Healthy disregard for money? - PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum

raymr · #1 11-06-2006, 12:05 AM

My 2 kids who are 15 don't seem to care about their money. They often keep their wallets laying around the house or money laying around loose in various places. We are not wealthy, and they do not get an allowance, so everything they have is from baby sitting, odd jobs, or birthday gifts from grandma. I don't recall being this careless with money at that age.

In one respect its good, I think, but I want to instill more responsibility. Eventually they will be in situations where people aren't so trusting. Today I finally asked about a $20 that was laying on the kitchen table for 2 days. My son said it was his sister's. I stuck it in my pocket this morning and so far nobody has asked about it. It makes me wonder how much money is disappearing or getting accidentally thrown in the garbage, etc. due to carelessness.

#2 11-06-2006, 12:34 AM

IMHO.

It's nice to see that your family feels so comfortable around each other that they can do this. They trust each other, and that is good.

The real world isn't so good, and I shudder to think what their "friends" do when they aren't loooking or paying attention. They are too old for a piggybank, but a bank account with no monthly fee's might not be out of the question. That way, the bulk of the money is safe from sticky fingers.

I never got an allowance myself, and I will always remember my dad telling me that if I wanted something I had better start saving for it. Though, a good primer for me were the old S&H green stamps they used to give out, and the returnable Coca-Cola bottles. Both of these were great ways to teach a kid about the value of money.

Today, it's a mostly cashless society, so young men and women can't/don't see the real deal green stuff changing hands and making the world go 'round. It's just numbers on paper anymore. If we were on the gold standard today, it would be easier to explain the value of money.

aklim · #3 11-06-2006, 12:46 AM

Well, when others rip them off, maybe they will learn that the world is not so nice a place. Till then, I would adopt an attitude of "finders keepers". You miss it, you search around for it and then ask me. If after 60 days you don't claim it form "lost and found", it is mine.

POS · #4 11-06-2006, 08:35 AM

I think it's great that they trust each other like that, and I also think it's good that they don't put that much importance on money (at 15, you should know the value of it, but not be obsessed with it). The lesson for them to learn here is, if you leave valuable things lying around, you just may lose them. When you lose them, you'll learn not to leave them around.

I'd take the bills and put them away somewhere. If they ask about them, tell them you took them and then give them back.

raymr · #5 11-06-2006, 08:50 AM

I'm sure they have been ripped off already. They don't even seem to realize it. Some of their friends seem a little squirrelly and I could easily see one of them slipping something into their purse or pocket.

The kids have bank accounts, but they think its a joke whenever they see the statement where they earn 80 cents in interest. They also see it as a one-way funnel; If their money goes in, its next to impossible to get it back again (mostly our fault). I tried to get them interested in investing by letting them research and chose stocks that we buy. They picked Walmart and Underarmor, but don't know or care how their picks are doing.

One thing is for sure, we are putting off the co-signed debit card thing for as long as possible. Their older brother put everything on his bank card, producing 5-page statements, along with many $35 overwithdrawal charges. He too suffers from the same syndrome, but he's across the country now in college, opened his own student account and hopefully being smarter about it.

Maybe I'm expecting too much.

G-Benz · #6 11-06-2006, 11:04 AM

Cool thread!

My daughter got a good lesson in the effort of earning cash after having to babysit some rather difficult children all summer. She made great money, but was frustrated with having to turn down social activities with friends because of her summer job.

Still, since most of her creature comforts are covered by us, there never has been a real worry on her part about where money goes and how it does.

She didn't seem to ruffled about having some expensive sneakers stolen from her gym locker...which we later found out she never bothered to LOCK!

But in the future, she will be paying for more of these items herself. Probably will be more aware of the state of her locker(s) then...

#7 11-06-2006, 11:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by raymr

It makes me wonder how much money is disappearing or getting accidentally thrown in the garbage, etc. due to carelessness.

I will do your house cleaning.

Maroon 300D · #8 11-06-2006, 11:45 AM

Let them be kids as long as they can. They'll become responsible adults in due time.

