Well, after 3 trips to the shop, it is working properly now, and what was done, basically, was replace leaky modulator, replace broken VCV,(very expensive!!), and finally re-route some vacuum lines in a way that now, the line going to the modulator tees off the TOP of the VCV, my head is still trying to see exactly what actually happened, and I don't know why it was so screwed up to start with, since I just bought it, but it does shift really nicely now, and I'm about as happy as can be.
Many thanks to all who participated in this mess, with the real fix being a combination of almost all your suggestions, you're all great in my book!!
Now, what is the most common cause of the heater not getting HOT when driving, but HOT when sitting and idling??