My though has always been to get a two door Cadillac so I could have a Coupe de Ville.:P

nate- wouldn't it be nice if you could woo women with peanuts and banana peels?

Are you kidding?! Women wouldn't fall for that. The ones I know would insist on getting the banana. To hell with the PEELS!

Save a lot of $$$ on dating.

"Southern Fried, I say Southern Fried Chicken... Doncha hear me boy? That is one DUMB dawg!"

We had laying hens for probably around 30 winters through subzero weather and although production dropped somewhat from the one egg per chicken per day goal, they still did quite well without any heat. The key is light, and to a lesser degree, warm water. I can't remember what the lumen requirements are, but 16 hours or so a day of real, or adequate artificial light, keeps them productive.

Jim

THE CHICKEN BUSINESS

John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets', and ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs.

The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch, a very fine specimen he was, too. But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all! John went to investigate.

The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.

But to Farmer John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result...The judges not only awarded old Butch the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well.

Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making: who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.

Vote carefully, the bells are not allways ringing.......

These days if you have two roosters that happen to get in a fight in the yard, that's a felony.

Ken300D

It's enough to make you choke the chicken.

Hawhaw Bot's a chicken plucker!

Ohhhh noooooo.....

That is not what I heard about "Old Butch"......

The way I heard it was that Old Butch knew he was headed for the stew pot at his age so whenever a young rooster would show up in the hen yard he would challenge them thusly....."say there young fella, I have been the top rooster here for quite a while and I know you are very eager to begin the servicing of the hens but I hate to give up without a fight, so, I propose we settle it without shedding blood. I suggest we have a footrace, three laps around the chicken lot."

Well, the young rooster looks at the skinny limping old rooster who's plumage is getting disheveled and his comb is hanging off to one side with a rather crazy look in his beady red eye and thinks...."why I can run the legs off that old cock"....so the young rooster accepts the footrace challenge, congratulating himself on how smart he is.

So, off they go, and the old Butch immediately takes a lead of a several feet. os so. The young rooster thinks..."Wow that old cock can really run!"

And the young rooster steps up his effort! The second lap he cuts the lead down to two feet and halfway through the third lap he is right on the old Butch's tailfeathers.....

and....

Blam! Farmer Brown shoots the young rooster......and says....


"Dadblammn that Jones, thats the third queer rooster he has sent me this month!"



Any way, that's how I heard it.

OHHHHH, don't get me started....chicken jokes are my specialty.

Probably because of the chicken lot at my Grandpa's farm where I used to love gathering eggs and many times watched Grandpa butcher them for supper.

I am clearly scarred by the youthful experience!:P

Tom W

PS I seem to remember that Old Butch might have been a Leghorn.

PSS and although "Not that there is anything wrong with that" applies to humans, obviously when it comes to breeding chickens you want your cock to like hens!;)

Thank goodness I didn't have to know about that. In truth, I don't recall a decrease in production through our mild winters. I do recall that the broiler raisers in N. Louisiana lost profit margin when temps dropped. They had to maintain an optimal growth temp in the broiler houses otherwise the chickens' metabolism would go to warmth rather than growth. It worked on the other side of temp, too. When it got too warm they'd have to ventilate like crazy or the chickens would die from heat exhaustion.

OK, got it. Now my profit wheel is moving. Since there is no such thing as a stupid idea what do you thin of this:

"Farm in a box" Start a venture that will start a farm on a persons plot of land, put a package together with cows, chickens, goats, fencing, coups and maybe some add-ons like tilled planted gardens or go a step further with windmills for energy. There are many Gov programs that will finance for almost nothing or guarantee loans.

I think it could work in semi-suburban areas like mine.

Ther are so many middle-aged semi-successful middle level management or bureaucrat in the USA dreaming of owning a 5 acre ranchette that I think your farm-in-a-box has a heck of a good chance. That guy has to have what, $750K borrowing power? Probably already has $300K to $500K equity in the home he built for his wife & 2.5 kids. The kids are grown & gone but they might enjoy brining the grandkids to visit Grandmère et Grand-Père on the ranch.

Yip, its becoming a trend around here. They leave on a long weekend and come home to a min-farm or "gentleman's farm"

and do a USDA starting farmer package for the less fortunate or laid off auto workers,