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  #1  
Old 07-30-2018, 11:36 AM
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If you could ask your animals some questions?

I have a few I would like answers to.

For my dog.
- what is it that you are looking for when you are trying to find the ideal spot to crap? You have been doing this in the same yard for over 4 years now and nothing has changed. When you do finally find what ever it is that you are looking for, why do you walk around in circles 5, 10 or more times before you finally hone in and drop your load? Same for lying down, Why turn around 3 or 4 times? Now, speaking of turds. What on earth is so appealing about cat turds that makes you lick your lips with anticipation? You and I take walks all the time. When I get the leash out, why do you just lose your ever loving mind ... every .... single. .... time. It used to be cute ... the first 1000 times ... now .... jees louise.... just calm the hell down and let me put the leash on. Now, when I come home from work after 8 hrs, why do you act like I have not seen you in weeks or months? There are clocks all over the house. I know you can tell time because you know when it is time to wake up, when it's time to eat, bed time....so stop acting like I have not seen you in an eternity. One last thing, thanks for not eating any of our cats and for being so tolerant of our new kitten. I know she is a PIA but so were you when you were young.

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- With out god, life is everything.
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  #2  
Old 07-30-2018, 11:47 AM
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If you could ask your animals some questions?

I would ask the GSD why she barks for no reason at three in the morning? Why do you let the cat take your bed and then whine until I set it straight. Your 100 pounds. The cat is six.

The cat, why do you ambush me when Im on the couch? Why do you hide my keys? Why do you make out with clean linens? Why do you put dog food in the GSDs water bowl? Are you a reincarnated maniac?
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  #3  
Old 07-30-2018, 01:47 PM
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Cat-1 Pippin. Is there a good reason to go screaming round the house like a richocheting bullet at midnight just after we've managed to get to sleep?

Cat-2 Arwen. You know perfectly damm well that my alarm is set for 5 AM and I'll get right up and feed you so what the **** do you have to start shaking the blinds and banging the lamp switches for at 04:45 for godssake?

Cat-3 Miranda. What the hell happened in your life to make you terrified of your own poop? Why do you have to flee the catbox in an even worse state than Pippin whenever you poop in it smashing into walls and chairs so hard you'll hurt yourself one of these days?

- Peter.
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  #4  
Old 07-30-2018, 04:28 PM
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Howdy davidmash,
As far as turning circles when laying down; As told to me by one of mine. "Why not, One good turn deserves another". ;-)
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  #5  
Old 07-30-2018, 04:32 PM
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Howdy davidmash (again)
As for cat turds. Told to me in no uncertain terms. "Because they taste good". ;-)
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  #6  
Old 07-30-2018, 04:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dubyagee View Post
I would ask the GSD why she barks for no reason at three in the morning? Why do you let the cat take your bed and then whine until I set it straight. Your 100 pounds. The cat is six.

The cat, why do you ambush me when Im on the couch? Why do you hide my keys? Why do you make out with clean linens? Why do you put dog food in the GSDs water bowl? Are you a reincarnated maniac?
GSD?
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Sent from an agnostic abacus

2014 C250 21,XXX my new DD ** 2013 GLK 350 18,000 Wife's new DD**

- With out god, life is everything.
- God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance that's getting smaller and smaller as time moves on..." Neil DeGrasse Tyson
- You can pray for me, I'll think for you.
- When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
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  #7  
Old 07-30-2018, 04:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frank X. Morris View Post
Howdy davidmash,
As far as turning circles when laying down; As told to me by one of mine. "Why not, One good turn deserves another". ;-)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Frank X. Morris View Post
Howdy davidmash (again)
As for cat turds. Told to me in no uncertain terms. "Because they taste good". ;-)
I hate you
__________________
Sent from an agnostic abacus

