I know that it's been said, but let me reaffirm that statement.

I've had something like this happen to me twice. I wasn't married, but that didn't lessen the pain. The first time, I did much as you were doing; continued to attempt to talk to her, let her know what was going on and how devastated I was, etc, and I think that that did more than anything else to distance her. And distance her it did. I finally gave up after a month and never heard another word from her. I also spent 6 months in a deep depression; very unhealthy (especially since I'm not all that stable emotionally to begin with). That one hurt 'cause it was my first relationship, and we had been very close friends before we tried "getting together"...to this day, I regard that as one of the biggest mistakes I've ever made.

The second time, she didn't actually break up but told me that she didn't think the relationship was going to work out...so I told her that I would give her a week with me completely out of the picture, and had every intention of sticking to it. The next night, she called me in tears saying that she wanted to try to keep things going. She moved up here about a month later, and we've been happy ever since.

Sorry for kinda going off on a tangent, but I hope this helps a little bit. The pain can't truly be described, but you wouldn't be human if you didn't feel it, so don't worry about the "macho wrench forum guys" factor. Seriously, if you feel a need to talk about it, go ahead. There's always people on here willing to listen (okay, "read" ), and letting these emotions bottle up is one of the most dangerous things you can do.

Just remember you aren't alone.