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#1
04-23-2006, 10:28 PM
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How about some funny Jokes
I could never tell a good joke so I won't, but I know all you jokers out their must have some real good ones.
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#2
04-23-2006, 11:22 PM
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#1
A grasshopper walks in a bar. The bartender says, "We've got a drink named after you!" The grasshopper says, "You've got a drink named Steve?" #2 A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"
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Whoever said there's nothing more expensive than a cheap Mercedes never had a cheap Jaguar. 83 300D Turbo with manual conversion, early W126 vented front rotors and H4 headlights 401,xxx miles 08 Suzuki GSX-R600 M4 Slip-on 26,xxx miles 88 Jaguar XJS V12 94,xxx miles. Work in progress. 99 Mazda Miata 183,xxx miles.
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#4
04-23-2006, 11:39 PM
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There was a farmer who had two sons. He wanted to make sure they could make the most with what they had. So he gave each one of them a duck, and told them to go to town and get whatever they could for it.
The older son went to town first. He took his duck to a Chinese restaurant and sold it for ten dollars. He went home and told his father what he did. The farmer said, "You did good son." The younger son went to town. He took his duck to a prostitute. After they did the deed, the prostitute said, "That was pretty good. If you do it with me again, I'll give you your duck back." They did it again. A while later, the younger son was carrying the duck under his arm when it got loose and ran into the street. A truck ran it over. The truck driver was mortified. He offered $50 to the man if he would keep quiet about the incident. The farmer's son agreed. When he got home, the farmer asked, "How did you do?" The son replied, "I got a f--k for a duck, a duck for a f--k, and fifty dollars for a f--ked up duck."
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Whoever said there's nothing more expensive than a cheap Mercedes never had a cheap Jaguar. 83 300D Turbo with manual conversion, early W126 vented front rotors and H4 headlights 401,xxx miles 08 Suzuki GSX-R600 M4 Slip-on 26,xxx miles 88 Jaguar XJS V12 94,xxx miles. Work in progress. 99 Mazda Miata 183,xxx miles.
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#5
04-23-2006, 11:45 PM
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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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62 220sb 67 250S 72 280SE 4.5 74 280C 77 300D 82 240D 85 190E 2.3 86 300E RIP 12/28/09 85 300SD 92 300D 2.5 00 E320 Current Over 1,000,000 miles in Benzes, Since66 ....and a whole passel of BMW 2002 and Tii
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#6
04-24-2006, 03:02 PM
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What's green and smells like Miss Piggy?
Kermits finger... 
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#7
04-24-2006, 03:12 PM
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How many . . .
How many Halliburton employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Wait, is this a fixed price or a cost plus contract?
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" We have nothing to fear but the main stream media itself . . . ."- Adapted from Franklin D Roosevelt for the 21st century  OBK #55 1998 Lincoln Continental - Sold Max 1984 300TD 285,000 miles - Sold The Dee8gonator 1987 560SEC 196,000 miles - Sold Orgasmatron - 2006 CLS500 90,000 miles 2002 C320 Wagon 122,000 miles 2016 AMG GTS 12,000 miles
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#8
04-24-2006, 03:47 PM
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Your mom is so fat that i needed a CDL to ride her
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#9
04-24-2006, 04:09 PM
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There's a long line at the Gates of Heaven and St. Peter is asking everyone a question to see if they pass or fail (if they fail they go to he--).
St. Peter says to the first guy "How do you spell love?" First Guy: "L-O-V-E" St. Peter: "O.k. go right on in." Second Guy: O.K. what do i have to do to get in? St. Peter: Oh it's really easy you just have to spell the word LOVE. Second Guy: Oh that's easy- L-O-V-E. St. Peter:' Hey I have to use the rest room can you take over here for a few minutes? Second Guy:"Oh sure no problem." The next person in line is this guys ex-wife, he can't believe it motherload! Second Guy: "What happened?" Ex Wife:" Oh I got hit by a bus!" Second Guy:" Oh that's just awful." Ex Wife:" What do I have to do to get in?" Second Guy:" OH it's easy, just spell a word!" Ex-Wife:" Well what's the word?" Second Guy:"Czechoslovakia"
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#11
04-24-2006, 05:30 PM
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Did you hear that Mickey and Minnie Mouse are getting divorced?
Mickey found out that she was f------ Goofey.
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#12
04-24-2006, 05:49 PM
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good god, most of the air conditioning posts are funnier than this!
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#13
04-24-2006, 05:52 PM
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Kitchenrat- I don't see you adding anything Mr. Funny....
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#14
04-24-2006, 05:57 PM
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on the other hand, what kind of humour would you expect from a bunch of guys scurrying around in alleys behind chinese restaurants begging for pork fat to put in their fuel tanks? by the way gumbie, there's humour in both of these posts.
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#15
04-24-2006, 06:02 PM
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Kitchenrat- There is humor in almost anything, I am jewish and can't use pork products it's a tribal infraction.
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