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  #1  
Old 07-26-2008, 09:49 PM
Larry Delor's Avatar
What, Me Worry?
 
Join Date: Jun 1999
Location: Sarasota, Fl.
Posts: 3,114
Limerick thread

I'll start

There's a tavern in London that's staffed,
By a barmaid who's tops at her craft:
In her striving to please,
She serves ale on her knees,
So the patrons get head with their draft.

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09 Jetta TDI
1985 300D
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  #2  
Old 07-26-2008, 10:04 PM
WVOtoGO's Avatar
Up & Over
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Usually, in the skies above you.
Posts: 151
There once was a gal from Batas.
Who had a real fine ass.

Not round and pink.
As most men would think.

But large ears. A tail. And ate grass.
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  #3  
Old 07-26-2008, 10:15 PM
R Leo's Avatar
Stella!
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: En te l'eau Rant
Posts: 5,393
The king named Oedipus Rex
Who started this fuss about sex
Put the world to great pains
By the spots and the stains
Which he made on his mother's pubex.
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  #4  
Old 07-26-2008, 10:54 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: North central Texas
Posts: 2,596
There once was a man from Boston
Who drove here in a small Austin
There was room for his a$$
and a gallon of gas
But his balls fell out and he lost 'em
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  #5  
Old 07-26-2008, 10:59 PM
Wodnek's Avatar
Vintage Mercedes Junkie
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Southeast Wisconsin
Posts: 1,661
There was a young girl from Racine
Who washed out her c@#t with benzine
she lit up a match
to see her snatch
and thats the last she was seen.
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  #6  
Old 07-27-2008, 12:13 AM
OldPokey's Avatar
0-60 in 10 minutes flat
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Middletown MD
Posts: 527
I sat by the duchess at tea,
and it was just as I thought it would be
Her rumblings abdominal were simply phenomenal.
And everyone thought it was me.
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  #7  
Old 07-27-2008, 12:29 AM
Redefining normal daily
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Frederick, MD
Posts: 445
There once was a liberated Ms.
Who thought herself a social Ws.
She had an invention
With equalizing intention
A method for standing to Ps.
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1961 220b: first project car - sold.
2000 CLK 430: first modern Benz - sold.
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1972 280SE 4.5: Baby Gustav
1991 300TE 4Matic: Gretel the Snow Bunny - sold
1978 300SD: Katz the Free Man - given away
1980 Redhead: Darling Wife
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  #8  
Old 07-27-2008, 08:20 AM
G-Benz's Avatar
Razorback Soccer Dad
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Dallas/Fort-Worth
Posts: 5,711
There once was a girl named Jill
who used dynamite sticks for a thrill
They found her v@gina
in North Carolina
and bits of her t!ts in Brazil
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  #9  
Old 07-27-2008, 08:38 AM
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: North Wales, PA
Posts: 4,001
A Decrepit old gasman named Peter,
while hunting around his gas heater,
touched a leak with his light.
He rose out of sight –
And, as everyone who knows anything about
poetry can tell you, he also ruined his meter.
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"Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work." - Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)

SOLD
1985 300TD - Red Dragon
1986 300SDL - Coda
1991 - 300TE
1995 - E320
1985 300CD - Gladys
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  #10  
Old 07-27-2008, 09:31 AM
fz500sel's Avatar
Happy now in paradise!
 
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: Venice, FL - "sharktooth capital of the world"
Posts: 712
There once was a boy named Mickey,
who liked to rub on his dickey
his dad told him to stop
but who listens to pop
now his hands are all stickey
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  #11  
Old 07-28-2008, 07:44 AM
865sp300e's Avatar
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Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Yardley, PA
Posts: 318
There was a young lady from Seattle
whose hobby was sucking off cattle
but a bull from the south
left a wad in her mouth
that made both her ovaries rattle
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  #12  
Old 07-28-2008, 07:54 AM
865sp300e's Avatar
Talent Scout
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Yardley, PA
Posts: 318
Abuses of the Clergy...

There were three youing ladies from Birmingham,
And this is the scandal concerning 'em.
They lifted the frock
And tickled the cock
Of the Bishop engaged in confirming 'em.

Now, the bishop was nobody's fool,
He'd been to a good public school,
So he took down their britches
And buggered those *****es
With his ten-inch episcopal tool.

The up spoke a lady from Kew,
And said, as the Bishop withdrew,
"The vicar is quicker
And thicker and slicker,
And longer and stronger than you."
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  #13  
Old 07-28-2008, 08:29 AM
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Location: Location: Greenfield WI, USA
Posts: 8,514
Oh she looked so fine in the midnight air
when the wind blew up her nightie
Her t1ts were hung like the balls of a bear
and he said Jesus Christ almighty
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  #14  
Old 07-28-2008, 08:46 AM
Carleton Hughes's Avatar
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 1,611
Quote:
Originally Posted by aklim View Post
Oh she looked so fine in the midnight air
when the wind blew up her nightie
Her t1ts were hung like the balls of a bear
and he said Jesus Christ almighty
Doubless a regional variation of the old Choate rhyme..

Creepin'Jeeziz,Christ almighty.
A F*ckin'mouse crawled up my nightie...

He bit my tit and took a *****,
Creepin'Jeeziz,Christ almighty.
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  #15  
Old 07-28-2008, 10:48 AM
Geezer
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Holland, MI
Posts: 1,316
There was a young lad from Kent
with manhood so long that it bent.
To avoid any trouble
he put in in double
but instead of coming, he went.

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