Marriage choices - PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum

Botnst · #1 01-15-2014, 09:15 PM

Three friends married women from different parts of the country. The first man married a woman from the North. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from the West. He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done, and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from the Louisiana. He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when he pees.

The Clk Man · #2 01-15-2014, 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Botnst

Three friends married women from different parts of the country. The first man married a woman from the North. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from the West. He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done, and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from the Louisiana. He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when he pees.

It's the same in Korntucky but it takes 5-7 days because they wear steel toed boots.

barry12345 · #3 01-15-2014, 09:53 PM

Different universe. You try telling them what to do this far north in Canada. I cannot even project the likely outcome. I just would not want the damage to be laid on me,

It was bad enough when I once suggested that my wife might be in difficulty if she had reached the end of her knowledge in a given area. Took a couple of interesting days for that one to pass.

JB3 · #4 01-15-2014, 09:58 PM

Lol, pretty good one

The person who wrote that joke doesn't realize how much northern, western, and southern women have in common.

I suppose where their fist lands on your body might change by region, but id consider getting hit a universal reaction

Botnst · #5 01-15-2014, 10:46 PM

Yeah, clearly it's generic enough that it could be adapted for any place.

But I got it on PP first, so I own it!

cmac2012 · #6 01-16-2014, 02:54 AM

Good one.

A southern guy is gaining a few pounds, well, more like several, or a few dozen, and gets concerned enough to do some reading on the subject. He tells his wife, "It's carbohydrates what are the problem, says here I got to quit eating them. OK, that's it, I'm through, I'm done. No more reading for me."

Stretch · #7 01-16-2014, 03:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Botnst

Yeah, clearly it's generic enough that it could be adapted for any place.

But I got it on PP first, so I own it!

You da man!

Botnst · #8 01-16-2014, 07:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cmac2012

Good one.

A southern guy is gaining a few pounds, well, more like several, or a few dozen, and gets concerned enough to do some reading on the subject. He tells his wife, "It's carbohydrates what are the problem, says here I got to quit eating them. OK, that's it, I'm through, I'm done. No more reading for me."

There's an unfortunate grain of truth in that one.

Air&Road · #9 01-16-2014, 07:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Botnst

Three friends married women from different parts of the country. The first man married a woman from the North. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from the West. He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done, and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from the Louisiana. He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when he pees.

pj67coll · #10 01-16-2014, 09:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barry12345

Different universe. You try telling them what to do this far north in Canada. I cannot even project the likely outcome. I just would not want the damage to be laid on me,

A redhead I once knew used to say the quickest way to a mans heart was thru his ribcage with a carving knife.

- Peter.

aklim · #11 01-16-2014, 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pj67coll

A redhead I once knew used to say the quickest way to a mans heart was thru his ribcage with a carving knife.

- Peter.

Messy though. A more effective way is thru the zipper

Jim B. · #12 01-16-2014, 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pj67coll

A redhead I once knew used to say the quickest way to a mans heart was thru his ribcage with a carving knife.

- Peter.

My ex (wifey) told me that she was related to Lorena Bobbitt.

And she added that she had a blender. (The Cuisinart on top of the refrigerator was a wedding gift in fact.)

I escaped intact.

The end.

NEXT!