How about this one:

The Benz is my car; I shell out cash. It maketh me smoke out hybrids: It leadeth me beside busy freeways. It empties my wallet: It leadeth me in the path of torque for long engine life. Yeah, though I drive through the valley of the shadow of rice, I shall fear no evil: For thou art with me. Thy five rods and pistons, they comfort me. Thou preparest a highway before me in the presence of mine enemies. Thou lubricatest my bearings with oil. Surely greasy hands and parts receipts will follow me all the days of my life: And I will drive a Mercedes forever.

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Whoever said there's nothing more expensive than a cheap Mercedes never had a cheap Jaguar.

83 300D Turbo with manual conversion, early W126 vented front rotors and H4 headlights 401,xxx miles
08 Suzuki GSX-R600 M4 Slip-on 26,xxx miles
88 Jaguar XJS V12 94,xxx miles. Work in progress.
99 Mazda Miata 183,xxx miles.