Soy Un Perdedor - PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum

PaulC · #1 12-04-2010, 11:12 PM

Woke up today - weather was a little crappy, but not so bad. Ran a few errands - so far, so good.

I have cable tv, and the carrier is switching to digital service next week, so I decide to install the digital cable adapters necessary to keep all five TVs working. Four TVs go pretty smoothly.

TV #5 is the primary TV in the house, weighs a ton, and is squeezed into a tall, wide and heavy wooden cabinet/shelving type thing. It's wedged into the corner of the room, and I cannot get behind it without moving it. I calculate that the whole setup probably weighs 275+ lbs., is top-heavy, and is a five-star beatch to move, but move it I must to play with the cabling behind the TV. I pull it out, doing as much lifting as dragging, do the install, and push it back in place.

I initiate the software download as required to complete the convertor setup. Estimated time for download is 20 minutes. Three hours later, download is still underway. Call customer service, get a crappy connection AND a rep with an accent (a deadly combination), and am run through the usual basic customer-is-a-moron questionnaire/flow chart - is the TV on, is the converter plugged in, what's on the screen, etc. As requested, I switch the converter off and on, which reboots everything and restarts the download. Two hours later...well you take a guess. Call customer service, run through the drill once more, reboot/restart.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, my snowmobile dealer calls to tell me that they've completed the pre-season servicing on a pair of sleds that I dropped off last week and they're ready for pickup. The dealer is open for another hour, so I put the hitch on the Xterra, load my toolbox and jack in the back, and hustle down to the dealer. I pay the man his $2, and even though it's fairly late in the afternoon, decide to be efficient and take the sleds to their winter home, a garage on the edge of a snowmobile trail network - 40 miles away.

The trip starts out smoothly, as the Xterra proceeds along a major regional highway. The sun is starting to set, and I'm driving into a relatively high-altitude region, both factors serving to drop the temperature nicely. What was a trip that began on clear, relatively straight roads is now becoming a bit of an adventure on twisty roads that are just iced enough to become interesting. But, I'm used to such driving, and the Xterra feels pretty sure-footed...

Now, I'm less than a mile from my destination. I have to make a left turn off the paved two-lane onto a dirt road. What happens next is the type of thing that would make the instructor of Trailering 101 look over his bifocals and throw a disapproving stare at me. I, uh, forgot to slow down enough before attempting the turn. As I prepared to turn off the paved road onto the slipperier snow-covered dirt road, I sensed that I was coming in a little too hot for conditions. My remedy? I braked - as I began the turn - and 4,400 lbs. of SUV and 1,600 lbs. of snowmobiles and trailer now pushing on the back of the 4,400 lb. SUV simultaneously uttered "Say WHAT?" and decided to reacquaint me with that musty, arcane element of physics known as momentum.

My first clue that my decision-making process should have also received a pre-season servicing was when the ABS started chattering away and the steering grew aloof. My second clue was the drainage ditch and a few large conifers now filling up the view out of my windshield. I took my foot off the brake pedal as if it became red hot, which allowed the front wheels to gain just enough stiction to give me a turning arc just a little bit bigger than I planned. I skirted the ditch so closely that I was sure that I was going in - but it was not to be.

Okay! It's all good now! Got the Talking Heads singing "Take Me to the River" on the radio - feeling pretty good about life in general, and I'm just several hundred yards away from my destination. Just one more little bitty one-lane dirt road to turn onto and traverse...

Hey, um, did I tell you that we had some pretty good windstorms in PA earlier in the week? Caused some damage, not too dramatic, shingles ripping loose, random lawn furniture blown into the next zip code, a few trees fell over...including the sum***** that is now lying across the road in front of me...

Stopped in plenty of time, no problem there, but as I mentally catalogued the contents of my toolbox and realized that a chainsaw or axe were not on the list, I still felt, well, boned. Squinting through the winter-denuded trees that were still standing, I could just make out the garage that represented my destination. But, it may as well have been 100 miles away, for as agile as my skidplated Xterra Off Road is, it would have been 50/50 about going over the tree, and even if the SUV made it, the trailer probably would have been shorn of its axle.

So - got to go home now. What I was counting on as a relatively easy ride back, sans trailer, is now a nighttime trudge. After squeezing the trailer into a garage opening that is just four inches wider than the trailer itself, I go back to the land of digital cable. No joy there, either.

Hit customer service again, politely throwing my shoes through the receiver at the party on the other side of the line, and am transferred away from the scripted schlubs of customer service to their repair section. "Dominick" who sounds as if he lived in Brooklyn for a few years while simultaneously gargling on thumbtacks, listens to my parade of travails and non-results and gives me the good news that the converter box is D.O.A. Have to remove it and bring it to the local branch of the cable company for a replacement. Que merde...