On second thought, though, they should grow up before they're 27.

Hatterasguy · #9 11-06-2006, 10:45 PM

At 15 I was cutting lawns and had earnings statements for said business! Money was always tucked away in a lock box, I have change laying about thats it!

I am way to cheap and organized to have even a $1 un accounted for. Its the German in me I guess.

You really should teach them a lesson before they learn it the expensive way. I'd start taking any money laying around and sticking it into an envolope. Wait until they notice its gone and let them dangle for a little bit. Hopefully after you return it they will realize that they need to be a bit more carefull.

I used to leave my wallet around, now it always stays on my person for fear of my sister ripping me off. I learned not to be so trusting the hard way.

John Doe · #10 11-07-2006, 12:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maroon 300D

Let them be kids as long as they can. They'll become responsible adults in due time.

Here, here. You should be proud your kids don't covet money.

aklim · #11 11-07-2006, 12:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by John Doe

Here, here. You should be proud your kids don't covet money.

Not coveting money is one thing. Being totally careless is quite another.

John Doe · #12 11-07-2006, 12:55 AM

Once again, not having kids......

I just meant that I think its refreshing to hear about teens who aren't obsessed with money. In addition to not having kids, you aren't a WASP from the South, so you may not understand how tacky the subject is

aklim · #13 11-07-2006, 01:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by John Doe

Once again, not having kids......

I just meant that I think its refreshing to hear about teens who aren't obsessed with money. In addition to not having kids, you aren't a WASP from the South, so you may not understand how tacky the subject is

I could have 3 kids tomorrow and I wouldn't change my mind. So far, I have kept myself consistent for pretty much anything in my life so why should having human kids be any different? I look at things from a black and white perspective and I do not flip-flop because my circumstances change. IOW, I don't take one stand until it is beneficial for me to switch.

I did spend a couple years in KY

John Doe · #14 11-07-2006, 01:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aklim

I could have 3 kids tomorrow and I wouldn't change my mind. So far, I have kept myself consistent for pretty much anything in my life so why should having human kids be any different? I look at things from a black and white perspective and I do not flip-flop because my circumstances change. IOW, I don't take one stand until it is beneficial for me to switch.

I did spend a couple years in KY

You have no idea how your mind would or wouldn't change if you had three kids tomorrow--use your logic to figure this out spock.

We are all familiar with your 'casino' anecdotes and stoic theories preference of dogs over kids, ect... I guess life must have really kicked you in the nuts to have so ****ty an outlook. I suspect if you would have grown up like I did, you would not have such a pessimistic view of everything.

aklim · #15 11-07-2006, 01:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by John Doe

You have no idea how your mind would or wouldn't change if you had three kids tomorrow--use your logic to figure this out spock.

We are all familiar with your 'casino' anecdotes and stoic theories preference of dogs over kids, ect... I guess life must have really kicked you in the nuts to have so ****ty an outlook. I suspect if you would have grown up like I did, you would not have such a pessimistic view of everything.

Well, so far I have resisted any temptations to change sides just because I am now getting the short end of the stick and for very important things in my life so why should kids be any different? I am talking about things I have been wanting desperately for over 30 yrs. I understood then why it was so difficult to achieve and I never once changed my mind about why it needed to be so difficult. This was when I was trying to achieve it and it would have made my life much easier if things had gone a different way. I never once wished it could be easier. I just understood why it needed to be that way.

I would say I grew up like you probably did, more or less. Once I was on my own, I learnt from the skool of hard knocks about how wonderful people are. But to give you a clearer picture of it, I have grown up watching others say "no" to one thing today because it is beneficial to them to say "no" and tomorrow, when things change and it is beneficial for them to switch sides, their answer is now "yes". Never liked that and probably never will.

So let me ask you this. Do you switch sides just because today you are getting the short end of the stick with that stand and tomorrow, if things reverse, your position is switched again? For example, if today you felt that kids who steal should go to jail along with their parents. Tomorrow you kid gets busted for stealing. Would you switch positions if it would get you out of hot water?