( I sure hope Mr.Carlton doesnt delete this.)

I am living in an apartment now vice a home with a garage and last night at 1 am I thought i could get out and surreptitiously change my oil w/o any of my fellow tenants or the manager noticing.

So I got it drained neatly by shoving a huge piece of cardboard I found in the trash under the car--i found the cardboard in the dumpster...
And I thought " whew that was easy " and so I go and pick up the drain pan with hot oil and start walking up the stairs to my 2 nd floor apartment.

My plan is to take it on the apartment balcony and pour it into a huge bucket I have there...so I go up the stairs and reach my apartment-and suddenly i trip and slip and and about a quart of hot oil spills out and spreads it self over the pressure treated wood stairway and vinyl siding of the apartment stairwell.
The worst thing is the walkway/ landing is made of 2x6's with cracks between each plank in it and the oil starts dripping down to the 1st floor and even the basement apartments through the cracks.
It coats the siding walls.
Now a quart of hot oil has about the coverage of 30 gallons of black paint, and the result is GASP it looks like someone has thrown gallons of black paint everywhere!!!
DONT PANIC RICH IT WILL ONLY TAKE ME 1 HOUR To CLEAN IT UP STAY CALM BOY YOUVE BEEN THROUGH WORSE!

Next I get the great idea to use that NEW Super Hi Tech Cat Litter to soak up the mess. I use my strong KERO Degreaser and then I flush it with--no dont say so--HOT WATER--

I find out that the only problem is when you get that stuff wet, it turns into a plaster or clay like material. That plus a mixture of motor oil and kerosene to thin the oil--so now I have a plaster coating of cat litter, oil and keresone degreaser all over the place--some 30 sq feet of it!! And its slippery and I roll and slip and fall in it twice

So I had to get 5 rolls of Tissue Paper and literally scoop the vomit like material up --it filled a huge box.

By now it is like 3:30 AM. This is really crazy and I am getting tired..
However, I know if I dont do a good job, at least 9 tenants will wake up and slip and slide and track this stuff to their cars and i will get charghed MEGABUCKS---
TO BE CONTINUED---