The Gross Thread
 

Did you ever have a booger so long that it felt like it came from the back side of your brain? :D

Ever poop so much your pants fit better?

Ever walked out in the backyard barefoot on a warm summer morning, sleepy, and stepped on a fresh steaming dog doo that squished up between your toes?

Ever noticed how when you vomit scrambled eggs they look just like they did before you ate them?

Ever wake up to a partially digested animal your friends cat thought you would enjoy stepping on in the morning?

Yes I have my good sir. :)

That reminds me of an old saying. "She has scrambled eggs between her legs" :D:eek:

Ever get dragged through the "spring-barnyard-manure-swamp" by nothing more than a piece of binder-twine that's being used as a halter for a pony?

(I hate horses that take short-cuts...)

Ever get so wasted and puke and the beer was still cold? --- I have :D

yeah, then drink it again

Ever sat in a stall where the next person is trying to have Diarrhea Quietly in public and trying not to laugh at the squelching sounds?

Ever swallowed a toothbrush sideways and tried to explain the event to your better half?

Ever had Blue Waffles or a situation like this:

A horny guy went to the whorehouse and asked the madam how much the girls were.

Madam: Girls here are usually $100 a time but since it is slow, $80.
Man: What can I get for $5
Madam: I'm sorry sir but the best I can offer you is a Playboy magazine

Man goes away and hocks his shirt for $5
Man: Will you take $10 for a girl?
Madam: I'm sorry but I can't go that low. Best I can offer is the Playboy mag.

Man goes away and hocks his shoes for $10.
Man: I now have $20. Is it possible we can work something out?
Madam: That is going to be really difficult because that is way too low.

Man goes away and hocks his pants for $10
Man: Will $30 be workable?
Madam: Well, it is a slow night. Go See Marlene and knock on the door.

Man Knocks on the door and hears an elderly voice say "Come in" He opens the door and the lights were out but since he was horny, he said figured that he would give it a try. After going for a few minutes, he mentioned to her that it felt really rough there. She told him to stop and give her a few minutes. When she got back to bed, he went again and found it was the best he has had in a long time. After it was said and done, he asked her what she did to make it so good.

Marlene: Oh, not much. I scratched off the scabs and let the pus flow.

Pain Olympics. nuff said.

That site was hilarious. Thanx