Anyone ever try online dating?
 

I am now in a position to consider female companionship in the near future. My son no longer needs my daily guidance and my work will permit it. Plus, it's time to do something for me. :D

The bar scene in Deytroit is not a viable option neither is spending time lurking on college campuses.

There are a number of sites, so please pass any anecdotes, hints, suggestions etc. I am kinda serious about this and I don't want this thread hi-jacked for some other purpose.

Am looking to get some solid advice from anyone who has done this or prefers to give the advice by saying " I know this person who...etc etc etc." ;)

I am not only asking for the wisdom of my confreres but also of my consoeurs, so ladies, please feel free to advise me.

All advice will be accepted except that of mail order brides from Estonia, no matter how earnest their expression and tight their dress is.

Thanks... I think, lol. :)

Jeezuz man, you must really be on the mend.

If I made my wife type this- would you pay more attention ? =)
Dont worry about women, if you want to give yourself a gift, buy a mercedes SL in good shape- even a cheap mercedes is cheaper than a woman. Take the time that you would spend dating/meeting someone to do some**thing**. Something like volunteering, ballroom dancing (lots of women there...), fixing stuff, community theatre, MBCA(?), tutoring/mentoring, local parks....
If you go out looking for "a woman" - thats exactly what you'll find - just a woman. If you spend your time doing something special, you WILL find someone special.

That being said, my best friend met his now-wife on eharmony, they have a 2 yr old and have been married 3 years or so by now....(they married after dating for 9mo...)

-John

OR someone. :D

Online dating is really a misnomer. Basically it is a "weeding out" service, if you will. For example, if I am a devout catholic and she is an atheist, why go thru a date or two to find that out? The online services will have weeded her out of consideration so I don't waste my time. Also why bother to ask her out and all that if she is already taken or might not be wanting to date? Time saver is all it is.

How old are you? I know some people who did/do it. They are in their mid 20s.

I'm not sure what age has to do with it other than the older generation is not as comfortable with a computer helping them select.

I haven't found a woman that I want to be my wife trough online dating... However, I found some that became cool friends that I like a lot. We hang out and do stuff together... Go to the other for advice, etc...
Avoid the mail order bride type of sites.... Most are broilerroom scams... One of my friends from ukraine worked in one of those situations...
If you want to meet someone for a foreign country, go to ICQ, and use the search feature where you punch in an age range and a country.... You'll get maybe one out of 10 that will be your friend... If they take a real interest in you, they'll try to play matchmaker... One thing I noticed about the girls that you do this with from the former USSR, they really try to help you find your other half....
Just my history as asked for...

Just make sure to be yourself.

Met my wife on Match.com

Dated for 2 yrs and married for 5. As much as I hate to agree with Aklim on anything, he is right about online dating. It is a good way to sort through people who are not a match. You can talk to them on line and on the phone before meeting and see if it is worth the effort or not.

I am not a party goer and work kept me pretty occupied this was a convenient way to meet someone. Not for everyone but I would give it a try. Just keep in mind, it may take a few frogs before you fine the one you want. So don't give up after one bad apple

Thank you very much. The wife has constantly ridiculed it and thinks it cannot work.

Why? Do you have to disagree with me on everything since we disagreed on a couple of things?

www.okcupid.com

Free

Like I mentioned in your other thread I met my wife on Myspace.
Honestly I wasn't really looking for anyone though. I just thought it would be a good way to keep in touch with my children. Next thing I know I'm getting letters from tons of women.
But you have to be careful, a lot of people lie a lot about themselves.

Danny

Met mine on Match.com.

Aklim is right it helps weed out the 'wrong ones' and let's you concentrate on the ones that you find interesting.

Match also seems to weed out the scammers who 'really need some help getting out of Nigeria and back to the USA since they were taken to Lagos and abandoned by their old boyfriend':rolleyes:


The funny thing is I have met more women on Face Book than anywhere else. I have become friends with a few and have three new adopted sisters:D

My advice may not apply.

I am getting started with this. The "weeding out" process is endless, fascinating.

This seems to be pretty much socially accepted to do nowadays.

A fascinating discussion board on this issue is eharmony.advice which is free, and I went to that one, and actually met real people in person there, all of whom are single and looking, and actually dated some and made a lot of friends of both genders too in the process.

A lot of REALLY good people are out there, but it is basically a numbers game with many people "poofing" (disappearing without a trace, on you)

EHarmony, and Match are the biggest paid ones. Plenty of Fish is free.


Try them, you never know. You can really meet interesting people. Works for ANY adult age. Just use some common sense and keep your wits about you.

Most of the females are divorced, and most of them have children, whether in or out of the house. A sprinkling of widows and never-married ones also.


If you sign up for them, ALWAYS include at least one good recent face picture, or else your response is close to zero. If you contact anyone, they will read your profile FIRST before they do anything, so make it interesting and unique.

I'd go for a younger one who hasn't been divorced and minus the kids. why? face it, they have "baggage" and might have an ex who still lurks in the background. the ex might be understanding, but then again, he might not be. I've noticed that some divorced women have a positive attitude about their ex while their ex may not share the same sentiment. the woman thinks everything is "cool" while the ex is still emotionally attached to his ex-wife and may exhibit jealous tendencies. and there YOU are getting in the middle of it. no thanks, give me a 20 something with no baggage, plus you can train her right.

I'd rather deal with baggage than a 20something nitwit who can't carry a conversation. My wife came to the table with 4 kids and a dip**** x-husband who I have come to an understanding with...he leaves me alone, I leave him alone. We're not friends, but he has calmed way down.

Anyway, I met my wife in an online group for parents of kids on the autistic spectrum, so we had an automatic point of commonality, although having TWO autistic kids in a household can be interesting.

Have fun with it, see where it goes. You might get laid, you might make a friend, you might find a long term thing.

Online dating is a great way to meet someone. Pictures are the key. Make sure they are recent and of decent quality. You may want to consider getting a Facebook page. Single women scour those things to look for a potential date. The match.com types of sites can also be fine but they cost you money.

I met my wife (well soon to be, we are getting married in less than two weeks) online. Believe it or not I met her on Craigslist. She was new in town and had a pair of Vikings tickets from a coworker and really didn't know anybody so she put an ad on the platonic section. I figured the worst-case scenario was I'd drink a few beers and make fun of Packer fans :D (Vikes/Packers game).

My advice, go for it.

All the women I have dated over the Internet stayed with me for good. My dog disinterrs them occasionally, finding the occasional femur or jawbone he has drug about the yard is getting annoying.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say women over their mid-twenties don't want to date you, not the other way around. They can see right through your facade.

'You can train her right.' Yep, that is what marriage/relationship is all about! :rolleyes: Her doing exactly what I want.

Back when it was more fashionable (12 years ago now), I met my Ukrainian wife online. I got lucky and found an honest one. YMMV-big time.

Rick

watch when you step out on a limb, someone might shake the tree. since you may not be in possession of information concerning my personal situation, you might be "making an assumption" AKA "shooting in the dark". both instances are usually incorrect due to lack of personal knowledge.

now that we've cleared that up, onto the subject at hand:

granted there are some relationships where the man brings four kids and new wife brings four kids to the table that succeed. that is great for those that can make it work.

these are people who previously emotionally bonded to their ex and in my experience that bond never completely "evaporates". the kids still think of new daddy as "step father" and their real father as "real father". hard to compete with that.

and, having lived and been around most parts of these United States, there are certain geographical areas I've placed a big X magic marker "Do not even think about these areas" warning sign on my love map. something in the drinking water turns women from those areas into certified nut cases as far as I'm concerned. and no, I'm not going to name those geographical areas on this forum. I've experienced it first hand by living and breathing in those markets. they can keep it.

met my wife in a yahoo chat room.been married five years next month and never regretted it for a minute .online is just like anything else you gotta weed out the ones that wont work for you and make some good friends in the process.

I see no reason why it should not apply, do you?

Don't do it!!!

I dated 3 women I found on E-Harmony before marrying my 2nd wife. The other 2 were nuts from the start! I wish I had never tried dating that way.

She started showing signs of going crazy after 4 months of marriage, but I stayed the course and decided to try to make it work. After 2 years with this nut job, I told her it was time for her to leave.

The following night, my house burned to the ground and my youngest daughter spent 19 days in the hospital from smoke inhalation.

She is now spending time in Ohio's custody for arson and attempted murder.

Run like hell and don't date those from the internet...They are nuts!!!

IMO, there is always weeding out. After all, if I am agnostic and I meet a girl I am interested in but find out 3 dates later that religion is a huge part of her life and any mate must adopt her religion, that is 3 dates I have wasted. Money, time and effort. Either way, you are weeding them out. One is quicker than the other. If in her profile she states that she are extremely religious and I see it, I'll pass on it just like I would pass on her after I date her once or twice. After all it would take me no less than a date to figure it out. This way, I save the money and time.

