Don't forget....
 

"Do not marry somebody you can live with...marry somebody you can not live without."

What's the rush? Why the obsession with the first kiss? Like you want to get it over with as a matter of what? Honor, ego? The first kiss should be surreal. Sounds like a fabulous relationship starting. Oh, the anticipation of seeing her again! This is the most exciting time! Enjoy it! Revel in it! All too soon it will be burps and farts.

I havent read anything but your first post.

I say just go for it. Give her the kiss, maybe even ask her what the deal is. Are we dating or what? are we just friends? Etc.

You never know. she could just be shy, or she could be stringing you along, or she could just think of you as a great friend.

Either way, make the first move, and if that doesn't work, talk to her and find out what her deal is.

Alon

Truer words were never spoken!!

You guys are the BEST! Thank you.

I think I wrote the original post while still over-analyzing the situation. Like I told my sister last night (uh.... who I called to talk to on the way home from Barbara's....) I always tend to think too much about things that don't need that much thinking. I suppose it's the "communications major" in me or something.

Glenmore: you hit the nail on the head! :) Fact is, the beginning of a realationship complete with all its anxieties, thrills, spills and everything else, is one of the most exciting thigs a person can experience in life. I shouldn't be so much of a "guy", making something physical like a kiss (or the lack thereof) be such a barometer of how we're getting along. Thing is, we're getting along just FINE-- kiss or not.

Time for me to realize (again) that if I want something really worth keeping for the long haul, I should learn to be a bit more patient. :)

PS And getting to the "burps and farts" stage is pretty cool in my book too. As for me, it's usually farts!

Kissin' don't last......Cookin' do!

Gilly

I seen your pic and yu a big dude 126. Chiks dig it too man.

"Barbara's" ??????????????????????????? is she >gasp< Polish???

That would explain a lot. My current wife attacked me on the parking lot on the first date. We would have gone all the way on the second one, but I run away (been going through a bad divorce and really did not want to start something that quickly- so I waited untill the third date :D ).

If she is not Polish, you may have a lot work to do. Like finding out if she is seeing somebody else. Don't guess. I always assumed the best and found out the worst. She actually may be dating somebody else that just likes going out with you (happened to me, except I was the other guy).

Good luck anyway. :cool:

Third date seems like it should've happened
 

While I'd love to say that it's normal and perfectly fine that things are going slow, I've got to say that if you guys are getting along so well and having such a great time and you get the CHEEK! You gotta ask... what gives.

Honestly, who knows what makes women do what they do, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't question and stumble along blindly.

Before my latest attachment, I ended up in situations similar to this and everyone without exception ended up being a "friend." That may be perfectly cool with you but I was young and dumb and full of...... Sooo friendship wasn't what I was looking for.

I find the longer you date get along great and don't seal the deal the more likely you are to end up in the friend category. Most hated quote, "I love you, You're like a big brother!"

Beware the Big Brother syndrome!!!

That Guy:

You've got that right!! I'm having a party at my house this Friday and she'll be there.

Planning to take her for a "little walk" during to party to "seal the deal". Works out for me either way: either she's open to it, or I know she doesn't want it to go that way and I can return to the party, get drunk, and move on...

I still get the feeling that she's a "take it slow" type of person and that she's interested in me romantically. The "thank you" letter after our second date (yes, she referred to it as our second date) tells me she considers what we're doing as more than just to "buds" hanging out. Or, I could be completely wrong! :D

I'll let y'all know. :)

PS One of my closest friends didn't kiss his girlfriend until two months after their first date!! They've been married a little over a year and my godson (uh... their son) is now three months old. Go figure.

Wait until you can't bear the thought of another kissless "date" and ask" when do I get a kiss on the lips instead of the cheek"?

If she balks you'll find out wha the deal is.

Good luck

No, she's Italian like me! :)

But I did date a Polish girl named Barbara a few years back. Totally used and abuse by her-- turned out she had gotten back together with her former boyfriend without telling me. I found out through a mutual friend. Better off without her!!

I actually learned some very good insight into what's going on in Barbara's head right now through a mutual friend.

But........ not to let you guys hang....... it's too late to write it all now and I have to be at the IRS tomorrow to direct a show that will help their agents get more of OUR money from us. In time is 7:15 am. :(

I post tomorrow night. :D

I know exactly the feelings you are having. I think it is natural to expect a kiss after a third date if all seems well, good, you have a good time together …. But I am a man. Women, I learned are different.

Years ago before I met my wife I dated a lot after the end of a long-term relationship. I dated one particular gal for over six months.

Same type of thing: fun together, but something wasn’t right. She avoided “the next step” and it drove me crazy. What I learned was women are much broader (sorry) in their different relationships. They can love many for many different reasons. It seems to me the more conservative the greater the hesitance. Hesitance often meant fear in what I saw.

The advice to watch Blind Date is excellent. At my ripe old age I am seeing so clearly signals that I missed in my dating years. Check it out.

I would suggest warming things up, which should occur naturally if all is going well, but instead of being so male (objective oriented) try hugging. Long, soft tender hugs. You will feel her respond in your arms if she likes being with you. If she responds, a kiss is simply a natural step in the dance. If you feel her tight and hesitant, then talking about what is going on will reveal, in my opinion, what is in her heart (and head), whether directly or indirectly.

The gal I mentioned previously was a wonderful person. We had a great time together. We could have had a great life together but HER hesitance drove US apart.

Two hesitant people often mesh well together, but one who is and one who isn’t, is really but a foundation for growing frustration in the future.

Don’t look for signs, but instead feel how she is. It is often said: first ask a man what he thinks and then how he feels. Always ask a woman how she feels first and then what she thinks.

Thank you for sharing this with us.

Haasman

Damn Haasman, you are a very sensitive man.;) :eek: