I think I could handle the stay at home dad thing. - PeachParts Mercedes-Benz Forum

Medmech · #1 08-25-2008, 10:44 AM

Wifey has been working on a house rehab adventure with her mom so I have been weekending with the kids and have noticed a few things, especially since its Monday and I'm back at the office.

1. I get to be with my kids

2. If I stay home there is a 100% chance that I don't have to be nice to people I don't like. ---
3. Going for walks at the park with the kids is a good time killer and good fun. win-win

4. Fishing in my pond is work but its better than my job.

5. When school starts I can hang out with the hot mom's.

and much much more, if wifey can land a decent job I can stay at home and peddle some RE on the side, too be honest I think I did much better hangin loose and wheelin and dealin rather than my current suit tie, office scenario.

SwampYankee · #2 08-25-2008, 11:00 AM

I'm fine with weekending, I'm not sure I could do it the other 5 days. I don't know how my wife does it and keeps everything straight. No matter how hectic it can get at work during our busy season, it's still alot easier for me to deal with work. Maybe it's just a quantity thing in my case.

Chad seems to handle it pretty well.

Dee8go · #3 08-25-2008, 11:08 AM

Mine are pretty much grown and the last one will be gone soon. I could definitely get into the "stayin' at home and goofin' off" part, though.

Since when is fishing work? You must be doing something wrong, Howie.

Medmech · #4 08-25-2008, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dee8go

Since when is fishing work? You must be doing something wrong, Howie.

Teaching my 6 year old how to fly fish with her 3 year old brother running around is work, additionally we have a lot of fish so there is never a dull moment.

Its good work though.

Zeus · #5 08-25-2008, 11:26 AM

lol Howie, I'm kind of in the same spot. Wife just accepted a job and we're moving (within Ontario, not the US though). Got a nice estate property, lots of room and fun stuff for the kids - pool, play structure, etc. Challenge for me is do I keep working or should I stay home for a few years with the boys? Oldest is just starting school (he's 4) and the youngest is 1.5. Youngest is easy to handle compared to No.1, lol. So, I'm also debating the stay-at-home Dad thing.

Doesn't come naturally to me though, I'm a workaholic I think and I have the 'Dad should provide' stereotype ingrained in me.

On the other hand, I've paid the bills for over 15 years since we've been together and she was going through med school and residency...so one might say I've done my share and can now take a few years off. Maybe start a new venture once they are both in school...

Hmmm...

Mistress · #6 08-25-2008, 11:27 AM

How- we're behind you 100% no matter what your decision. Have you seen that movie with Michael Keaton "Mr. Mom." it's pretty funny. Also someone did a study and found out kids raised by their fathers tended to be alittle more stable and not so reactive to certain situations and less nervous.

G-Benz · #7 08-25-2008, 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mistress

...someone did a study and found out kids raised by their fathers tended to be a little more stable and not so reactive to certain situations and less nervous...

Yeah, but how did the fathers turn out?

Mine's never at home much anyway at her age, but am still engaged in her many in and out-of-school events. Being at home doesn't provide much advantage for me except to finally answer and get rid of those stupid phone callers I see on the caller ID.

But we're rooting for ya Howie!

Dee8go · #8 08-25-2008, 12:37 PM

You're a very involved father, Gee. There seem to be a large number of great dads on this forum. It appears that your daughter has benefited mightily from all of your attention.

Mike D · #9 08-25-2008, 12:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mistress

How- we're behind you 100% no matter what your decision. Have you seen that movie with Michael Keaton "Mr. Mom." it's pretty funny. Also someone did a study and found out kids raised by their fathers tended to be alittle more stable and not so reactive to certain situations and less nervous.

Gotta be one of the funniest lines I ever heard in a movie.

Michael trying to impress Martin Mull with his "manliness" around the house, holding a chainsaw and responding to Martin's question regarding electrical wiring, "220, 221, whatever it takes"

Kuan · #10 08-25-2008, 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by G-Benz

Yeah, but how did the fathers turn out?

Nucking Futs!

It's a great gig, but sometimes I sound like Mr. Rogers. Sometimes you just need to talk to grownups.

