In my 61 years on Earth, this is the first Thanksgiving since I was in the Army when my Dad wasn't present. We brought him home from the Alzheimers wing last Thanksgiving and then we lost him in February.

I'm not at all into protocol. I always thought the head of the table was kind of silly in a home setting or business setting either one, but my Mom made it CLEAR that as the eldest son I was to sit at the head of the table. It was very strange.

If you're Dad is still living, don't pass up ANY possible opportunities to spend time with him.

unfortunatly I lost my dad when I was about 5, Slightly before kindergarten so he's been gone a long time I am sorry for your loss

__________________
hum.....
1987 300TD 311,000M Stolen. Presumed destroyed

Thanks, but it sounds as if your loss was much more severe than mine. I can't imagine growing up without the advice and the "counseling" that I got from my Dad.

I hope that there will be some here that end up spending a little more time with their Dad after hearing from you.

I lost my Dad when I was in my forties. I didn't think I would miss him as much as I do.
Sorry for your loss.

__________________
1982 300SD " Wotan" ..On the road as of Jan 8, 2007 with Historic Tags

My Godfather was laid to rest in Omaha, NE on Weds. last, Nov. 17th. He was 85 years old, and a proud Navy veteran of WW II. Benson VFW Post in Omaha, presented full Military honors funeral - as the post did for my Mother and Father in years past, as they were also WW II veterans. My Godfather was my Dad's best friend. He said so on many occasions. My Godfather was afflicted from Alzheimer's disease for 5 years before he passed. I dropped in on my Godfather Buzz, and my Godmother Mary, three years ago at their home in Omaha. Buzz was a spry, alert, and friendly 82 year old, and said repeatedly; "you look like a nice guy, but I don't know who you are?" His wife Mary, knowingly looked at Buzz and I just nodding. The three of us sat visiting lightly for the better part of an hour, spending a little time talking about the picture of Buzz and his shipmates in the Navy, taken in 1945 after their tours in the South Pacific, before being mustered out of active duty in WW II.

After our living room visit, Buzz walked with me out to the mailbox a distance from the house to retrieve the afternoon newspaper. Retrieving the newspaper was an afternoon routine that his wife, Mary sent him on. As I climbed the stairs into my diesel travelling coach, I paused at the bottom of the stairwell, coach door wide open looking back to the mailbox, mainly to keep an eye on Buzz to be sure he didn't wander off. What I remember most about watching Buzz walk the 40 yards or so back to the house, was how he would walk a little ways, stop, then turn to stare in the direction of my coach - probably wondering; "who was that guy." to himself? I am getting used to realizing in the past 30 years or so, when I may be in the midst of a life changing and memorable event that will never come again. As a man of 56, I realized that what once was, could never be again. The emotions of visiting with Buzz that day are close to the surface anytime I remember them. The previous 50 years of occasionally seeing Buzz, his wife and my Mom and Dad on inumerable occasions all bubbles back in my mind. Life at times seems cruel, yet, intellectually, I know it must go forward in time - me along with it.....

I think today, Larry, you were in one such a place.

I lost my dad when I was in my 30s, there are times I would really appreciate him being around. It's been decades since I had a holiday dinner with the whole extended family, we are all spread out too much.

I lost my father five years ago at the age of 91, he was alert and energetic for his age until the afternoon he died in his sleep while taking a nap and watching the ball game.

A good way to go.

__________________
Strelnik
Invest in America: Buy a Congressman!

1950 170SD
1951 Citroen 11BN
1953 Citroen 11BNF limo
1953 220a project
1959 180D
1960 190D
1960 Borgward Isabella TS 2dr
1983 240D daily driver
1983 380SL
1990 350SDL daily driver alt
3 x Citroen DS21M, down from 5
3 x Citroen 2CV, down from 6

During my 34th year of life, I realized I'd passed the age my father was when he died. I wish I could say it had some profound effect on me and that I grew from it, but all that could happen already had in the 20+ years since his death.

I am blessed that my uncle was there as a terrific role model through the tough teen years and that my mom was strong enough for -- well, everything...and particularly that she's still around and I can love on her and appreciate her (which is the heart of Larry's message as I read it).

One thing is for sure: if you live long enough, tragedy and heartache will surface in your life, and no matter what, you can't really "prepare" for them or know how you'll deal with them. Don't expect that you'll respond as you imagine you might, and don't beat on yourself when you don't. Rather, live each day to be the best you can. If someone is important to you, be sure they know it, whether through word or deed.

The worst place you will ever find yourself is standing alone on the dock, staring into the tendrils of fog that drift over you with no sympathy whatsoever, and wishing you could take back something you said or did, or wishing you could say what you didn't to someone you cared about, and that opportunity is lost because they have slipped the moorings of this life.

Time can be a cruel master. Try to live so as to lessen its harshness.

Amen to that. I miss him every day.

__________________
1985 380SE Blue/Blue - 230,000 miles
2012 Subaru Forester 5-speed
2005 Toyota Sienna
2004 Chrysler Sebring convertible
1999 Toyota Tacoma

I lost my Father in 1994 and almost lost my wife this year, so I feel your pain Mr. Larry.

__________________
For the Saved, this world is the worst it will ever get.
For the unSaved, this world is the best it will ever get.

Clk's Ebay Stuff BUY SOMETHING NOW!!!

I lost my dad about five years ago. He had cancer but blessedly did not die from that but from liver (or kidney) failure from the tumor pressing on it, so he suffered less. He had not been himself for a couple of years and had suffered plenty the last year so I felt at peace with him leaving us.

I had a really great relationship with Dad and so have no unfinished business in that respect.

I thought I would be fine and basically am but often find myself missing him...more than I ever suspected I would.

Embrace your loved ones and don't ever let petty things come between you. Life is short.

__________________
[SIGPIC] Diesel loving autocrossing grandpa Architect. 08 Dodge 3/4 ton with Cummins & six speed; I have had about 35 benzes. I have a 39 Studebaker Coupe Express pickup in which I have had installed a 617 turbo and a five speed manual.[SIGPIC]

..I also have a 427 Cobra replica with an aluminum chassis.

My dad retired after a 30 yr. career in the military in 1972. He passed away in 1992. So, he beat the odds living so long after retirement.
After he died, my mother would have me sit at the other end of the table, being the oldest son. It has been customary through the generations in my family that the father and mother sit at opposite ends of the table.

Dad & I were not particularly close. No particular reason for that, except he wasn't around that much and left the child rearing to my strong willed mother. Our personalities were similar. Quiet and close-lipped.
Then after teen years and college, you pretty much go you separate ways.
I always felt this song summed up our relationship.


And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home dad?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=un2EfjEJAOA

Enjoy your mother. You'll be at the top of the tree soon enough.

I also assumed the table head at this years Thanksgiving. Last year I missed the family thanksgiving as I was still in the hospital fighting endocarditis (viral heart infection). We lost Dad Jan 2 this year and it was and still is a staggering loss to my family.

I get to sit at the head of the table now if one of my six strong willed sisters or my brother does not beat me to it!

__________________
[SIGPIC] Diesel loving autocrossing grandpa Architect. 08 Dodge 3/4 ton with Cummins & six speed; I have had about 35 benzes. I have a 39 Studebaker Coupe Express pickup in which I have had installed a 617 turbo and a five speed manual.[SIGPIC]

..I also have a 427 Cobra replica with an aluminum chassis.

everything changes when your father dies--he's like the rock in your life

__________________