Quick, call Mark Burnnet . . .

Sperm race TV show launched in Germany

A new reality TV show has been launched in Germany to find the man with the fastest sperm. The sperm will be attracted to the finishing line by a chemical lure identical to that emitted by the female egg in the womb.

The aim is to find Germany’s most virile man in a new reality show being dubbed Sperm Race.

Twelve men, including two celebrities and a ‘health freak’, will take part in the show set to be aired later this year. The show will follow the contestants as they make donations at a sperm bank. The frozen sperm will then be transported to the studio in Cologne. Borris Brandt, 43, head of production company Endemol in Germany, rejected protests that the show was unethical, saying no human eggs would be fertilised. “The main prize in the competition is a Porsche, not a baby. It’s actually a very scientific programme and the topic of fertility is massive in Germany at the moment,” he said.

I'm signing up. My sperm are so fast, I blasted my girl friend out the window and down the block. I'm cocked and loaded...

Been playing that Modern Jizz Quartet record again,eh?

__________________

Yeah, be careful.

You can hit someone in the eye.

__________________
Paul S.

2001 E430, Bourdeaux Red, Oyster interior.
79,200 miles.

1973 280SE 4.5, 170,000 miles. 568 Signal Red, Black MB Tex. "The Red Baron".

No joke, happened to a chap I knew. Got a job on a fishing boat as the assistant baiter,he later rose to master............

__________________

And the prize is a Porsche? I thought that meant you had a small... (Not a personal reference, of course )

John

__________________
04 C230K Sedan
01 Boxster

00 C230K Sedan (sold)
87 420SEL "Phatryd" (sold)

I'll keep that in mind, in light of my current situation.

Since the birth of our twins 16 months ago, I feel like I married to a nun.

I'm getting none in the morning and none in the evening.

__________________
Paul S.

2001 E430, Bourdeaux Red, Oyster interior.
79,200 miles.

1973 280SE 4.5, 170,000 miles. 568 Signal Red, Black MB Tex. "The Red Baron".

I thought they gave up on that whole "master race" thing years ago

__________________
past MB rides:
'68 220D
'68 220D(another one)
'67 230
'84 SD
Current rides:
'06 Lexus RX330
'93 Ford F-250
'96 Corvette
'99 Polaris 700 RMK sled
2011 Polaris Assault
'86 Yamaha TT350(good 'ol thumper)

But it's true! We make the best cars on the planet, we're genius's, and we're hung like horses!

Ahh, yess, the 3 stages of man,to wit: 20-35,tri-weekly.35-50 try weekly.50-65 try weakly.

__________________

So, how long before a losing contestant claims that his sperm weren't given enough time to defrost and limber up before the race?

Or am I thinking too hard about this...

__________________

Current:
2014 VW Tiguan SEL 4Motion 43,000 miles.

2016 Hyundai Santa Fe Sport (wife's).

Past:
2006 Jetta TDI 135,970 miles. Sold Nov. '13.
1995 E-320 Special Edition. 220,200 miles. Sold Sept. '07.
1987 190-E 16 valve. 153,000 miles. Sold Feb. '06.
1980 300-D 225,000 miles. Donated to the National Kidney Foundation.
1980 240-D manual, 297,500 miles. Totaled by inattentive driver.

rickg: "I thought they gave up on that whole 'master race' thing years ago."

It's funny you say that because that was one of the first things I thought about when I read that "the topic of fertility is massive in Germany at the moment." Does anyone know why fertility is such a hot topic in Germany right now?

__________________
headrivenoise... listen.