Depends on the divorce sitiation. If the girl has been divorced 4 or 5 times, that is a red flag. Now once divorced you can say that she has made a stupid mistake of marrying the kid out of her HS class. Several times and you are divorced? Maybe it is YOU that is the problem.

Yes with kids you are always attached to the ex no matter how you play it unless he dies or you adopt the kids. Way too much baggage for me to deal with.

I assume you met her once or twice before you got married right? The fact that you met her on line has nothing to do with the fact that she was/is nuts and tried to kill you. Had you met her in a bar or nightclub she could have deceived you just as easily.

The main advantage of the internet is you can cast a broader net. You get exposed to substantially more people and increase your likely hood of meeting someone. You still have to check them out. Like buying a car. Internet gives you more options but your still have to do a PPI and check it out before buying.

Sorry you had a bad experience and I am glad you and your daughter are ok.

I've been giving situations like this a LOT of thought lately. nowadays, when someone applies for a job, usually a drug screening along with a criminal background check is performed. HOWEVER, there are certified nut jobs who can still slip through the cracks due to the fact that some psycho and sociopaths are near geniuses and know how to answer the interviewer's questions correctly. an item which sometimes is left out of the hiring process is a complete and thorough pscyhologcial screening. granted one cannot weed out all socio and psychopaths but one can at least try. It is known as 'performing due diligence'.

there are a number of companies that are now offering this service to employers and employment agencies and it appears to be beneficial. by the time you marry 'em, hire 'em or enter into any type of relationship with 'em it may be too late. I think the term is known as 'Pre-screening' X10.

Ouch sorry to hear that

Internet Dating
 

I have not had any luck on this site.

This is a car board frequented by guys mostly or at least more guys than girls. Assuming you are male, if you are gay, it could work.

lol

Oh, I forgot, if he "drives on both sides of the road" it might work too. :D

I would think Facebook would be a good site, but you might get bombarded with your old High school classmates from years ago wanting to rehash old times.

yeah I have an account and people from high school and old colleges bombard me to rehash old times which I am not interested in doing

Angel- I know some pretty cheap women.....and I do like the idea of buying the SL....I'd stay away from Craigslist....

Really?? :D:D

Yes. Younger women are looking for different things than older women. I could give advice on how to pick up early to mid 20's chicks on match, but I doubt it would be much help if strelnik's in his 50's. Unless he's looking for a mid life crisis trophy chick :D.

Oh, like you had to ask?

I am!!!!! :D:D

Hoping you leave some names here

there is no such thing as "mid-life crisis" it's High School With Money when your in your 50's....

around 15 years ago or so, a good friend went through a real nasty long drawn out EXPENSIVE divorce. he swore he would never ever marry again. about five years post divorce, I receive a wedding invitation from him. now, he complains the new 'trophy wife' is dumber than a box of rocks. I'd just as soon rent one than own one.

The last time I tried online dating, I was using a 9600 Baud Hayes Smartmodem and a Prodigy online account. :cool:

Could be she is playing possum and going to do him in for the big score.

Too bad Paul McCartney didn't think that way. http://sarcatrist.wordpress.com/

that is so it. being a musician, I really felt a lot of empathy for Paul McCartney. talk about getting his clock cleaned. it sure appeared like she set him up for a hard fall.

"Had Paul McCartney ‘employed’ Kristen for 5 years, he would’ve paid $7.3 million for an hour of sex every night for 5 years (a saving of $41.7 million). Now you decide, Is owning better or Renting!!"

I"ll bet his accountant would agree........

Mistress,

Pls feel free to send me a list.

BTW I may be angling for a 380SL that a 70-plus owner may not want. After I sell the extra diesels and Citroens, I would have more room, more cash and something to play with...er if I buy the 380SL. He's looking at 4,000 and it has no rust but some fuel delivery problems and starting problems.

Pls feel free to continue your comments.

I have tried the 26 year old set previously and they are not intellectually challenging enough for me. I get bored. Plus, after an hour or two of vigorous conjunctive activity, they get winded...no one exercises any more.... :(

I only drive on the straight road and avoid dead ends. Hope that clears any uncertainty.

One of my best friends prefers to date Korean or Chinese women (he was married to a very pretty Korean woman who passed away after a long bout with cancer). He states he gets the best results on Match.com.