long time friend.....gone - PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum

BenzOnline · #1 05-11-2003, 02:14 PM

Well, a friend that I knew for 6yrs now is now gone......things this year didnt go good in our friendship for some reasons and after many arguments and forgivenesses I gave up and decided not to speak to him anymore and move on. He noticed this in the few past weeks and told another friend of mine about it and that he now doesnt want to speak to me etc.

I have a feeling he got jealous of me for some fortunate things that happened to me this past year and now me working in a big engineering company for co-op, but still you shouldnt be like that.

I was just wondering who else was in these situations where you had a friend for a long time and then all of a sudden...goners! In a way I feel better sometimes but when thinking about the good times then its a bit depressing.

TTaM · #2 05-11-2003, 02:48 PM

I recently had something like this happen. My best friend of 18 years, [I'm 20 so I've known him my whole life] starting dating this crazy girl. She has changed him in such a way that he never talks to any of us, his 'former friends.' She told him she doesn't want him hanging around us anymore, we are bad influences. It upsets me that he actually listened to her. We go to the same school, and I saw him all of twice the last semester. He has become a recluse. All I hope is that one day he realizes he is alone because of this girl, who is quite unattractive by the way, and sees that one does need friends in life.

The Warden · #3 05-11-2003, 03:23 PM

I'm kinda going through something similar myself...although I wouldn't say that anything bad happened per se. He just fell in with a different group of people, and now spends just about all of his time with them. I suppose that people change, but it still hurts, as for years, he was the only real friend I had...

We still talk, but not all that often anymore...

BenzOnline · #4 05-11-2003, 04:35 PM

this friend that I "had" has changed alot this year....we went together this year to college and together we met new people and were in the same class....he got so obsessed with this one friend that he even joined his religion (we are roman catholic and he went to become a christian) in like 24hrs!

This I accepted at the time although I found it weird. Then whenever he would see me now and I used a swear word he would give me a speech about how bad it is to swear and I am sinning and he has "virgin ears" and all this crap.......meanwhile before he changed his so called "religion" he was the biggest swearer.

This is when I started to loosen the rope.....then a new "sin" came up.....its a sin to go to a bar and clubbing!

Once again he gave me another speech about it and all of this is coming from his new religion and it pisses me off the most because this aint his original religion and hes telling me how to live my life and act!!!

He put me down so much lately its not funny so I gave up!

Snibble · #5 05-11-2003, 06:31 PM

I find it that girls are more likely to do this.

It sucks.. but once they get tired, they sometimes change back and "realize" their mistakes.

Also.. I don't get it when they say "I'm Christian, not Roman Catholic". Roman Catholicism *is* part of Christianity and is considered christianity. Its not some "other" religion.

Mark... just give it time, I am thinking he will come back when he realizes.

BenzOnline · #6 05-11-2003, 06:46 PM

Sharif, this friendship was like a car thats a "lemon"...I just kept fixing it or he did and I have decided to finally sell it and get rid of it cause of too many "repairs"!!!

#7 05-11-2003, 06:51 PM

Friends come and go. I could write some long story about a long time close friend lost but I think you would thank me for sparing you boring details.

Keep in mind if they walk out of your life so easily why would you really want them to be your friend. I hold the bar pretty high for people I associate with, I think it comes from the Rangers where I entrusted my friends with my life and I still hold the same standard today. I have lots many acquaintances and a few friends and prefer to keep it that way, because I like to keep track of who I can trust.

Lose a friend to religion? I love that one I thought they were supposed to learn Love and Tolerance

The only thing most born again folks learn is how to polarize themselves and be a hypocrite.

Frank X. Morris · #8 05-11-2003, 09:17 PM

Howdy All,
Friends come and go, enemies just accumulate

#9 05-12-2003, 01:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by rsbiomedical
The only thing most born again folks learn is how to polarize themselves and be a hypocrite.

Yup. A guy I used to work with years ago became "born-again". He really went off the deep end. I gave him a lot of latitude, knowing that what he was really doing was looking for meaning in his life, which is good.

I moved and we lost touch. A few years later I learned that he had "come out of the closet". Saddens me.

G-Benz · #10 05-12-2003, 11:29 AM

You will have many acquaintances in life...true friends are few.

I have but "one" true friend, in my whole life, and he is still that currently.

You find out early who your friends really are when you are dealing with adversity. It he/she still sticks by you, that is your real friend. Goes the same way the other way around.

Rsbiomedical pointed this out with his friendship with fellow Rangers...friendships in this arena are not made, they are forged!

You don't necessarily have to have the same goals, likes, etc. But you stick together through all life has to throw at you.

Religious zealots can really tax a friendship. I believe a true friend who has "found" God shares their enthusiasm with a close friend and may even invite that person to join them. But a hypocritical zealot is one who suddenly takes a hoiler-than-thou stance and starts to berate a friend's choice of habits, lifestyles...and religion.

I don't believe Jesus would have advanced the Christian cause too well if he spent the better part of his days judging souls instead of offering a way to salvation...and even then, those who feared him eventually had him killed!

BenzOnline · #11 05-12-2003, 12:27 PM

well I have 2 friends that I see and they are his friends also and it would be difficult now to see them at the same time so I emailed this "enemy friend" and told him that we dont have to be friends anymore but lets just not be enemies when we have to see eachother because it makes things difficult and not fun at all. I told him things wont be the same again like they use to but lets just try to cooperate.

I will see what happens. Do you think I did the right thing?

1967250s · #12 05-12-2003, 06:38 PM

I have (hade) a love hate relationship with my half brother for over 25 years. I have put an end to it last year (for the last time-3rd in 25 years). When it's time to throw out the "garbage" it's time to throw out the "garbage".

Will never take crap from him again!

My moto is : if you can't fix it get rid of it!

Life is to short to endure somebody else's S**T.

It's not over till the fat lady sings, she as song

At 44, I do not accept any "crap" (dishonesty, hypocracy, agression, manipulation etc etc etc) from anybody anymore, now I do understand old folks

It's good to clean-up one's closet once (dare I say) a day