Jim B. · #2 12-04-2010, 11:21 PM

I'll trade you all of that for a broken right leg and foot suffered as a result of a slip 'n' fall on unseen black ice on my driveway two weeks ago.
(estimated recovery date and full leg cast removal 2/11/11).

Deal or NO deal? ?

PaulC · #3 12-05-2010, 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim B.

I'll trade you all of that for a broken right leg and foot suffered as a result of a slip 'n' fall on unseen black ice on my driveway two weeks ago.
(estimated recovery date and full leg cast removal 2/11/11).

Deal or NO deal? ?

I've been trumped. Get well soon...

mgburg · #4 12-05-2010, 01:02 AM

Thank you PaulC for reminding me WHY I just managed to remove my trailer before our little "ice-skating-for-the-1st-time" weather decided to hit us here this weekend...

The Weather-Armageddon-Hosts (or WAH) on TV/Radio/Mall-Food-Courts had been screaming 4"-8" inches of white death from the skies for the past two/three days and giving hourly updates as to when all sanity would flow from our orifices and leave us as dehydrated nimrods behind the wheels of all modes of transporation.

In others words, "Stay in and don't go out."

Jim B., how are you getting around? Do you have one of your lady friends helping you out during your time of need?

I'd think trying to operate an accelerator pedal with the leg/foot cast on...or are you working with a "walking cast" type of setup?

Details!!! We need to know how our OD brethren are doing during this holiday season!!!

10fords · #5 12-05-2010, 01:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PaulC

Woke up today - weather was a little crappy, but not so bad. Ran a few errands - so far, so good.

I have cable tv, and the carrier is switching to digital service next week, so I decide to install the digital cable adapters necessary to keep all five TVs working. Four TVs go pretty smoothly.

TV #5 is the primary TV in the house, weighs a ton, and is squeezed into a tall, wide and heavy wooden cabinet/shelving type thing. It's wedged into the corner of the room, and I cannot get behind it without moving it. I calculate that the whole setup probably weighs 275+ lbs., is top-heavy, and is a five-star beatch to move, but move it I must to play with the cabling behind the TV. I pull it out, doing as much lifting as dragging, do the install, and push it back in place.

I initiate the software download as required to complete the convertor setup. Estimated time for download is 20 minutes. Three hours later, download is still underway. Call customer service, get a crappy connection AND a rep with an accent (a deadly combination), and am run through the usual basic customer-is-a-moron questionnaire/flow chart - is the TV on, is the converter plugged in, what's on the screen, etc. As requested, I switch the converter off and on, which reboots everything and restarts the download. Two hours later...well you take a guess. Call customer service, run through the drill once more, reboot/restart.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, my snowmobile dealer calls to tell me that they've completed the pre-season servicing on a pair of sleds that I dropped off last week and they're ready for pickup. The dealer is open for another hour, so I put the hitch on the Xterra, load my toolbox and jack in the back, and hustle down to the dealer. I pay the man his $2, and even though it's fairly late in the afternoon, decide to be efficient and take the sleds to their winter home, a garage on the edge of a snowmobile trail network - 40 miles away.

The trip starts out smoothly, as the Xterra proceeds along a major regional highway. The sun is starting to set, and I'm driving into a relatively high-altitude region, both factors serving to drop the temperature nicely. What was a trip that began on clear, relatively straight roads is now becoming a bit of an adventure on twisty roads that are just iced enough to become interesting. But, I'm used to such driving, and the Xterra feels pretty sure-footed...

Now, I'm less than a mile from my destination. I have to make a left turn off the paved two-lane onto a dirt road. What happens next is the type of thing that would make the instructor of Trailering 101 look over his bifocals and throw a disapproving stare at me. I, uh, forgot to slow down enough before attempting the turn. As I prepared to turn off the paved road onto the slipperier snow-covered dirt road, I sensed that I was coming in a little too hot for conditions. My remedy? I braked - as I began the turn - and 4,400 lbs. of SUV and 1,600 lbs. of snowmobiles and trailer now pushing on the back of the 4,400 lb. SUV simultaneously uttered "Say WHAT?" and decided to reacquaint me with that musty, arcane element of physics known as momentum.

My first clue that my decision-making process should have also received a pre-season servicing was when the ABS started chattering away and the steering grew aloof. My second clue was the drainage ditch and a few large conifers now filling up the view out of my windshield. I took my foot off the brake pedal as if it became red hot, which allowed the front wheels to gain just enough stiction to give me a turning arc just a little bit bigger than I planned. I skirted the ditch so closely that I was sure that I was going in - but it was not to be.

