Parts Catalog Accessories Catalog How To Articles Tech Forums
Call Pelican Parts at 888-280-7799
Shopping Cart Cart | Project List | Order Status | Help



Go Back   PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum > General Discussions > Off-Topic Discussion

View Poll Results: Chuck Norris
Is the greatest man to have ever lived 2 11.11%
Is not a man, it is a force of nature 8 44.44%
doesn’t eat. Rather he kicks ass until he’s full. 1 5.56%
never “gets laid”, rather: “laid gets Chuck” 3 16.67%
doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead 6 33.33%
oes not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror. 2 11.11%
is Luke Skywalker’s real father 0 0%
invented water, but is not comprised of it 0 0%
doesn’t need to swallow when eating food 1 5.56%
Soylent Green is made out of Chuck Norris. Or is it the other way around??? 2 11.11%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 18. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 09-06-2010, 12:35 AM
Sev's Avatar
Sev Sev is offline
Infractions: 99/99 (999)
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,461
~!OFFICIAL!~ CHUCK NORRIS FACT THREAD - POST FACTS RIGHT HERE!

-The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably

-If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

-Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris

-Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own

-Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris

-Chuck Norris has never blinked in his entire life. Never.

-Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

__________________
i know Jim Smith. i don't actually know him, but I know of him
http://imageshack.com/a/img923/6201/RQ1H6A.jpg
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 09-06-2010, 08:25 AM
dannym's Avatar
I'm not here
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Deltona, Florida
Posts: 2,360
I always got a kick from Chuck Norris quotes.

To Chuck Norris, a zombie apocalypse is just a bonus round.

Chuck Norris doesn't play dead for bears, bears play dead for Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris is the only man who can stab you with a basketball

Hitler didn't kill himself because they were losing the war. He killed himself because Chuck Norris joined the army


Chuck Norris doesn't have Twitter, because he's already following you.

Chuck Norris hates both the player and the game.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle

Chuck Norris CAN finish reading the "The Never Ending Story".

Chuck Norris once practiced roundhouse kicks for an entire day...the area where he practiced is now called Tornado Alley.

Chuck Norris' glare is so tough, you go blind from staring back

MAN (man) noun: 1. Chuck Norris 2. no one else

Only 3 things are certain in this world. Taxes, Death, and Chuck Norris.
__________________
1984 300SD Turbo Diesel 150,000 miles

OBK member #23

(\__/)
(='.'=) This is Bunny. Copy and paste bunny into your
(")_(") signature to help him gain world domination
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 09-06-2010, 09:20 AM
LUVMBDiesels's Avatar
Dead on balls accurate...
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Red Lion,Pa
Posts: 2,207
Guns don't kill people, Chuck Norris Kills people!

Up in the sky! It's a bird, It's a plane, No it's Superman and Chuck Norris is up there kicking his @ss!
__________________
"I have no convictions ... I blow with the wind, and the prevailing wind happens to be from Vichy"

Current
Monika '74 450 SL
BrownHilda '79 280SL
FoxyCleopatra '99 Chevy Suburban
Scarlett 2014 Jeep Cherokee
Krystal 2004 Volvo S60
Gone
'74 Jeep CJ5
'97 Jeep ZJ Laredo
Rudolf ‘86 300SDL
Bruno '81 300SD
Fritzi '84 BMW
'92 Subaru
'96 Impala SS
'71 Buick GS conv
'67 GTO conv
'63 Corvair conv
'57 Nomad
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 09-06-2010, 10:17 AM
Inna-propriate-da-vida
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,895
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars, that's why there is no sign of life.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a condom, because there is no protection from Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals that Chuck Norris allows to live
__________________
On some nights I still believe that a car with the fuel gauge on empty can run about fifty more miles if you have the right music very loud on the radio. - HST

1983 300SD - 305000
1984 Toyota Landcruiser - 190000
1994 GMC Jimmy - 203000

https://media.giphy.com/media/X3nnss8PAj5aU/giphy.gif
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 09-06-2010, 10:38 AM
The Clk Man's Avatar
Saved By Grace
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Heaven Bound
Posts: 123
I think that Chuck Norris kicked the universe into existence.
__________________
For the Saved, this world is the worst it will ever get.
For the unSaved, this world is the best it will ever get.

Clk's Ebay Stuff BUY SOMETHING NOW!!!
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 09-06-2010, 10:56 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 7,334
Chuck Norris wears plastic cowboys hats and secretly bats for the other team.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 09-06-2010, 10:59 AM
The Clk Man's Avatar
Saved By Grace
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Heaven Bound
Posts: 123
Quote:
Originally Posted by MTUpower View Post
Chuck Norris wears plastic cowboys hats and secretly bats for the other team.
How is it that you know that?? do you bat for the other team also?
__________________
For the Saved, this world is the worst it will ever get.
For the unSaved, this world is the best it will ever get.

