It's a holiday week, so I gave the parents a break and called a morning practice for my little league team (11-12 year olds). Figured if nothing else, it's something for the kids to do instead of video games. Took off from work, handled the practice myself since the other coaches had to work, and took 3 kids back to my house afterwards to wait until someone could pick them up.

After the kids left my house, I spent an hour cleaning the branches, broken bottle and rocks out of my driveway, because 2 of the kids decided that was a fun thing to do.

BTW, both of those sets of parents aren't home - the kids are returning to empty houses.

If I tell the parents, kid #1, the bottle thrower, will get the crap beat out of him by dad, a cop.

Kid #2 will tell dad he didn't do it, and dad will believe him and tell me I'm mistaken.

I know these 2 kids pretty well - I've coached them for 3 out of the last 4 years.


Fortunately, my son seems to know better (but not enough to tell me about this before the kids left, so I could make them clean up.)


Dilemma - since I don't want to have #1 beat up (which won't do anything), and don't want to waste my breath on dad of #2, I'm going to have to come up with something else.

I enjoy coaching.... Unfortunately it's a small number of kids (and parents) who ruin it.

Hats off to you for under taking such a task. Next time tell the bottle cruncher if he does it again he'll eat it for dinner....this is the second " Good for nothings kids" thread this week.

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"It's normal for these things to empty your wallet and break your heart in the process."
2012 SLK 350
1987 420 SEL

The simple thing could be this...

Next practice, find a "chore" (practice-related) that all three (yep, your son too...) that they have to perform for that particular practice...only talk to the three kids privately...

Bottle-cruncher, "enabled-one" and your son...all have to do something for the good of the team (even though it was your place that got trashed...)

The bottle-cruncher and the "enabled-one" will see and wonder why your son is being "disciplined" - and you can point out that he didn't "narc" on the rest of them while it was going on...that way, he'll be "one of them" and not get labled as the "coach's kid" and he'll learn that he needs to take on a better leadership roll in helping control situations BEFORE they get out of hand.

Since he's under your roof, you can let your son know what's going to happen beforehand...but make sure that only those 3 kids are in on what the punishment is and when it's happening...the rest of the team doesn't really need to know and you won't be embarrassing anyone unduly.

Besides...kids talk and they'll find out what's going on anyways...but you'll be looked up to 'cause you didn't berate any one kid over another or in front of the others...

Good luck w/the yungons!

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M. G. Burg
'10 - Dakota SXT - Daily Ride / ≈ 172.5K
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....'75 - Yamaha - 650XS / < 21.00 K
.....'87 - G20 Sportvan / > 206.00 K
......'85 - 4WINNS 160 I.O. / 140hp
.......'74 - Honda CT70 / Real 125
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“I didn’t really say everything I said.”
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ~ Yogi Berra ~

Swirly's, worked for my kid problem.

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1999 SL500
1969 280SE
2023 Ram 1500
2007 Tiara 3200

As I thought about this, it is sort of a metaphor for something about our society ...

MGB - BTW, excellent suggestion. I think I'm going to do it. Thanks

I'll second the "punishment at next practice" idea. Have them run laps until they're ready to throw up. If they don't, then they're benched at the next game. Kid #1 wont complain to his dad, because if he does then you have to tell dad the whole story and he gets a beating. Kid #2 might tell his dad, but then you could always reply that he was "mistaken" about the reason that he was running laps - it had to be something game related.

Kids remember consequences. Especially when those consequences take place in front of a group of their teammates.

edit: I agree with Mistress, too. Good on ya for being a coach and getting involved in your community. A lesser man (like me, for example) wouldn't have any part of the hassle you just described.

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Jonathan

2011 Mazda2
2000 E320 4Matic Wagon
1994 C280 (retired)

I think conference with both parents, with each kid giving their side of the story. Then decide on punishment under your supervision with both parents agreeing.

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You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows - Robert A. Zimmerman

An interesting part of this story is that the miscreants were both going back to VERY large, EMPTY houses. (They are not "wrong side of the tracks" kids, as are some of my coaching projects.)

My son and his friend who was also here (both of whom who did not participate in the rock-, bottle- and branch-throwing), both have at least 1 stay-at-home parent.

I'm not a big believer in coincidences.



I think I have a chance to do the right thing here if I can figure out what it is. I still like MGB's suggestion.

Thank you all for the kind words, BTW.

I coach because my kid still appreciates it. I'm guessing I've got another year at the most before I'm embarassing him (if I'm not already.)

Lay the blame on whom it belongs. Confront the 2 kids, tell them you didn't appreciate the mess they made and they are not welcomed back to your home. Tell them that if they behave like that at any time again on the field, their off the team. Other than that, forget it.

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Question Authority before it Questions you.

hell a parent can't do much anymore but give the kid a time out. what ever happened to spare the rod spoil the child? sounds like the kind of kid who would kill his parents and ask the court to be lenient as he's an orphan?