here’s your sign.
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  #6  
Old 02-17-2006, 05:02 PM
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Don't forget that Mr. Murphy was an abject optimist. Reality is far worse than his Law pretends.
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  #7  
Old 02-17-2006, 05:33 PM
Ta ra ra boom de ay
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 1,915
Quote:
Originally Posted by H2O2
This cut-n-paste is too short.
No. Too long. I mean really, the 'Theatre Rule'. That one seriously wasted my time. Next time try leaving the 'Theatre Rule', and all the other ones like it, out.
Thanks.
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-Marty

1986 300E 220,000 miles+ transmission impossible
(Now waiting under a bridge in order to become one)

Reading your M103 duty cycle:
http://www.peachparts.com/shopforum/831799-post13.html
http://www.peachparts.com/shopforum/831807-post14.html
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  #8  
Old 02-17-2006, 05:35 PM
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What knockers!
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: There castle.
Posts: 40,460
Quote:
Originally Posted by A264172
No. Too long. I mean really, the 'Theatre Rule'. That one seriously wasted my time. Next time try leaving the 'Theatre Rule', and all the other ones like it, out.
Thanks.
Not to mention, "Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets:." I mean gee whiz, it went to two lines, what's up with that.

We need to ban the barstool who would do that.

B
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'Government is like a baby:
An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and
no sense of responsibility at the other'
- Ronald Reagan
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  #9  
Old 02-17-2006, 05:41 PM
Banned
 
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Location: Blue Point, NY
Posts: 25,396
Law of the parking lots:

No matter how far you park from the nearest vehicle, a $hitbox will pull in right next to you, within 18" of your door.


Law of travelling:

When travelling with women, a rest stop will be required precisely 30 minutes after the previous stop for fuel.

Second law of travelling:

Any ingestion of coffee at a rest stop will result in the need to purge said coffee when the vehicle has just passed an exit on a limited access highway..........and the next exit is 15 miles away.

Last edited by Brian Carlton; 02-17-2006 at 05:47 PM.
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  #10  
Old 02-17-2006, 05:55 PM
Ta ra ra boom de ay
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 1,915
Quote:
Originally Posted by Botnst
Not to mention, "Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets:." I mean gee whiz, it went to two lines, what's up with that.

We need to ban the barstool who would do that.

B
Now that you mention it, I see what you mean. Not only is that one long it's patently untrue.

As to banning... I Think there's an automatic ban at 11,001 posts so that issue will resolve itself.
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-Marty

1986 300E 220,000 miles+ transmission impossible
(Now waiting under a bridge in order to become one)

Reading your M103 duty cycle:
http://www.peachparts.com/shopforum/831799-post13.html
http://www.peachparts.com/shopforum/831807-post14.html
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  #11  
Old 02-17-2006, 06:00 PM
Botnst's Avatar
What knockers!
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: There castle.
Posts: 40,460
Quote:
Originally Posted by A264172
Now that you mention it, I see what you mean. Not only is that one long it's patently untrue.

As to banning... I Think there's an automatic ban at 11,001 posts so that issue will resolve itself.

I think that's a good idea. I might try self immolation like Bard ii, Spock and Spock ii, KV (and subsequent echoes), and Narwhal.

It's better to burn-out than fade away!
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'Government is like a baby:
An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and
no sense of responsibility at the other'
- Ronald Reagan
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  #12  
Old 02-17-2006, 06:07 PM
Ta ra ra boom de ay
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 1,915
Quote:
Originally Posted by Botnst
I think that's a good idea. I might try self immolation like Bard ii, Spock and Spock ii, KV (and subsequent echoes), and Narwhal.

It's better to burn-out than fade away!
I've been thinking, that if I ever got rid of my current 300E WDBEA3OD6GA264172 I would have a real identity crisis on my hands. So for now I'll just keep her up and running to the best of my skills and resources.
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-Marty

1986 300E 220,000 miles+ transmission impossible
(Now waiting under a bridge in order to become one)

Reading your M103 duty cycle:
http://www.peachparts.com/shopforum/831799-post13.html
http://www.peachparts.com/shopforum/831807-post14.html
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  #13  
Old 02-17-2006, 09:35 PM
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That cut-n-paste is too long, and not very interesting.
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  #14  
Old 02-17-2006, 11:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 123c
Law of long lines: When you're in a hurry at the grocery store, no matter which line your in, it's always the longest
Hehe!! I go to the Dollar Store cause it ain't as crowded as Wal-Mart. I get in the checkout that only has three people in front of me while the other has six. We're moving right along ....... until the woman in front of me pulls out 33 coupons, a debit card that the scanner will not read and 12 items that need a 'price check'!!!

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