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Originally Posted by raymr
Also, place all your PCs in the common areas of the house so you can keep an eye on online activity, i.e. no bedroom internet for the youngsters.
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This is good advice, but it does not always work.
I prosecuted an Internet child molester who was arranging a meeting with a 14 yo girl. The perp was 40 and he himself had a 13 yo daughter.
In any event, the victim's parents had placed the PC in a common area of the home (out in a hallway). this, owever, did not keep the girl from engaging in cybersex wiht the perp.
The case came to light when the girl's mother found evidence of the "convos" (converstions/chats) between the perp and her daughter. The girl had saved all the convos to disk and then printed them. While she was away at Bible summer camp her mom wnet through her things and found the binder with all the convos, neatly printed out.
The mom went straight to the police department and a sting operation was set up to catch the perp. When the cops busted him he had condoms in his car and the girl's home address in his shirt pocket (he was planning to meet her).
He was arrested and prosecuted. years later he violated his terms of probation when he was arrested sitting in his car at a park, frequented by children. Guess what he was carrying in his car...a fresh carton of condoms.
When I interviewed the girl to get her ready for tiral (he pled before trial) I asked her how was it possible for her to engage in heavy cybersex while the computer was ou ton the hallway, where her parents and siblings could see her. She told me that she never did any of the things (roleplaying) that she supposedly was engaging in. She said that she was only pretending to be cybering with the perp. I asked her why?
She told me she was bored AND lonely and if she did not go along wiht the cybering he would not chat with her.
That was the saddest thing I've heard a 14 yo child say. It broke my heart.
The point is that yes, keeping the computer in a public place of the home is important, but as parents don't be afraid to "spy" on your kids. So many parents want to respect their kids' privacy -- that's exactly what predators are counting on!
Also, please talk to your kids, watch for mood changes, don't assume anything, even if all you get are one-syllable answers from your kids, don't stop talking to them. Spend time with your kids.
And above all, don't be a phony with your kids. Kids can spot parental BS a mile away. Don't tell kids that drinking is bad and then proceed to get s**t faced on the weekends. Don't preach to kids about the dangers of smoking and then proceed to chain smoke at home. Don't tell kids about obeying the law and then proceed to drive at 80 mph as your drive them to school.
The predators that are actually caught and prosecuted are only a miniscule portion of all the predators out there. They want our kids, don't let them win.