For me personally its a tough call. I can understand where plant and botnest are coming from with the "dont ask dont tell question". I can see where the past should stay in the past.

At the same time though, i understand where virginia dude is coming from, people dont change. At least not overnight. once trust is compromised, there isnt much left in a relationship.

I knew of a few wifes, who has other guys "cum over", no pun intended, while the husband was at work. Later the husband found out that his wife was having an affair(s). I couldnt image the pain the husbands felt.

Just like the neurosurgon wife example with the nurse scrub, kind of...

Maybe for all us single guys out there, we have a subconscious trust issue?