What's the dumbest thing you've done when drunk?

[jjl]

Ok, let's hear it.

I'll start off. During my student days we celebrated someone's birthday starting at lunchtime at an off-campus pub. By early evening, we were 'birling', and on the way back to the halls, I decided to swim across the artificial lake (as you do). I got halfway across when my pants came off around my ankles - damn near drowned. I made it to the other side, but lost my pants and had to walk back to the halls more-or-less naked with lots of people about. I was so drunk I thought this was funny. I guess it still is.

I'm sure some of you guys can top this...

[boneheaddoctor]

I got pissed off at someone even more drunk than I was, at my own party, dragged them outside and handcuffed them to the porch railing.

About 2 hours later at 3am I had to explain to the police why a screaming drunk was handcuffed to my porch. They neighbors had called the cops because he was making such a racket.

[chazola]

JJL- you're Scottish- doesn't that mean you're never sober?

-and did you mean your pants in the American or British meaning?

I think the stupidest thing I did when drunk was have an argument in the middle of a pub with a girl I was seeing infront of all her workmates. I walked out, and then thinking it would look cool in a 'movie-type-way', I stormed back in expecting to make a grand statement that would make me look great. Instead she ignored me and I looked like a right tit as two burley blokes man-handled me out of the pub.

I also tried to jump a pavement in a graveyard on my bike whilst doing about 100 mph downhill, didn't figure on the fence that came flying towards me and promtly slammed into it trashing my bike and bashing my front teeth in.

[moparmike]

Drink more.

[GermanStar]

Originally Posted by narwhal

Most all things I have done when drunk have been dumb. I think the exercise of rating them would probably cause me to focus on the need to enroll in some sort of 'spa' during the holidays

Or you could have a few drinks to get in the mood....

[KirkVining]

I remember my first really good drunk. It lasted from 1972 until around 1976.

[koop]

"If you're going to arrest him you're gonna have to arrest me too!"

[jjl]

Originally Posted by chazola

JJL- you're Scottish- doesn't that mean you're never sober?

-and did you mean your pants in the American or British meaning?

I think the stupidest thing I did when drunk was have an argument in the middle of a pub with a girl I was seeing infront of all her workmates. I walked out, and then thinking it would look cool in a 'movie-type-way', I stormed back in expecting to make a grand statement that would make me look great. Instead she ignored me and I looked like a right tit as two burley blokes man-handled me out of the pub.

I also tried to jump a pavement in a graveyard on my bike whilst doing about 100 mph downhill, didn't figure on the fence that came flying towards me and promtly slammed into it trashing my bike and bashing my front teeth in.

Chaz, that's a good one. I did something similar. Iused to cycle back to my off-campus flat (the same Univ. as above) after spending the evening in the students union. Very stupid - I used to crash regularly. I came down a lane to find large victorian gates normally open, closed - knocked myself unconscious.

pants = british version (trousers).

rarely sober scots = yes, our beer is better than yours.

What about the rest of you guys, you can't be that dull - or shy - only three stories so far? Take a minute off putting the world to rights.

[Diesel4me]

Back in my Sam Houston State days, I had a job as the night shift manager at the Wendy's restaurant across the street from campus. One Friday night the whole restaurant crew decided to get together at a pub and party. Of course since I had to close the restaurant, I was going to be late getting to the pub (and would be behind on my drinking) so when I got to my dorm I consumed a 750 ml bottle of MD 20/20 in about ten minutes time, then walked over to the pub.

I got there and joined my friends, who were consumming beer by the pitcher, so being young and dumb, I joined in.

The MD 20/20 and the beer didn't mix well. I was standing next to the general manager of the restaurant at a table in the pub, a tall, thin young man, about 6'7", blonde hair blue eyes, he was dreamy. I was on my third pitcher when i realized my right hand was going from his butt, to between his legs to the front. When I realized what I was doing, I turned and looked at him and he looked at me with the biggest smile I had ever seen. I withdrew my hand immediately, and the rest of the evening was pretty much uneventful. I don't remember going back to the dorm, but somehow I did.

