Cop pulled a guy over and said, "I clocked you
at 80 miles per hour back there".

The guy replies, "Couldn't have officer,,, I had my cruise control set at 60."

His wife sitting beside him knitting says sweetly, "Now dear,,, you know the car doesn't have cruise control."

As the cop is writing the ticket out, the wife says, "IT's a good thing your radar detector went off, or it would have been worse."

"Would you please shut up ?" said the husband.

As the cop was writing the ticket for the illegal radar detector, he said to the man, " I am also going to give you a ticket for not wearing a seat belt."

The guy pleads,,,, "I just took it off to get my wallet out officer."

"Now, now dear,,, said the wife,,, You know you never wear a seat belt when you're driving."

"WOULD YOU PLEASE JUST SHUT UP?" said the man.

The polieman looked at the woman, and asked, "Does he always talk to you that way?"

WAIT FOR IT,,,, WAIT FOR IT,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

















"Only when he's drinking, officer".

__________________
95 SL500 Smoke Silver, Parchment 64K
07 E350 4matic Station Wagon White 34K
02 E320 4Matic Silver/grey 80K
05 F150 Silver 44K

Oh Yeah!

__________________
dtf
1994 E320 Wagon (Died @ 308,669 miles)
1995 E300 Diesel (228,000)
1999 E300 Turbodiesel ( died @ 255,000)
2006 Toyota Tundra SR5 AC 4X4 (115,000 miles) rusted frame - sold to chop shop
2011 Audi A4 Avant (165,000 miles) Seized engine - donated to Salvation Army
BMW 330 xi 6 speed manual (175,034 miles)
2014 E350 4Matic Wagon 128,000 miles
2018 Dodge Ram 21,000 miles

Question: "Your breath smells a little like beer, son. You sure you ain't been drinking?"

Response: "Your eyes look a little glazed, officer. You been eating doughnuts?"