Last night I had to put down my dog - Page 2 - PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum

suginami · #16 11-12-2002, 06:01 PM

I've thought about how I will handle it when and if I have to make the decision to be there when my dog is put to sleep.

I have decided that I will be with her when she goes.

Nobody deserves (even a dog) to die alone.

Piotr · #17 11-13-2002, 12:36 PM

My strong suggestion is:
1) go alone, because then you don't have to worry who sees you crying (and if you love your dog, you will)

2) No matter how bad you think it will be, it's usuallyMUCH worse,

3) Do it quickly.

All I can say is that this was the first time I cried in, oh , 20 years

BENZ-LGB · #18 11-13-2002, 12:57 PM

After the vet told me that there was probably nothing else that they could do for Pepper, and that even a number of surgical procedures would not guarantee either Pepper's survival or a "decent" quality fo life for her, I asked to be left alone with Pepper to say good-bye. That's when she licked my hands one last time and then, turned her head and shoulders away from me, as if to say "do what you know you have to do."

I was crying like a baby and, for the first time in my adult life, I didn't care who saw me.

I couldn't, however, be in the room when they gave her the final shot. I now regret not being there, but I was in too much pain to be in the room. I had been present in other occasions when I had to euthanize other family pets and from that experience I knew that the shot works quickly.

I know that it was probably cowardly of me not to spend the last few seconds with her, but I had already said good-bye to Pepper and I was not sure that I could take any more hurt for that day. I will probably regret my failings, and yes my selfishness, for the rest of my life. But life is a series of decisions, some good, some bad, some just OK. You cannot dwell on things that cannot be changed, all you can do is learn from your mistakes and then move on.

I do regret not letting my middle daughter come along with me. She wanted to be with Pepper at the vet. But I wanted to spare her the pain of watching Pepper slip away from life. By protecting her, I denied her the right to say her good-byes, and for that I will always be sorry.

Being a Dad (parent) is not an easy task. I want to hold my kids and protect them for as long as I can, but I know that I will not always be there to keep them safe, just like I was not able to keep Pepper from getting stuck in that fence. One is always walking a fine line between protecting one's children from the pains and hurts of life and allowing them the freedom to chose to experience some of those pains and, in the process, become a better person.

I am glad,however, to have friends like you, ready to offer understanding, compassion and support. Thanks.

MikeTangas · #19 11-13-2002, 03:12 PM

In direct relation to this sad thread (it almost got to me again today - with no rain to "hide" in), the Canadian comic "For Better Or Worse" has been dealing with this very subject this week. Every time I've read the funny pages this week, I couldn't help but think about you and Pepper.

suginami · #20 11-13-2002, 03:49 PM

BENZ-LGB, what a thoughtful post. I can tell you are a kind man who loves his children.

I wouldn't torment yourself about the decision you made on whether or not you to be there with your dog when she was put to sleep. It was a very emotional time and you made the decision the way you had to at that moment. I don't think anyone views what you did as cowardly. I know I sure don't.

Regarding your middle daughter, only a parent can decide whether or not a child is mature enough to deal with the loss of a pet. She may or may not have been able to handle it, but at least it's been a learning experience for you.

Piotr · #21 11-13-2002, 10:37 PM

Benz- after my own experience - I will NEVER let my son see any of the animals being "put down." it's about as peaceful as watching an execution. In an electric chair.

I WILL NOT go into the details, but for my Bear it was not peaceful "just like falling asleep", and I know HE knew what was going on. And he did not want to let go.
Sorry if I said too much. But in my opinion you are much better off regretting not being there, then actually witnessing it.

And the "he is much better off" explanation works-for about 5 minutes. Crap, now I keep seeing these 5 seconds again. Sorry, but I think I'm done here.