Okay! It's all good now! Got the Talking Heads singing "Take Me to the River" on the radio - feeling pretty good about life in general, and I'm just several hundred yards away from my destination. Just one more little bitty one-lane dirt road to turn onto and traverse...

Hey, um, did I tell you that we had some pretty good windstorms in PA earlier in the week? Caused some damage, not too dramatic, shingles ripping loose, random lawn furniture blown into the next zip code, a few trees fell over...including the sum***** that is now lying across the road in front of me...

Stopped in plenty of time, no problem there, but as I mentally catalogued the contents of my toolbox and realized that a chainsaw or axe were not on the list, I still felt, well, boned. Squinting through the winter-denuded trees that were still standing, I could just make out the garage that represented my destination. But, it may as well have been 100 miles away, for as agile as my skidplated Xterra Off Road is, it would have been 50/50 about going over the tree, and even if the SUV made it, the trailer probably would have been shorn of its axle.

So - got to go home now. What I was counting on as a relatively easy ride back, sans trailer, is now a nighttime trudge. After squeezing the trailer into a garage opening that is just four inches wider than the trailer itself, I go back to the land of digital cable. No joy there, either.

Hit customer service again, politely throwing my shoes through the receiver at the party on the other side of the line, and am transferred away from the scripted schlubs of customer service to their repair section. "Dominick" who sounds as if he lived in Brooklyn for a few years while simultaneously gargling on thumbtacks, listens to my parade of travails and non-results and gives me the good news that the converter box is D.O.A. Have to remove it and bring it to the local branch of the cable company for a replacement. Que merde...

The source of all your troubles is that you watch too much television

Jim B. · #6 12-05-2010, 07:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mgburg

Thank you PaulC for reminding me WHY I just managed to remove my trailer before our little "ice-skating-for-the-1st-time" weather decided to hit us here this weekend...

The Weather-Armageddon-Hosts (or WAH) on TV/Radio/Mall-Food-Courts had been screaming 4"-8" inches of white death from the skies for the past two/three days and giving hourly updates as to when all sanity would flow from our orifices and leave us as dehydrated nimrods behind the wheels of all modes of transporation.

HAW !!!!

HATE "white death"

But LOVE to read florid prose like that !!!!

good advice for sure, "Stay in and don't go out."

Quote:

Originally Posted by mgburg

Jim B., how are you getting around? Do you have one of your lady friends helping you out during your time of need?

Yeah, Cindy is coming on over later today. She's trained in home health care and is a certified massage therapist too.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mgburg

I'd think trying to operate an accelerator pedal with the leg/foot cast on...or are you working with a "walking cast" type of setup?

lolol

I think god got mad and broke my LEAD FOOT !!!!

The Mercedes is lowered, and impossible to lever out of with a full leg cast, so it's under a car cover in the garage and will be in storage till Valentine's day when I am supposed to be walking nrmay and unaided again.

The Grand Marquis is my taxi and ambulance, and since I can't bend down to get anything I dropped, in there, the floorboards make it look like 30 junkies - each with a DIFFERENT habit, lived in there for a month.

I NEVER thought that *I* would be driving it creeping along at 50 mph, as almost all Grand Marquis owners do...a walker in the back seat... a disabled parking hang tag on the mirror, like MOST Grand Marquis owners do, so I must have been psychic or something earlier this year when I got the car.

Before this happened to me, I had just put Mercury Marauder front and rear sway bars on it and had added a Crown Vic type Police Interceptor dual exhaust to it, and was thinking about adding a Police Interceptor MAF/airbox /ziptube and a 3.27 trac-loc rear end, for more speed, --- I had not meant it to be used like some old geriatric car this quickly.

Maybe the typical owners without broken legs stab the accellerator with their canes !!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oGWSXNBh6es , <------------

Brian Carlton · #7 12-05-2010, 10:15 AM

Paul, I just want you to know that the world is in balance.............

Here's how my Friday went:

Took the BMW back to the tire shop at 7:45 a.m. for a reinspection after if failed fuel trim about a month ago. After a bunch of money tossed at it at the BMW mechanic, it's finally ready to go. Bring it in and I've got to leave it...........too many customers ahead of me. Ask him to check the P6's on the back as the brand new Yokos on the front have not completely solved the vibration problem (but its 90% improved).

Walk home..........25 minutes. Work on a bunch of business paperwork and phone calls ............11:00............tire store calls............car is done.

