One of my main clients is a widowed sweetheart who owns four rentals. She asked me to help her advertise a basement apt. and so far, all I've got up is the Craigslist post. I listed her phone number but today I got this response:

Hello,

I come across your house for rent advertised on the internet and i am interested in renting it,please let me know if it is still available.I will be signing one year lease for this unit,and will be willing to offer you 2
months rent plus the security deposit in order to secure this unit prior to our arrival.Could you be kind enough to let me know what the electricity/utility cost would be?as i will really need to have this unit to myself.

You can send me the lease application,to enable be review it ahead of time. i would eventually have it signed physically when i arrive in person.

Please do get back to me in time because i will really appreciate a quick response.
Regards

Dr.Douglas Phillips

I replicated the paragraph breaks and puctuation best I could. No doctor I know of would send such a badly composed e-mail, and not many would want a one bedroom apt, a nice little place, but not in the best neighborhood in Oakland.

I'm going to play this nimrod until he asks me to send him the balance of a check that his secretary accidentally made out for too much, like $2,000 too much.

Aw hell, I'll sucker him into wasting overnight FedEd postage, the punk.

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