Are You an Ant or a Grasshopper? - PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum

Air&Road · #1 03-08-2012, 10:59 AM

Are you an Ant or a Grasshopper?

THE NEW ANT and the Grasshopper, Two Versions:

The ANT
AND THE
GRASSHOPPER

This one is a little different....
Two Different Versions ...
Two Different Morals

OLD VERSION

The antworks
hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper
thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm
and well fed.

The grasshopperhas
no food or shelter, so he
dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE OLD STORY:

Be responsible for yourself!

MODERN
VERSION

The ant works hard
in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house
and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopperthinks the ant
is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shiveringgrasshopper
calls a press conference and demands to know why the antshould be
allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN,
and ABC show up to
provide pictures of the shiveringgrasshopper
next to a video of the ant
in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poorgrasshopper
is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears
on Oprah
with the grasshopper
and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green...'

Occupy the Anthill stages
a demonstration in front of theant's
house where the news stations film the SEIU group singing, We shall overcome.

Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright
has the group kneel down to pray for the grasshopper's sake,

while he damns the ants.

President Obamacondemns the ant
and blames President Bush 43, President Bush 41, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the
Pope for the grasshopper's plight.

Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid
exclaim in an interview with Larry
Kingthat the ant has gotten rich off the back ofthe
grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the antto make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity &
Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of
the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number ofgreen bugsand, havingnothing left topay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by theGovernmentGreenCzar and givento thegrasshopper.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper
and his free-loadingfriends finishing up the last bits of theant'sfood while the government house he isin, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.

The ant hasdisappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.

The grasshopper is founddead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken
overby a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperousand peaceful, neighborhood.

The entire Nation collapses
bringing the rest
of the free world with it.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Be careful how you vote in 2012.

benhogan · #2 03-08-2012, 11:07 AM

I'm an ant in both versions.

I can't help it. I have envied and even tried to be a grasshopper but I keep coming back to being an ant.

Carleton Hughes · #3 03-08-2012, 11:19 AM

Neither I'm afraid. I think I'm either a grant or an asshopper.

BAVBMW · #4 03-08-2012, 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carleton Hughes

Neither I'm afraid. I think I'm either a grant or an asshopper.

...And we're done.

Thread over. Congratulations Mr. Hughes, Johnny, tell him what he's won!

MV

davidmash · #5 03-08-2012, 12:10 PM

I fail to see why it has to be an either/or answer? Insects are instinct driven species. Humans have the ability to adapt and compromise, or at least some of us can.

elchivito · #6 03-08-2012, 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by davidmash

I fail to see why it has to be an either/or answer? Insects are instinct driven species. Humans have the ability to adapt and compromise, or at least some of us can.

Insects go about their business. Humans too, and apparently part of their business is deciding which bug they are most like. Huh...

Brian Carlton · #7 03-08-2012, 12:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by elchivito

Insects go about their business. Humans too, and apparently part of their business is deciding which bug they are most like. Huh...

Apparently grasshoppers never suffer unemployment due to policies beyond their control.

Apparently grasshoppers never suffer health related disabilities that prevent them from behaving in similar manner to the ant.

The attitude of the ant is easy: fuk 'em.

It's nice to be black.

aklim · #8 03-08-2012, 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LarryBible

Be careful how you vote in 2012.

Ah but that is assuming there is a difference in the candidates. 10 to 1, it will be either a Republican or a Democrat in the WH. So what is the real difference between a Republicrat or a Demopublican? Besides the real action is going to be more in the congress.

Jim B. · #9 03-08-2012, 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LarryBible

Are you an Ant or a Grasshopper?

THE NEW ANT and the Grasshopper, Two Versions:

The ANT
AND THE
GRASSHOPPER

This one is a little different....
Two Different Versions ...
Two Different Morals

OLD VERSION

The antworks
hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper
thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm
and well fed.

The grasshopperhas
no food or shelter, so he
dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE OLD STORY:

Be responsible for yourself!

MODERN
VERSION

The ant works hard
in the withering heat and the rain all summer long, building his house
and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopperthinks the ant
is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shiveringgrasshopper
calls a press conference and demands to know why the antshould be
allowed to be warm and well fed while he is cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN,
and ABC show up to
provide pictures of the shiveringgrasshopper
next to a video of the ant
in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poorgrasshopper
is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears
on Oprah
with the grasshopper
and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green...'

Occupy the Anthill stages
a demonstration in front of theant's
house where the news stations film the SEIU group singing, We shall overcome.

Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright
has the group kneel down to pray for the grasshopper's sake,

while he damns the ants.

President Obamacondemns the ant
and blames President Bush 43, President Bush 41, President Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the
Pope for the grasshopper's plight.

Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid
exclaim in an interview with Larry
Kingthat the ant has gotten rich off the back ofthe
grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the antto make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity &
Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of
the summer.

The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number ofgreen bugsand, havingnothing left topay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by theGovernmentGreenCzar and givento thegrasshopper.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper
and his free-loadingfriends finishing up the last bits of theant'sfood while the government house he isin, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.

The ant hasdisappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.

The grasshopper is founddead in a drug related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken
overby a gang of spiders who terrorize the ramshackle, once prosperousand peaceful, neighborhood.

The entire Nation collapses
bringing the rest
of the free world with it.

MORAL OF THE STORY:

Be careful how you vote in 2012.

The above message is endorsed, paid for and brought to you courtesy of Substandard Oil, Exxon/Mobil, Wall Street, Big banks and Insurance companies, and their lobbyists, and of course, their well-bribed "elected" political stooges and nutjobs (and is approved by millions self styled, willfully ignorant, anti-intellectual "Conservatives" and "Christian" claques of wild-eyed religious fanatics) all of who are now firmly in control of the Republican Party.

Have a nice day.

Botnst · #10 03-08-2012, 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Carleton Hughes

Neither I'm afraid. I think I'm either a grant or an asshopper.

Asshopper ..... uh-oh.

aklim · #11 03-08-2012, 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim B.

The above message is endorsed, paid for and brought to you courtesy of Substandard Oil, Exxon/Mobil, Wall Street, Big banks and Insurance companies, and their lobbyists, and of course, their well-bribed "elected" political stooges and nutjobs (and is approved by milions self styled "Conservative" of "Christian" religious fanatics) all of who are now firmly in control of the Republican Party.

Have a nice day.

So my other choice is a candidate that receives no money from other sources that whisper in their ear about the direction to take? If so, that makes the choice simple. What party should that be?

Botnst · #12 03-08-2012, 01:07 PM

How about a hammer or a nail?

elchivito · #13 03-08-2012, 01:18 PM

Pinal County in my state has a Sheriff Asshopper. Relative?

aklim · #14 03-08-2012, 01:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Botnst

How about a hammer or a nail?

How about my favorite drink from Starbucks instead? Large cup with a dash of ice, 6 packs of sugar in the raw, filled with "Half and Half" and a double shot of Espresso?