Thought we could use a little comic relief. I used to LOVE Stephen Wright.... Feel free to add your own.

Mike

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Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered "assassinated" instead of just murdered?

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

Why are there 10 hot dogs per package, but only 8 buns per package?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny" for your thoughts"? Why am I being shorted a penny?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck for all eternity wearing the clothes you were buried in?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

Why do we drive on parkways, and park on driveways?

Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?

If I spill Spot remover on my dog, will he disappear?

What did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a
good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people happily say that they "slept like a baby" when babies usually wake up every two hours?

Why do people say "I'm going to run to the store", when they know damned well they are really going to drive there?

If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?

Why do people pay to go up into tall buildings, and then put money in the giant binoculars to look at things on the ground? Couldn't they see the things on the ground from the ground?

Why do we choose from only two people for President, yet there's fifty choices for Miss America?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway, right?

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1979 300 SD
350,000 miles
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1982 300D-gone---sold to a buddy
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1985 300TD
270,000 miles
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1994 E320
not my favorite, but the wife wanted it

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