The next day I was FIRED.

You saw that coming right?

[chazola]

JJL- "rarely sober scots = yes, our beer is better than yours."

hehe- it's not my beer, though there is brewery here in PA, Yuengling (German in origin) that does good (and cheap) beers. Even my friends from home visiting admitted it was good.

I must say my American friends here are a bit lightweight, 3 pints and they're usually done. (or maybe I'm just hanging with the wrong crowd).

My dad was a right boozer, he would delight me with stories of how he fell down steps in snowy Edinburgh (those steep ones between the streets), fell off a gangway in Brooklyn into a cargo net while his ship was in drydock, and crashed his vw beetle into a fence in Australia. I have a long way to go to match up...

[Maki]

The dumbest thing I ever did while drunk: got behind the wheel of a car. A local constable made that point for me, and a Waukesha County, Wis., court commissioner reinforced it with a 3-month license suspension and a fat fine about 20 years ago I have to say the boys turned my life around, and I'm grateful. I like a drink, but I don't drive drunk anymore. The possibilities are too tragic.

My crazier days involved LSD; I'm thinking specifically about two hits of two-way Purple Haze at a very early Pink Floyd concert. I'm afraid I can't translate that into words, and in retrospect, I'd probably have halved that dose. Still get off on listening to the band's recordings from that period, though.

Russ

[Zeitgeist]

...close the bar and look around for my consolation prize...shudderrrrrr

[GermanStar]

Here's a story about a sinner,
He used to be a winner who enjoyed a life of prominence and position,
But the pressures at the office and his socialite engagements,
And his selfish wife's fanatical ambition,
It turned him to the booze,
And he got mixed up with a floosie
And she led him to a life of indecision.
The floosie made him spend his dole
She left him lying on Skid Row
A drunken lag in some Salvation Army Mission.
It's such a shame.

Oh demon alcohol,
Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would say,
Damn it all and blow it all,
Oh demon alcohol,
Memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would fall a slave to demon alcohol.
Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would fall a slave to demon alcohol.

Barley wine, pink gin,
He'll drink anything,
Port, pernod or tequila,
Rum, scotch, vodka on the rocks,
As long as all his troubles disappeared.
But he messed up his life, went and beat up his wife,
And the floosie's gone and found another sucker
She's gonna turn him on to drink
She's gonna lead him to the brink
And when his money's gone,
She'll leave him in the gutter,
It's such a shame.

Oh demon alcohol,
Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would say,
Damn it all and blow it all,

Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would fall,
A slave to demon alcohol.

[84300DT]

Originally Posted by GermanStar

Here's a story about a sinner,
He used to be a winner who enjoyed a life of prominence and position,
But the pressures at the office and his socialite engagements,
And his selfish wife's fanatical ambition,
It turned him to the booze,
And he got mixed up with a floosie
And she led him to a life of indecision.
The floosie made him spend his dole
She left him lying on Skid Row
A drunken lag in some Salvation Army Mission.
It's such a shame.

Oh demon alcohol,
Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would say,
Damn it all and blow it all,
Oh demon alcohol,
Memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would fall a slave to demon alcohol.
Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would fall a slave to demon alcohol.

Barley wine, pink gin,
He'll drink anything,
Port, pernod or tequila,
Rum, scotch, vodka on the rocks,
As long as all his troubles disappeared.
But he messed up his life, went and beat up his wife,
And the floosie's gone and found another sucker
She's gonna turn him on to drink
She's gonna lead him to the brink
And when his money's gone,
She'll leave him in the gutter,
It's such a shame.

Oh demon alcohol,
Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would say,
Damn it all and blow it all,

Sad memories I cannot recall,
Who thought I would fall,
A slave to demon alcohol.

ahh, a Kinks fan ! remember them well

[Botnst]

"I love you...uh....Sharo...uh.....Rebecca." Buuuuuurrrrppp.

Dialogue from there goes really bad.