2014 C250 21,XXX my new DD ** 2013 GLK 350 18,000 Wife's new DD**

- With out god, life is everything.
- God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance that's getting smaller and smaller as time moves on..." Neil DeGrasse Tyson
- You can pray for me, I'll think for you.
- When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
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  #8  
Old 07-30-2018, 04:38 PM
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Howdy David,
GSD= German Shepard Dog
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  #9  
Old 07-30-2018, 05:16 PM
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You can ask your dog all the questions you want but he will not answer. All this shyte is in your head. Dogs will be dogs.
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  #10  
Old 07-30-2018, 10:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rocky raccoon View Post
You can ask your dog all the questions you want but he will not answer. All this shyte is in your head. Dogs will be dogs.
Wow, who pissed in your cheerios?
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Sent from an agnostic abacus

2014 C250 21,XXX my new DD ** 2013 GLK 350 18,000 Wife's new DD**

- With out god, life is everything.
- God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance that's getting smaller and smaller as time moves on..." Neil DeGrasse Tyson
- You can pray for me, I'll think for you.
- When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
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  #11  
Old 07-30-2018, 10:46 PM
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I'll answer your questions David...Dog answering: because I am a dog.

All dogs pretty much do the same silly stuff.
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..I also have a 427 Cobra replica with an aluminum chassis.

Last edited by t walgamuth; 07-31-2018 at 02:02 PM.
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  #12  
Old 07-30-2018, 11:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by davidmash View Post
Wow, who pissed in your cheerios?
Howdy David,
His dog ;-)
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  #13  
Old 07-31-2018, 01:58 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by t walgamuth View Post
I'll answer your questions David....because I am a dog.

All dogs pretty much do the same silly stuff.
I have had 3 dogs. I had a rescue Shelty. She went out and pooped/peed ... done. I have a rescue Min Pin.... same deal... My rescue Catahoula ... she has a whole bunch of crazy in her... love her to death but dam is she goofy.

There are definitely similarities but I think they also all have their unique personalities and traits. I have had many many cats and they all have their very unique personalities.
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Sent from an agnostic abacus

2014 C250 21,XXX my new DD ** 2013 GLK 350 18,000 Wife's new DD**

- With out god, life is everything.
- God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance that's getting smaller and smaller as time moves on..." Neil DeGrasse Tyson
- You can pray for me, I'll think for you.
- When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
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  #14  
Old 07-31-2018, 01:59 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frank X. Morris View Post
Howdy David,
His dog ;-)
Lol.
__________________
Sent from an agnostic abacus

2014 C250 21,XXX my new DD ** 2013 GLK 350 18,000 Wife's new DD**

- With out god, life is everything.
- God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance that's getting smaller and smaller as time moves on..." Neil DeGrasse Tyson
- You can pray for me, I'll think for you.
- When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 07-31-2018, 02:01 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pj67coll View Post
Cat-1 Pippin. Is there a good reason to go screaming round the house like a richocheting bullet at midnight just after we've managed to get to sleep?

Cat-2 Arwen. You know perfectly damm well that my alarm is set for 5 AM and I'll get right up and feed you so what the **** do you have to start shaking the blinds and banging the lamp switches for at 04:45 for godssake?

Cat-3 Miranda. What the hell happened in your life to make you terrified of your own poop? Why do you have to flee the catbox in an even worse state than Pippin whenever you poop in it smashing into walls and chairs so hard you'll hurt yourself one of these days?

- Peter.
Arwen sounds like a hoot. Harper, my catahoula will go to sleep on her dog bed every night. Refuses to go to sleep on our bed. At about 7am every morning, she wakes up, and jumps on the bed to sleep stretched out by me on the edge of the bed. If I am too close to the edge of the bed, she will whine till I move over. Why?

__________________
Sent from an agnostic abacus

2014 C250 21,XXX my new DD ** 2013 GLK 350 18,000 Wife's new DD**

- With out god, life is everything.
- God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance that's getting smaller and smaller as time moves on..." Neil DeGrasse Tyson
- You can pray for me, I'll think for you.
- When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.
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