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#1
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I remember snow
I love a fresh snow. Especially the light fluffy stuff. The countryside turns quiet, peaceful; idyllic. As your countenance takes in the wilderness and you survey the surroundings you’re senses are magnified 2 db. Take a deep breath. No, a real deep breath. Okay, try not to cough. Now exhale. Ahhhh. You feel invigorated and ready to slay the day.
It was under these conditions that I found myself attempting a traverse across the back slope of the Pizza Hut parking lot. Parking was brutal down below and a short hike from the upper lot would fall far short of adventurous. Here comes the tricky part. Exceeding the legal grade where most likely chains would be required is the banked corners coming out of turn number one. The kind you’re more familiar with Rusty Wallace or Mario Andretti flying around. Only this time it’s a trap. An ambush. My spidey senses were tingling when my feet attempted a few tricks with some quick slips on the flat grade. That’s when I came across the precipice. I stopped to gather my thoughts and weigh my options. I started to say a short prayer but tossed it when I realized that was for catechism. Then my impetus began to accelerate at the rate of 2 p2 w. Turns out I wasn’t on the precipice at all. Hee! Walk like a duck my ass! Snow Plow! Snow Plow! No herringbone. Herring bone? If you happen to be right handed you sometimes think the same about your feet. Your right leg, that’s your go-to guy. The one you can depend on. The one you can put your weight on. This time the right leg was all go-to… if you know what I mean. How a leg can switch from standing to perpendicular before you can get the b out of Son-of-a The brain. You see the brain is an amazing organ. It processes thoughts faster than a jello fart. One instant you’re trying to recall the last time you got hurt. I mean really hurt. Bone busting, blood curdling, snot gobbler hurt. The next thing you realize is your wondering, “Is that an oil stain or mag chloride smudge on the side of these new shoes?” “Look mom! I can do the river dance!” As you sort out the myriad of injuries that humans succumb to in these types of falls you begin to lobby for the most desirable. Bruise, bruise no, shoulder separation. How about break an arm. But please don’t take the spleen. Leave the spleen. 0.072 seconds into the fall the right leg made a course correction and stabbed down at an obtuse angle somewhere along the fall line and Jesus Christ that hurts! And then it was all over and you’ve quickly made your way down to the flat part, sheepishly glad you didn’t have to waste a “Man Scream” on that one. Anyone see me slip? |
#2
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![]() Nobody saw anything. Honest. Ignore the giggling coming from over in the corner. We all missed it completely.
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1961 220b: first project car - sold. 2000 CLK 430: first modern Benz - sold. 2001 CLK 55: OMG the torque!!! - sold 1972 280SE 4.5: Baby Gustav 1991 300TE 4Matic: Gretel the Snow Bunny - sold 1978 300SD: Katz the Free Man - given away 1980 Redhead: Darling Wife ![]() |
#3
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EXERCISE FOR PEOPLE OVER 50:
Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side. With a 5-lb potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax. Each day you'll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer. After a couple of weeks, move up to 10-lb potato sacks. Then try 50-lb potato sacks and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a 100-lb potato sack in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. (I'm at this level.) After you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each of the sacks. |
#4
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Nice!
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1992 300D 2.5T 1980 Euro 300D (sadly, sold) 1998 Jetta TDI, 132K "Rudy" 1974 Triumph TR6 1999 Saab 9-5 wagon (wife's) |
#5
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Thanks for sharing, glad you're not hurt. Your vivid description of the event had me laughing out loud. It's amazing how many thoughts can go through your mind in a brief moment of panic.
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Chad 2013 Jeep Unlimited Rubicon OBK#44 "Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work." - Aristotle (384-322 B.C.) SOLD 1985 300TD - Red Dragon 1986 300SDL - Coda 1991 - 300TE 1995 - E320 1985 300CD - Gladys 2006 Nissan Pathfinder LE 1998 Acura 3.0 CL |
#6
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Ha -- ha!
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'06 E320 CDI '17 Corvette Stingray Vert |
#7
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another illusion shattered.........
Quote:
But since I came up here, I've shoveled a HELL of a lot of it. THAT really changes your perspective, I guarantee ya... Great write up btw; you are REALLY on top of your game today. ![]()
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![]() 1995 E 420, 170k "The Red Plum" (sold) 2015 BMW 535i xdrive awd Stage 1 DINAN, 6k, <----364 hp 1967 Mercury Cougar, 49k 2013 Jaguar XF, 20k <----340 hp Supercharged, All Wheel Drive ![]() |
#8
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Oh, that kind of snow. Never mind.
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01 Ford Excursion Powerstroke 99 E300 Turbodiesel 91 Vette with 383 motor 05 Polaris Sportsman 800 EFI 06 Polaris Sportsman 500 EFI 03 SeaDoo GTX SC Red 03 SeaDoo GTX SC Yellow 04 Tailgator 21 ft Toy Hauler 11 Harley Davidson 883 SuperLow |
#9
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I should have let y'all know I didn't write that. My bad.
We don't git snow. But I sure as heck remember it from when I lived in Traverse City (elk Rapids, actually), Petosky, Rogers City, Greybull, and Cody. Enough is enough! B |
#10
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secret safe with moi.
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"It's normal for these things to empty your wallet and break your heart in the process." 2012 SLK 350 1987 420 SEL |
#11
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I just had an experience that made me think of this thread.
![]() I was taking out my recycling bin for tomorrow morning's pickup and didn't think anything about the rain I heard falling. I quickly realized it was freezing rain as I stepped off my back porch with the loaded bin in my arms and onto the sidewalk that leads to my garage. It's about 20' long and drops about 1' in that length. As soon as my foot hit the sidewalk I lost my footing and caught myself from falling as I skated the entire length before slamming into the garage door. ![]() I finished taking to bin to the curb by walking in the crunchy grass that offered more stable footing. I just finished sprinkling ice melt on all the sidewalks and will have to check it in the morning before my wife goes out. I think I might have pulled something when I tried to keep from falling. It's awesome getting older. ![]()
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Chad 2013 Jeep Unlimited Rubicon OBK#44 "Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work." - Aristotle (384-322 B.C.) SOLD 1985 300TD - Red Dragon 1986 300SDL - Coda 1991 - 300TE 1995 - E320 1985 300CD - Gladys 2006 Nissan Pathfinder LE 1998 Acura 3.0 CL |
#12
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Ahhh, the last time that something similar like that happened was a year ago in the snow....
I slipped on the driveway, and landed on my tailbone.... I didnt go skiing that trip.
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-Justin 91 560 SEC AMG - other dogs dd 01 Honda S2000 - dogs dd 07 MB ML320 CDI - dd 16 Lexus IS250 - wifes dd it's automatic. |
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