Dee8go · #11 08-25-2008, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Howitzer

Teaching my 6 year old how to fly fish with her 3 year old brother running around is work, additionally we have a lot of fish so there is never a dull moment.

Its good work though.

You're right. That DOES sound a lot more like work when you put it like THAT.

aklim · #12 08-25-2008, 01:08 PM

Lost my job, came home mad
Got a hug and kiss and that's too bad
She said I can go to work until you find another job
I thought I like the sound of that
Watch TV and take long naps
Go from a hand working dad to being Mr. Mom

Well
Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer
Crayons go up one drawer higher
Rewind Barney for the fifteenth time
Breakfast, six naps at nine
There's bubble gum in the baby's hair
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
Been crazy all day long and it's only Monday
Mr. Mom

Football, soccer and ballet
Squeeze in Scouts and PTA
And there's that shopping list she left
That's seven pages long
How much smoke can one stove make
The kids won't eat my charcoal cake
It's more than any maid can take
Being Mr. Mom

Well
Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer
Crayons go up one drawer higher
Rewind Barney for the sixteenth time
Breakfast, six naps at nine
There's bubble gum in the baby's hair
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
Been crazy all day long and it's only Monday
Mr.Mom

Before I fall in bed tonight
If the dog didn't eat the classifieds
I'm gonna look just one more time

'Cause
Pampers melt in a Maytag dryer
Crayons go up one drawer higher
Rewind Barney for the eighteenth time
Breakfast, six naps at nine
There's bubble gum in the baby's hair
Sweet potatoes in my lazy chair
Been crazy all day long
Oh been crazy all day long and it's only Monday
Mr.Mom

Balancin' checkbooks, juggling bills
Thought there was nothing to it
Baby, now I know how you feel
What I don't know is how you do it

Well, it is all you say except for a couple of minor details that you forgot to mention. What happens if something does go wrong with wifey? I'm assuming you are financially covered if she passes on. However, say she decides to step out on you, where does that leave you? If she decides to say "I'm the major breadwinner here, blah, blah, blah", where does that leave you? I'm not saying it will happen but I have seen it happen more than once.

jlomon · #13 08-25-2008, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike D

Gotta be one of the funniest lines I ever heard in a movie.

Michael trying to impress Martin Mull with his "manliness" around the house, holding a chainsaw and responding to Martin's question regarding electrical wiring, "220, 221, whatever it takes"

The follow-up line is even better.

Keaton: "you want a beer?"
Mull: "it's 7 in the morning!"
Keaton: "scotch?"

I just finished a 3 week "Mr. Mom" stint at home with my soon to be 3 year old son. He damn near ran me ragged and I don't think I've been that tired since he was a newborn. Having been back at work for the past week, I'd much rather be with him again. I know just what you're going through, Howie.

Chad300tdt · #14 08-25-2008, 01:25 PM

It's definitely a great thing being able to see your kids all day, but it's not as easy as most people think.

The fact that I know how to repair and upgrade everything in our house and cook, has been a tremendous benefit. We are saving loads of money over when we both were working and our house is still progressing steadily. Plus somebody else isn't raising our kids.

I'm also able to get around to working on the wagon and do freelance jobs for extra cash here and there. The freelance work helps keep me in touch with my business contacts.

It does get tiring if you don't have any "adult" outlets. Dealing with kids all day can make you a little crazy. Hanging out with adults other than your wife is amazing therapy.

I've mentioned before that there have been benefits to me that I didn't expect as well. I've gained patience and understanding and the ability to explain things more clearly.

Good luck if you decide to stay at home with your kids.

I've encountered a few people with attitudes about SAHDs, but I really don't care what those people think. Most people I talk with think it's great and wish they could do the same thing.

I'm not worried about the scenario Aklim brings up, because my wife and I are partners in everything. We talk about any issues we have, deal with them and grow in our marriage. Having kids brought us closer together. If you don't communicate with each other and let problems fester, you should worry whether you are a SAHD or not.

If you keep doing RE stuff while you're at home, you'd be keeping yourself in the business and maintaining contacts and don't have to worry about jumping back in full time if need be.