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  #1  
Old 01-03-2022, 09:14 AM
vwnate1's Avatar
Diesel Dandy
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Sunny So. Cal. !
Posts: 7,811
Talking 'Snow Person'


>>>
>> Humour
>>>
>>>
>>> 
>>> Last night it snowed.
>>> 8:00 am: I made a snowman.
>>> 8:10 - My feminist neighbour asked me why I had not made a snow woman.
>>> 8:15 – I gave my snowman a sex change.
>>> 8:17 - My feminist neighbour then complained about my snow woman's large bosom saying that it objectified women everywhere.
>>> 8:20 - The lesbian couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and said that I should have made two snow women, so I made my snow woman a partner.
>>> 8:22 - The transgender man/women/person asked why I didn't just make one snow individual with detachable parts.
>>> 8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot noses, as vegetables are food and not to be wasted to decorate snow figures.
>>> 8:28 – Black Lives Matter turned up and called me a racist because the snow couple were both white.
>>> 8:30 - I used food colouring to make one of the snow couple a different colour to be more racially inclusive.
>>> 8:37 – I was then accused of the even worse offense of applying black-face to a white individual.
>>> 8:39 - The Middle Eastern gent across the road demanded the snow women be dressed in burkas for the sake of their modesty.
>>> 8:40 - The police arrived and read out the list of complaints that had been made against me.
>>> 8:42 - The feminist neighbour returned to complain that the broom that the snow woman was holding should be removed because it depicted women in a purely domestic role.
>>> 8:43 - The local council Equality Officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.
>>> 8:45 – A TV news crew from the BBC showed up. I was asked if I knew the difference between snowmen and snow women. Jokingly, I replied, "Snowballs". The female news reporter denounced me as a sexist pig.
>>> 9:00 - I was on the TV news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, and sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
>>> 9:10 – The police asked if I had any accomplices. My children were then taken into care by Social Services.
>>> 9:29 – Far-left protesters, offended by everything I’d done, marched down the street demanding my arrest for hate crimes.
>>> 9:45 – By now the story was all over social media. My boss called and fired me because of the negative association with his company.
>>> 10:00 - I cried into my drink because all I wanted to do was build a bloody snowman
>>> Don't Laugh This is what the world is coming to....
>>
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1982 240D 408,XXX miles
Ignorance is the mother of suspicion and fear is the father

I did then what I knew how to do ~ now that I know better I do better
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  #2  
Old 01-03-2022, 01:15 PM
INSIDIOUS's Avatar
Not suffering fools today
 
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Good thing you didn't have blood all over it
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  #3  
Old 01-03-2022, 06:22 PM
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Tony
 
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Location: Bandon, Oregon
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I have noticed the question for sex on forms etc now says "Sex given at birth"
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W111 280SE 3.5 Coupe
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Past cars:
Porsche 914 2.0
'64 Jaguar XKE Roadster
'57 Oval Window VW
'71 Toyota Hilux Pickup Truck-Dad bought new
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  #4  
Old 01-03-2022, 07:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tony H View Post
I have noticed the question for sex on forms etc now says "Sex given at birth"
Save yourself the grief, just answer: I was too young at the time to remember but dayum that nurse with the big milk bags looked yummy to me then
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  #5  
Old 01-03-2022, 08:56 PM
vwnate1's Avatar
Diesel Dandy
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Sunny So. Cal. !
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Post Well ;

There's a very mean thing one can do to females that have stuffed animal toys, it involves a red permanent marker but it WILL get you fired and sometimes prosecuted .
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-Nate
1982 240D 408,XXX miles
Ignorance is the mother of suspicion and fear is the father

I did then what I knew how to do ~ now that I know better I do better
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  #6  
Old 01-04-2022, 12:17 AM
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Me, Myself, and I
 
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Location: Redwood City, CA
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Well ... you should have provided a safe space right near by for people to get over their trauma at all they had been FORCED TO LOOK AT!
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1986 300SDL, 362K
1984 300D, 138K

Last edited by cmac2012; 01-04-2022 at 02:40 AM.
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  #7  
Old 01-04-2022, 12:21 AM
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Me, Myself, and I
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Redwood City, CA
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Years ago I worked in a shop, one of the guys name was John Spearman. We were a social bunch and hung out now and then. His girlfriend was a college girl, I mean woman, early 20s, this was in '75 FWIW, oh man, she was a flaming women's libber, I don't think they called it feminism just yet. This lady would be happy to give out earfuls free of charge on any number of topics.

One day we were leaving lunch, and my buddy Alex said "hey John, is it true that Linda won't marry you unless you change your name to Spearperson?"
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1986 300SDL, 362K
1984 300D, 138K
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  #8  
Old 01-04-2022, 01:33 AM
vwnate1's Avatar
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Location: Sunny So. Cal. !
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Smile Humor

Glad to see you get it many don't because being butthurt 24/7 is far more important you know ? .
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-Nate
1982 240D 408,XXX miles
Ignorance is the mother of suspicion and fear is the father

I did then what I knew how to do ~ now that I know better I do better
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  #9  
Old 01-04-2022, 02:39 AM
cmac2012's Avatar
Me, Myself, and I
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Redwood City, CA
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OMG, there’s a lot of that going around all right.
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Te futueo et caballum tuum

1986 300SDL, 362K
1984 300D, 138K
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  #10  
Old 01-05-2022, 10:40 AM
vwnate1's Avatar
Diesel Dandy
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Sunny So. Cal. !
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Unhappy Sad But True

Somehow it's become a okay thing to be a professional victim .

I don't get this .
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-Nate
1982 240D 408,XXX miles
Ignorance is the mother of suspicion and fear is the father

I did then what I knew how to do ~ now that I know better I do better
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  #11  
Old 01-06-2022, 02:23 PM
'bfest refugee
 
Join Date: Oct 2018
Posts: 5,084
Funny stuff, I'll add just 1 unfunny comment.

Keep in mind that 999/1,000 people would look at the snowman and say "cool".

Don't let that 1 person ruin your day or make you think poorly of the other 999.
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  #12  
Old 01-06-2022, 06:28 PM
vwnate1's Avatar
Diesel Dandy
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Sunny So. Cal. !
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Post Humour

Thank you Sir .

I have no real issue with those who fail to see the humour, I -do- have issue with those who choose to try and tell others what's funny and cancel me .

Everyone's collective opinion is what I want here, I may be wrong , may not .
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-Nate
1982 240D 408,XXX miles
Ignorance is the mother of suspicion and fear is the father

I did then what I knew how to do ~ now that I know better I do better
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