Grab all the paperwork for the BMW and the "new" 2002 Dodge van that I recently picked up and walk back to the tire store. Notice a brand new Advance Auto Parts right next door to the tire store. Stop in..........well stocked place..........pick up some license plate screws, very well made with tamper proof screws and a special wrench for them. Excellent.

Pick up the BMW............no charge for the reinspection.............rear tires are balanced properly but are out of round. No charge for checking them as well. OK, order some replacment Yoko Avid EnVigors for the rear as well. Get them next week.

Head directly to DMV.

Arrive at 11:50 a.m. on a Friday and am prepared for the worst. Want to get both the Dodge titled and registered and the BMW registered (couldn't do it until it passed inspection). The paperwork is correct (they check it at the info desk), and the wait isn't bad at all..........maybe 20 minutes.

Get called at 12:20 and the BMW goes without incident............$160.

She doesn't want to register the van with passenger plates because "it doesn't have a second row seat in the back". I calmly explain that the law reads that it needs either a second row seat or a piece of permanent camping equipment such as a stove or a refrigerator or a bed. I explain that I have a permanent refrigerator installed............and, she reluctantly accepts it. $520. later (with the sales tax).............the Dodge is done.

I'm out the door at 12:30.

Off to Autozone and a battery for the van. They proffer a fairly decent battery for $104. OK.........I'll take it. "Oh, BTW, how much more is the Duralast Gold battery for the Dodge". Back on the screen.............it's $89.95. WTF.............moron cannot explain why. I'll take it.

Also get some Mobil-1 syn rear diff fluid for the van while I'm there. Most places don't carry it.

Go directly home. Arrival at 1:15. Grab a guick sandwich and go to work. Darkness is at 4:15.

Go to change oil in the van. The PO probably changed it 20K ago and I cannot budge the drain plug. I'm getting real close to rounding it and I realize that it's not happening. Go and get the torch and heat the plug............the hard plastic gasket starts to burn. Heat a bit more and try to avoid the plastic. Stop. Try the wrench again (have a six point box wrench!!)............nothing. Wait a minute or two...........try the wrench again and the damn thing moves with almost no effort. FANTASTIC. The plastic gasket is not harmed much at all. Finish the oil and filter. No need to lift the van to get to the filter...........it's got about 13" of ground clearance.

Go put the battery in the van. Drop one of the retaining bars and have to fish it out with the claw, but, otherwise goes OK. Nuts and bolts don't break and are not rusted away. Put the charger on the battery to bring it up to full voltage.

Put the stickers on the van and the BMW.

Put the plates on the van with the new screws.

The biggest job............replace the right side headlight assembly. This requires pulling the grille to get to the screws. A very poor design with all plastic pieces that don't play together very well. The headlight itself is held to the housing with three screws and another plastic piece that just pushes into the headlight. Not very secure at all. The accuracy of these parts is not great and some "adjustments" are required to get the marker "glass" to align and install to the headlight assembly. It goes without too much difficulty and the grill goes back on fine.

Not quite dark yet............pull out some grease and some silicone lube and get the big sliding door to work like it was brand new.

It's now 4:20............turn on the headlights and watch the new headlight beam converge on the left side headlight beam, about four feet to the left of where it should be. Some heavy adjustments to the brand new adjuster screws (the one and only adjustment that they can ever get), and the beam is now proper.

Leave the battery charger on overnight to ensure full charge.

I'm done.........the van is ready to go to NJ on Saturday morning to pick up some beautiful steel shelves for the van that I stole for $150 on CL.

As I mentioned, Paul, the world is now in balance.

Stoney · #8 12-05-2010, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim B.

I'll trade you all of that for a broken right leg and foot suffered as a result of a slip 'n' fall on unseen black ice on my driveway two weeks ago.
(estimated recovery date and full leg cast removal 2/11/11).

Deal or NO deal? ?

My sympathies. Broke both ankles this way 10 years ago when I slid on black ice into a construction excavation (no safety barrier) on the street in Manhattan, NYC.

Good thing was the contractor had tons of insurance and I didn't have to participate in any Xmas tree,snow shoveling, shopping BS.

Plus my boss let me telecommute.

Hope you get well soon!

suginami · #9 12-05-2010, 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim B.

I'll trade you all of that for a broken right leg and foot suffered as a result of a slip 'n' fall on unseen black ice on my driveway two weeks ago.
(estimated recovery date and full leg cast removal 2/11/11).

Deal or NO deal? ?

Sorry to hear that Jim. Hope you heal quickly. We missed you at the GTG yesterday.