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#1
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This Really Stinks!
Enough of the stinky political threads already.
How about a stinky cheese thread? Personaly I love a cheese that bites back. The stinkier and with a hard bite the better. My favorites: St Albans, the stinkiest, the winner! Stilton, stinky with terrific bite, I love it! Limburger, though a touch too salty sometimes. Gruyere, a stinky hard cheese with a hint of a nutty naste, just delightfull. jump on in stinkers!
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Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. Calvin Coolidge (1872 - 1933) |
#2
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Howdy All,
I mostly like mild cheeses. The one stinky cheese I enjoy is when I cut-the-cheese Love to watch the paint peel off the walls But watch out when the dogs cut-the-cheese, that will make your eyes water and warp 2x4s
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Frank X. Morris 17 Kia Niro 08 Jeep Wrangler 4 door unlimited |
#3
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Quote:
or do I?
__________________
Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. Calvin Coolidge (1872 - 1933) |
#4
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The Cheese Shop Sketch from "The Instant Monty Python Record Collection"
(a customer walks in the door.) Customer: Good Morning. Owner: Good morning, Sir. Welcome to the National Cheese Emporium! Customer: Ah, thank you, my good man. Owner: What can I do for you, Sir? C: Well, I was, uh, sitting in the public library on Thurmon Street just now, skimming through "Rogue Herrys" by Hugh Walpole, and I suddenly came over all peckish. O: Peckish, sir? C: Esuriant. O: Eh? C: 'Ee, Ah wor 'ungry-loike! O: Ah, hungry! C: In a nutshell. And I thought to myself, "a little fermented curd will do the trick," so, I curtailed my Walpoling activites, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles! O: Come again? C: I want to buy some cheese. O: Oh, I thought you were complaining about the bazouki player! C: Oh, heaven forbid: I am one who delights in all manifestations of the Terpsichorean muse! O: Sorry? C: 'Ooo, Ah lahk a nice tuune, 'yer forced too! O: So he can go on playing, can he? C: Most certainly! Now then, some cheese please, my good man. O: (lustily) Certainly, sir. What would you like? C: Well, eh, how about a little red Leicester. O: I'm, a-fraid we're fresh out of red Leicester, sir. C: Oh, never mind, how are you on Tilsit? O: I'm afraid we never have that at the end of the week, sir, we get it fresh on Monday. C: Tish tish. No matter. Well, stout yeoman, four ounces of Caerphilly, if you please. O: Ah! It's beeeen on order, sir, for two weeks. Was expecting it this morning. C: 'T's Not my lucky day, is it? Aah, Bel Paese? O: Sorry, sir. C: Red Windsor? O: Normally, sir, yes. Today the van broke down. C: Ah. Stilton? O: Sorry. C: Ementhal? Gruyere? O: No. C: Any Norweigan Jarlsburg, per chance. O: No. C: Lipta? O: No. C: Lancashire? O: No. C: White Stilton? O: No. C: Danish Brew? O: No. C: Double Goucester? O: C: Cheshire? O: No. C: Dorset Bluveny? O: No. C: Brie, Roquefort, Pol le Veq, Port Salut, Savoy Aire, Saint Paulin, Carrier de lest, Bres Bleu, Bruson? O: No. C: Camenbert, perhaps? O: Ah! We have Camenbert, yessir. C: (suprised) You do! Excellent. O: Yessir. It's..ah,.....it's a bit runny... C: Oh, I like it runny. O: Well,.. It's very runny, actually, sir. C: No matter. Fetch hither the fromage de la Belle France! Mmmwah! O: I...think it's a bit runnier than you'll like it, sir. C: I don't care how ****ing runny it is. Hand it over with all speed. O: Oooooooooohhh........! C: What now? O: The cat's eaten it. C: O: She, sir. (pause) C: Gouda? O: No. C: Edam? O: No. C: Case Ness? O: No. C: Smoked Austrian? O: No. C: Japanese Sage Darby? O: No, sir. C: You...do *have* some cheese, don't you? O: (brightly) Of course, sir. It's a cheese shop, sir. We've got-- C: No no... don't tell me. I'm keen to guess. O: Fair enough. C: Uuuuuh, Wensleydale. O: Yes? C: Ah, well, I'll have some of that! O: Oh! I thought you were talking to me, sir. Mister Wensleydale, that's my name. (pause) C: Greek Feta? O: Uh, not as such. C: Uuh, Gorgonzola? O: no C: Parmesan, O: no C: Mozarella, O: no C: Paper Cramer, O: no C: Danish Bimbo, O: no C: Czech sheep's milk, O: no C: Venezuelan Beaver Cheese? O: Not *today*, sir, no. (pause) C: Aah, how about Cheddar? O: Well, we don't get much call for it around here, sir. C: Not much ca--It's the single most popular cheese in the world! O: Not 'round here, sir. C: O: 'Illchester, sir. C: IS it. O: Oh, yes, it's staggeringly popular in this manor, squire. C: Is it. O: It's our number one best seller, sir! C: I see. Uuh...'Illchester, eh? O: Right, sir. C: All right. Okay. 'Have you got any?' he asked, expecting the answer 'no'. O: I'll have a look, sir... nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno. C: It's not much of a cheese shop, is it? O: Finest in the district! C: (annoyed) Explain the logic underlying that conclusion, please. O: Well, it's so clean, sir! C: It's certainly uncontaminated by cheese.... O: (brightly) You haven't asked me about Limburger, sir. C: Would it be worth it? O: Could be.... C: Have you --SHUT THAT BLOODY BAZOUKI OFF! O: Told you sir.... C: (slowly) Have you got any Limburger? O: No. C: Figures. Predictable, really I suppose. It was an act of purest optimism to have posed the question in the first place. Tell me: O: Yessir? C: (deliberately) Have you in fact got any cheese here at all. O: Yes,sir. C: Really? (pause) O: No. Not really, sir. C: You haven't. O: Nosir. Not a scrap. I was deliberately wasting your time,sir. C: Well I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to shoot you. O: Right-0, sir. The customer takes out a gun and shoots the owner. C: What a *senseless* waste of human life. |
#5
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hahaha pretty uncheesy!
__________________
Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. Calvin Coolidge (1872 - 1933) |
#6
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Howdy axlechassis,
If you live east of Cal. you might be in trouble. Next time you smell something weird it might not be the old sewage plant
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Frank X. Morris 17 Kia Niro 08 Jeep Wrangler 4 door unlimited |
#7
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yep I reckon I'm in trouble!:p
By the way a good stinky cheese is very good for you. Good for the digestion lots of friendly bacteria. Very good source of digestable calcium. Good for boners and teeth.
__________________
Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. Calvin Coolidge (1872 - 1933) |
#8
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Howdy axlechassis,
Does a stinky cheese have more friendly bacteria than the mild cheese?¿
__________________
Frank X. Morris 17 Kia Niro 08 Jeep Wrangler 4 door unlimited |
#9
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Quote:
__________________
Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. Calvin Coolidge (1872 - 1933) |
#10
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No stinky cheese here, it's one the few things I just can't get down without wanting to puke. Mountain oysters, pig knuckles cow tongue...no problem but stinky cheese immediate pukage.
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