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"Your worst diagnosis?"
I thought this post is your 'dim wit worst' diagnostics, not the dealer's/garage's diagnostics. I rarely take my cars to the dealer as they all have big boat payments and would like to fleece you if they could get away with it. I am not saying there are no honest dealers/mechanics but they are few in far between.
Case in point: Bought my 83 300D with a knocking sound, 1 owner car. The owner said the dealer wanted $8000 for a new engine. It was too expensive and they decided to part with this family treasure. I bought it for $700, not knowing anything about diesel as I was a newbie then. I asked around and my brother-in-law said it could be an injector over-dispensing fuel. I loosen the injector one at a time and found the noise went away at cyl 3. Swapped #3 injector with #2 and the noise went to #2. Swapped out with an used injector from a junk yard for $2 and the knocking sound went away. I have been driving it for the last 1 1/2 year and 20K miles.
My worst diagnostic: Same car. Engine will not shut off. Changed out the vacuum pump with a used one from a junk yard again, pain in the butt job. Same problem. Eventually I found out the vacuum line to the climate control is leaking vacuum. Plugged the line and everything fine. I don't bother to replace the vacuum switch. Sold my original vacuum pump on eBay for a slight profit.
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