From my local tire store, who in their defense performs great alignment work:

#1 Your oil is black and needs changing. (Did it two days earlier)

#2 Sir could you come outside for a minute? We can't start your car.

__________________
'78 300D 310K Maple Yellow / Bamboo
'87 300D 81K Barolo Red / Safron (RIP @ 113K)
2003 E320 34K Pewter/Charcoal
-------------------------------------