Clk's Ebay Stuff BUY SOMETHING NOW!!!
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 09-06-2010, 11:30 AM
chilcutt's Avatar
Anywhere I Roam
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Singapore
Posts: 7,562
Quote:
Originally Posted by MTUpower View Post
Chuck Norris wears plastic cowboys hats and secretly bats for the other team.
I am with you on this one. Personally, I would select John Wayne over any of these modern day action heros. Norris, Segal, Stalone, would be no match for 'The Duke' in his prime.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 09-06-2010, 11:45 AM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 7,334
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Clk Man View Post
How is it that you know that?? do you bat for the other team also?
I "know" that because so many men just oogle over him (this whole thread is another "oogle" session) and think he is "everything", and he does infomercials. Yul Brenner was tougher than Chuck, as were and are many people.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 09-06-2010, 11:47 AM
retmil46's Avatar
Registered User
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Mooresville, NC
Posts: 344
Quote:
Originally Posted by chilcutt View Post
I am with you on this one. Personally, I would select John Wayne over any of these modern day action heros. Norris, Segal, Stalone, would be no match for 'The Duke' in his prime.
Might be something to that.

"If you can't learn to respect your elders, you're gonna learn to respect your betters" - Duke's line prior to whupping one of his movie-offsprings rears.
__________________
Just say "NO" to Ethanol - Drive Diesel

Mitchell Oates
Mooresville, NC
'87 300D 212K miles
'87 300D 151K miles - R.I.P. 12/08
'05 Jeep Liberty CRD 67K miles
Grumpy Old Diesel Owners Club
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 09-06-2010, 01:06 PM
tbomachines's Avatar
ಠ_ಠ
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 6,194
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Clk Man View Post
I think that Chuck Norris kicked the universe into existence.
According to mathematics, that indicates that Chuck Norris ALSO resides within the 11th dimension. I'm not really all that surprised actuallym pretty badass
__________________
TC
Current stable:
- 2004 Mazda RALLYWANKEL
- 2007 Saturn sky redline
- 2004 Explorer...under surgery.

Past: 135i, GTI, 300E, 300SD, 300SD, Stealth
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 09-06-2010, 01:22 PM
The Clk Man's Avatar
Saved By Grace
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Heaven Bound
Posts: 123
Quote:
Originally Posted by tbomachines View Post
According to mathematics, that indicates that Chuck Norris ALSO resides within the 11th dimension. I'm not really all that surprised actuallym pretty badass
Yeah, tell me about it.
__________________
For the Saved, this world is the worst it will ever get.
For the unSaved, this world is the best it will ever get.

Clk's Ebay Stuff BUY SOMETHING NOW!!!
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 09-06-2010, 01:28 PM
Sev's Avatar
Sev Sev is offline
Infractions: 99/99 (999)
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,461
Quote:
Originally Posted by dannym View Post
I always got a kick from Chuck Norris quotes.
That's not possible. No man lives to tell the tale of receiving a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris, or even from his quotes.

Roundhouse kicks from Chuck Norris quotes are fatal in and of themselves
__________________
i know Jim Smith. i don't actually know him, but I know of him
http://imageshack.com/a/img923/6201/RQ1H6A.jpg
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 09-06-2010, 01:32 PM
Sev's Avatar
Sev Sev is offline
Infractions: 99/99 (999)
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,461
Quote:
Originally Posted by MTUpower View Post
Yul Brenner was tougher than Chuck, as were and are many people.
Yul may have been tougher than some guy named Chuck, but not Chuck Norris.

No one is tougher than Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris IS what it means to be tough. The concept of toughness came about only after Chuck Norris was born. Chuck Norris wasn't technicaly born--he has always existed.
__________________
i know Jim Smith. i don't actually know him, but I know of him
http://imageshack.com/a/img923/6201/RQ1H6A.jpg
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 09-06-2010, 01:36 PM
The Clk Man's Avatar
Saved By Grace
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Heaven Bound
Posts: 123
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sev View Post
That's not possible. No man lives to tell the tale of receiving a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris, or even from his quotes.

Roundhouse kicks from Chuck Norris quotes are fatal in and of themselves

__________________
For the Saved, this world is the worst it will ever get.
For the unSaved, this world is the best it will ever get.

Clk's Ebay Stuff BUY SOMETHING NOW!!!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On




All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:43 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0
Copyright 2018 Pelican Parts, LLC - Posts may be archived for display on the Peach Parts or Pelican Parts Website -    DMCA Registered Agent Contact Page