when i was in junior high i could never understand why my dad had one friend and so did my mom. back then i had so many friends i never knew who to hang out with. as the years went by and i got out of school the nuber dropped. im now only 18, but i work 40+ hours a week. i have one true friend. he lives with me and i consider him my brother. well two actully. my gf counts as one. i have found that even the closest of friends seem to disappear. one of my oldest friends moved out of the neighbor hood and a mile down the road. i see him about once a month. all of the kids that i used to consider friends are still doin drugs and partying all the time. none of them have jobs either. i now understand why my dad has only one friend. has anyone else ever noticed this?

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have no worries.....President Obama swears "If you like your gun, you can keep it

I know Jeffry Dahlmer had that happen in his social life. He had an appetite for friends.

I had noticed this with my own dad but hadn't made the connection that it was widespread, but I think you're on to something. Does it mean that now that I'm past 50, my group of friends will slowly reduce to 0 and then begin expanding again as enemies?

How many friends are necessary for a good life and how close (geographically) do they need to be? I had a good friend in college but hadn't seen her in 25 yrs. We hooked up in NYC a few years ago and it was as if no years had passed. Our friendship had been able to survive that long dormancy and despite all the things that had happened to us in the intervening years, they made no difference. Some of those changes were substantial. I had changed from being a minister to being a functional atheist while she had continued on in her role as a minister's wife. It makes me wonder what are the precise psychological/sociological grounds of friendship that seem to transcend apparently fundamental differences.

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1977 300d 70k--sold 08
1985 300TD 185k+
1984 307d 126k--sold 8/03
1985 409d 65k--sold 06
1984 300SD 315k--daughter's car
1979 300SD 122k--sold 2/11
1999 Fuso FG Expedition Camper
1993 GMC Sierra 6.5 TD 4x4
1982 Bluebird Wanderlodge CAT 3208--Sold 2/13

Friends come and go, enemies accumulate. Funny how that works.

You can only split your time so many ways. I have plenty of friends, but I have time for only a couple on any regular basis.

And if you are worried now wait until that GF is a wife and that roommate is a six week old.

Also, just because you don't spend any time with people doesn't mean you aren't friends anymore. Just keep in touch and hang out when you can.

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Pxland

2001 Honda Accord

1995 Jeep Cherokee

1973 MB 280SEL 4.5

I have a few close friends that I can trust with anything and too many acquaintances that I have trusted as friends and burned me.

True enough. Plenty of friends when I was 18, down to a trusted few today. Life has a way of constantly testing friendships, only the strongest survive the years.

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Chris
2007 E550 4Matic - 61,000 Km - Iridium Silver, black leather, Sport package, Premium 2 package
2007 GL450 4Matic - 62,000 Km - Obsidian Black Metallic, black leather, all options
1998 E430 - sold
1989 300E - 333,000 Km - sold
1977 280E - sold
1971 250 - retired

"And a frign hat. They gave me a hat at the annual benefits meeting. I said. how does this benefit me. I dont have anything from the company.. So they gave me a hat." - TheDon

Good thread.

My Mom had enlightened me about the same sort of thing, and pointed out the couple of trusted "real" friends, versus the many "acquaintances".

That has held true for my wife and I as well...the pool has shrunk down to two...

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2009 ML350 (106K) - Family vehicle
2001 CLK430 Cabriolet (80K) - Wife's car
2005 BMW 645CI (138K) - My daily driver
2016 Mustang (32K) - Daughter's car

. . . may account for part of it. I had a good buddy whom I met in junior high; he got me into "Star Trek" fandom, which led to our meeting our first wives and then my second. We hung out together over more than 20 years.

Then he married wife no. 2 and started having children right, left, and down the middle. Now I don't care for children (actually that's a gross understatement). So the last thing I wanted to do was visit a house full of yelling kids, half of whom smelled like used diapers -- and the last thing he was able to do was get away from all that for a while. He kept parroting the Parental Party Line, e.g., "It's the greatest thing I've ever done," "It's all worth it," et cetera ad nauseam . . . but I noticed he took every opportunity to slink away from the hellhole of his home, and smoke a few joints in peace and quiet.

He was living on the Gulf Coast when Katrina hit. I haven't been able to locate him, and the chances of his being online are small (with all those rugrats, he couldn't afford a phone, let alone a computer). I hope he's okay. But if I woke up in his life tomorrow, the first thing I'd do is look for a gun to use on myself.

Different paths in life, I guess. And the divergence between the paths of parents and non-parents is the biggest of all.

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-- Paul W. (The Benzadmiral)
('03 Buick Park Avenue, charcoal/cream)
Formerly:
'97 C230, smoke silver/parchment; '86 420SEL, anthracite/light grey; '84 280CE (W123), dark blue/palomino

this fits...

Let me run with you tonight
I’ll take you on a moonlight ride
There’s someone I used to see
But she don’t give a damn for me

But let me get to the point, let’s roll another joint
And tu rn the radio loud, I’m too alone to be proud
You don’t know how it feels
You don’t know how it feels to be me

People come, people go
Some grow young, some grow cold
I woke up in between
A memory and a dream

So let’s get to the point, let’s roll another joint
Let’s head on down the road
There’s somewhere I gotta go
And you don’t know how it feels
You don’t know how it feels to be me

My old man was born to rock
He’s still tryin’ to beat the clock
Think of me what you will
I got a little space to fill

So let’s get to the point, let’s roll another joint
Let’s head on down the road
There’s somewhere I gotta go
And you don’t know how it feels
No, you don’t know how it feels to be me

--Tom Petty

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...Tracy

'00 ML320 "Casper"
'92 400E "Stella"

Truer words were never said. The divergence transcends the workplace as well as social life.

It seems like after the school years, people just branch off and focus on different interests. As mentioned above, its really a blessing to have a life-long friend that you can just reconnect with despite the long intervals in between. I have one such friend. I suspect its pretty rare to maintain a friendship from 1st grade thru adulthood.

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1985 380SE Blue/Blue - 230,000 miles
2012 Subaru Forester 5-speed
2005 Toyota Sienna
2004 Chrysler Sebring convertible
1999 Toyota Tacoma

...this is why you buy a dog...best friends 'til the very end...

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1995 black pearl/black Mercedes-Benz E420 :