Kevin,
Thanks for your input. It could be because the SL is the Jenny Craig of the line (jock with six pack abs ). The SEL was just to fat for those shocks.

I now have the Koni shocks installed, and the car is finally stable and solid. I went with the middle stiffness adjustment. I am considering going to a higher firmness in the rear. For anyone considering these; they are great for handeling and control, but it is definately not a Cadillac ride. It is still smoother and quieter than our new Infiniti G20, but I doubt that some luxury people would approve.