| AdvisorGuy |
05-05-2010 05:13 PM |
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kuan
(Post 2461863)
Do gay people know who is gay and who isn't? Did anybody know this guy was gay? Surely his partners did.
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Well you'd be surprised how good some of the "Down-Low" guys are about keeping it "down-low." This guy, Larry Craig and the likes didn't just have the one instance in their lives that "outed" them. They've been doing it for decades. I'd say the signs were probably there - middle-aged plus, never married or single (this can apply to men and women). But then again, some in the 40+ age group even went so far as to get married and even have kids.
I know one guy that is 64. He came out at 50, previously married and a daughter in her mid-twenties. A woman I go to school with asked me to lunch one day to discuss her situation. Late 50's and divorced after 28 years of marriage and two kids. He just left. Turns out a year later, she finds out he was gay. She had "no clue" but after a few questions on my part, she recalls the "walks around the lake after dinner with 'Bob' that lasted 'til after dark'." Also the occasional finding of, for lack of a better word, "feminine-brand" cigarettes in his car: "I'm an indiscriminate smoker, honey. I don't care what brand they are. I just grab the closest ones on the counter."
Then there's a guy like me. By no means a feminine or "fabulous" guy. Worked with cars in some form most of my life. Not a sharp dresser on a regular basis but certainly clean up VERY well. Started to come to terms with myself ten years ago at 33. Met my current partner a year later and told my friends & family (only my sister really) that we were "roommates." Three years in, he couldn't deal with my insecurities & fears so he left. Admittedly I cracked. I let the best thing that ever happened to me, walk out. The first person I told was my best friend of now 23 years: "Greg, 'Rob' and I are more than roommates." "Duh, no **** *******. We've all known since the first time we saw you two together and were just waiting for YOU to be comfortable enough to say something to us." I'm still god father to their two kids and we're still closer than I am with my own brother (had nothing to do with this) whom I have not seen nor spoken to in 20 years. "Paula" and I are still best friends after knowing each other for 25 years and even having been "romantically involved" for about 18 months in the mid-nineties.
A current neighbor told me a year ago that she had no clue about me & my partner until that point - which was about a year here. " Seeing you two makes me wonder how many people I know or met, guy or girl, that ARE gay." Meaning that we don't fit the neat little stereotype of being "fabulous" and partiers. As Joe Walsh said, just an "ordinary average guy."
You all probably know or are related to someone like this - male or female.. ;)
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