You're Probably a Redneck if... - GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List

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This one's not exactly clean, but it always makes me laugh:

You may be a redneck if your mother doesn't take the cigarette out of her mouth as she tells the state trooper to kiss her a**.

Years ago, one of my co-workers gave me a Jeff Foxworthy calender page that said "You might be a redneck if.... Your wife and pickup are the same age."

Damn, he nailed it.....

54 wife, 54 Chevy 5 window stepside......

Jim

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14 E250 BlueTEC black. 45k miles
95 E320 Cabriolet Emerald green 66k miles
94 E320 Cabriolet Emerald green 152k miles
85 300TD 4 spd man, euro bumpers and lights, 15" Pentas dark blue 274k miles

Youre probably a redneck if you:

Mow your lawn and find a car...

you walk your kid to school every day because youre in the same grade...

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1984 300SD Orient Red/ Palomino
1989 560SEC
2016 Mazda 6 6 speed manual
1995 Ford F-150 reg cab 4.9 5speed manual

Hah! My situation is worse. My son and I ride the same bus (different stops) but he is a JUNIOR in college whereas I am just a FRESHMAN!:

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“Whatever story you're telling, it will be more interesting if, at the end you add, "and then everything burst into flames.”
― Brian P. Cleary, You Oughta Know By Now

What does that make you? Sub redneck?

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1984 300SD Orient Red/ Palomino
1989 560SEC
2016 Mazda 6 6 speed manual
1995 Ford F-150 reg cab 4.9 5speed manual