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S and P Downgrades Iowa's IQ
AMES, IOWA (The Borowitz Report) – Calling the results of today's Iowa straw poll “alarming,” Standard and Poor’s took the unprecedented action of downgrading Iowa’s IQ.
While the effects of such an extraordinary measure are hard to predict, experts say the IQ downgrade could result in Iowans having difficulty completing sentences or operating a television remote. “This downgrade would be very upsetting to Republicans in Iowa,” said an S & P spokesman. “Fortunately, there’s no way they’ll understand it.” The winner in the straw poll, Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn), gave a rousing victory speech that was simulcast in English across the state. But there may be tough sledding ahead for Rep. Bachmann, as a new poll shows her losing support to Texas Governor Rick Perry among voters who describe themselves as morons. Gov. Perry kicked off his presidential campaign today in South Carolina, unveiling a new stump speech in which he promised to repeal the twentieth century.
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You're a daisy if you do. __________________________________ 84 Euro 240D 4spd. 220.5k sold 04 Honda Element AWD 1985 F150 XLT 4x4, 351W with 270k miles, hay hauler 1997 Suzuki Sidekick 4x4 1993 Toyota 4wd Pickup 226K and counting |
#2
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lol! The Onion?
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'07 Yukon 2500 '13 Subaru Outback 3.6R '13 Orbea Carpe 9-speed Currently Benzless Formerly: 300TD, S600, E55, 560SEL ---= The forest breathes, listen. -Native American elder |
#3
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dunno, somebody sent it to me. I suspect the Onion too.
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You're a daisy if you do. __________________________________ 84 Euro 240D 4spd. 220.5k sold 04 Honda Element AWD 1985 F150 XLT 4x4, 351W with 270k miles, hay hauler 1997 Suzuki Sidekick 4x4 1993 Toyota 4wd Pickup 226K and counting |
#4
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LOL
LOL LOL If they chose Bachmann this is a TRUE story.
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KLK, MCSE 1990 500SL I was always taught to respect my elders. I don't have to respect too many people anymore. |
#5
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Not the Onion. He's a humorist. Very clever. Here's another piece by him.
http://www.borowitzreport.com/2011/06/28/in-major-gaffe-bachmann-confuses-ass-hole-in-ground/
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62 220sb 67 250S 72 280SE 4.5 74 280C 77 300D 82 240D 85 190E 2.3 86 300E RIP 12/28/09 85 300SD 92 300D 2.5 00 E320 Current Over 1,000,000 miles in Benzes, Since66 ....and a whole passel of BMW 2002 and Tii |
#6
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what can i say? yep us iowans are a bunch of moron's obama won our last straw poll!
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#7
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The republican one?
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[SIGPIC] Diesel loving autocrossing grandpa Architect. 08 Dodge 3/4 ton with Cummins & six speed; I have had about 35 benzes. I have a 39 Studebaker Coupe Express pickup in which I have had installed a 617 turbo and a five speed manual.[SIGPIC] ..I also have a 427 Cobra replica with an aluminum chassis. |
#8
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d'oh guess i was thinking election.even at that he probably could have took mccain.
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