it was the heat exchanger / water tank heater
the black plastic portion of it, has what appears to be a seal/w spring that whole thing came apart. so the coolant was indeed ending up in the water tank. anybody have any suggestions on where I can get a piece of steel tube? so i can bypass the water tank heater? no sense of spending 156 when summer is coming along, and i do not live on a climate where water freezes. (at least yet).
I did purchase an OEM water tank, its the same # as the old one but it doesnt seem to fit correctly
and to top it off (plastic is brittle so the connector of one of the washer pumps just crumble) so now I need or maybe that can wait too... (its for the one that was leaking.. hose goes to the headlamp wipers