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Miserable Puns Thread
The postal workers were lamenting the loss of a female co-worker. At her wake, they letter RIP.
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What did the Ram say as he fell off the cliff?
"Dammit,I didn't see that Ewe turn"............ |
Remember the 60's?... burrning the bra was a big flop.
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Confucius say "many men smoke but a Fu Manchu".........
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I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.
Then I got a job as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe. |
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who couldn't keep her pupils under control?
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Quote:
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Oh dear god, is there no end to you guys' shame??? :eek: :D :eek:
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That broad was so shy she closed the blinds every time she changed her mind.
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A man once entered a pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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This one's for you Randy.
Did you hear that NASA recently put a bunch of Holsteins into low earth orbit? They called it the herd shot 'round the world.
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In Merrie Olde England they say:What comes steaming out of Cowes?
The Queen's yacht............. |
Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself?
There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They crashed into each other. At last report, the survivors were marooned. |
Then there was the cabinetmaker who committed suicide by drinking linseed oil and shellack..
He had a miserable life but a fine finish. |
"Hey" said the horny kid working in the pet store to a comely maiden,"you ever hold a macaw?" "No"she replied.
"Well,I bet you kissed a cockatoo"he rejoined. |
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