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#1
03-30-2008, 09:09 PM
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Ohio man facing charges for having sex with a picnic table
http://www.fox19.com/Global/story.asp?S=8083860&nav=menu63_2
 Bellevue Police Captain Matt Johnson says Art Price, Jr., 40, was seen on four occasions between the hours of 10:30 a.m. and noon having sex with his picnic table. What makes this a felony, Johnson says, is that it took place in close proximity to a school, which made it likely that children could have seen Price. This man needs a girlfriend fast. 
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99 Gurkha with OM616 IDI turbo 2015 Gurkha with OM616 DI turbo 2014 Rexton W with OM612 VGT 
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#3
03-30-2008, 09:13 PM
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Price is married with three school-aged children. Neighbors tell us they're now worried about the kids.
Wow! When his wife spreads her legs the world must freeze! After the last kid maybe she just decided to stop...forever!
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1999 SL500 1969 280SE 2023 Ram 1500 2007 Tiara 3200
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#5
03-30-2008, 09:34 PM
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Quote:
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0o==o0 James 4:8 "...let us put aside the blindness of mind of those who can conceive of nothing higher than what is known through the senses" -Saint Gregory Palamas, ---Discourse on the Holy Transfiguration of Our Lord God and Savior Jesus Christ Centrally located in North East Central Pa.
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#7
03-30-2008, 11:38 PM
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Quote:
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#8
03-30-2008, 11:55 PM
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I'd like to see the picnic table.
It kindof reminds me of a farm animal joke..... Oh never mind. Tom W
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[SIGPIC] Diesel loving autocrossing grandpa Architect. 08 Dodge 3/4 ton with Cummins & six speed; I have had about 35 benzes. I have a 39 Studebaker Coupe Express pickup in which I have had installed a 617 turbo and a five speed manual.  [SIGPIC]..I also have a 427 Cobra replica with an aluminum chassis.
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#9
03-31-2008, 12:07 AM
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How about a plastic Sex doll
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99 Gurkha with OM616 IDI turbo 2015 Gurkha with OM616 DI turbo 2014 Rexton W with OM612 VGT
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#10
03-31-2008, 02:04 AM
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And women think us guys are babies when we get slivers in our hands and fingers!!!!
What would he be complaining about if he got a sliver in his "wood?" And how would (pardon the re-pun) he explain the sliver acquisition to the prospective sliver-puller? Are these questions already too far down a slippery slope?  Oh well, no redemption for the wicked... 
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. . M. G. Burg'10 - Dakota SXT - Daily Ride / ≈ 172.5K .'76 - 450SLC - 107.024.12 / < .89.20 K ..'77 - 280E - 123.033.12 / > 128.20 K ...'67 - El Camino - 283ci / > 207.00 K ....'75 - Yamaha - 650XS / < 21.00 K .....'87 - G20 Sportvan / > 206.00 K ......'85 - 4WINNS 160 I.O. / 140hp .......'74 - Honda CT70 / Real 125 . “I didn’t really say everything I said.” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ~ Yogi Berra ~ Last edited by mgburg; 03-31-2008 at 10:44 AM.
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#11
03-31-2008, 08:14 AM
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How will his wife be able to get him back? She might have to cover herself with mustard, ketchup, and grease stains to ever be attractive again.
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1985 380SE Blue/Blue - 230,000 miles 2012 Subaru Forester 5-speed 2005 Toyota Sienna 2004 Chrysler Sebring convertible 1999 Toyota Tacoma
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#13
03-31-2008, 08:35 AM
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That's a really bad case of spring fever. It's a good thing he was caught early in the season.
Here's the site he used to tide himself over during the winter months. http://www.walpolewoodworkers.com/shop/display.cfm?q=Y2F0ZWdvcnlfaWRlbnQ9NiZwYXJlbnRfaWRlbnQ9MCZzZWxlY3RlZD1nYXJkZW5fZnVybmlzaGluZ3M=
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Chad 2006 Nissan Pathfinder LE 1998 Acura 3.0 CL OBK#44 "Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work." - Aristotle (384-322 B.C.) SOLD 1985 300TD - Red Dragon 1986 300SDL - Coda 1991 - 300TE 1995 - E320 1985 300CD - Gladys
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#14
03-31-2008, 08:36 AM
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police capt matt"johnson"needs to get the facts straight.it was not a picnic table it was a patio table,picnic tables don't have an oriface for an umbrella!
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