I have waited tables since the beginning of time, (although I no longer do now). I have seen it all. I have so many great stories I am considering writing a book with my wife. She has some great ones too.

When I first started back I worked at dumpy places the first two years. The work was hard, tip percentage was lower. As I got older, I worked in nicer places, finally working in some of the finest restaurants in town. Tips are much different then, and people are usually nicer. Contrary to how nice places are perceived, i.e. stuffy guests that are tight with the money.

I do not know where you work now, but I made much more money reading and learning about wine (big money there) and knowing every single detail about anything in the place when I came to work. That is what makes money. If you are working in a place that has a 75-100 per person check average, you could be hitting sales of 2000 and up a night easy. Do the math, it adds up. The only way to do that is know wine and really give good (unobtrusive) service.

I constantly see waiters complain about poor tips that are sucky waiters. LOL. I am certainly not saying that you are, but many servers don't look at their own habits. Some waiters expect everything to be 20% and they are never even on the floor. The think just showing up and taking the order entitles them a good tip. Wrong. Again also , the lower the restaurant, the more abuse you endure and less money too.

As for me, I used to tip crazy no matter what because I thought it was a 'union due'. LOL. Now I am not so forgiving of lousy or rude service. I'm easy though. When I go out to eat, I am never in a hurry. I do not care how long the food takes. In fact, I'd prefer it to come out slow. However, keep my drink full, don't leave dirty dishes all over my table, and don't rush me. It's not rocket science. If I get that, I give at least 20%. I like giving great tips sometimes too especially if the waiter/waitress has a special quality about them. I know what it's like to get an awesome tip. I have gotten some zingers that blew my mind and made my week! Haha My wife has me beat in the best tip department though. She works at an upscale steakhouse and on a bill of 3k, she got a 1k tip. Not too shabby.

Some people hated waiting tables through college. Others I know have masters and still work 30 hrs a week in nice places because they simply make more money. If bad tips drive you crazy try to look at the money on a monthly or weekly basis instead, look at where you are working, or honestly look at the service you are giving.

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1994 C 280 117.5k, White (Good as new)
1997 Toyota Camry 149k Miles (Not so pretty anymore)

1990 190e 2.6 95k (Sold-Should not have)
1981 240d Stick ??? Miles...sold

The traditional tipping rules dictated that the tip was on the meal and not the tax or the alcohol. The sommilier got a separate tip after the wine was accepted by the dining party. Under those older rules a 20-25% tip may have made sense.

In states with high sales tax (WA is one an our rate is about 9%) the bill can get distorted to some degree. A $100 dinner tab and 20% tip is alot different that a $100 dinner, $30 in drinks and 9% sales tax. The $20/20% meal tip is now 14% of the total bill.

Asking that is the rudest thing to do IMO. Too rude.

Dishonest waiters often add grat and find a way to hide it too, to get the double 'bump' or extra grat. Never just hand a waiter your credit card and have him/her bring the charge slip to you. You could have grat added on and not even know it. Many places are aware of this and make sure it shows on the credit card slip as a charge, and then you would have room for extra tip, or just total the thing out. Some places do not though, and it will just be included in the total and then there will still be an empty line that says "tip". You'll never know you tipped twice because you just get the total charge from the merchant.

Also if a waiter circles the total with a marker (especially on big party checks- 10 or more people etc) make sure it isn't crossing out the added grat part. I've seen waiters circle the total just to block out the added grat. People just see the total on the bottom.

It's a few bad apples, but it happens. So look at your checks, don't just hand them the CC, and don't let your waiter rush you.

__________________
1994 C 280 117.5k, White (Good as new)
1997 Toyota Camry 149k Miles (Not so pretty anymore)

1990 190e 2.6 95k (Sold-Should not have)
1981 240d Stick ??? Miles...sold

[QUOTE]Originally posted by KyGuy
[B]The traditional tipping rules dictated that the tip was on the meal and not the tax or the alcohol. The sommilier got a separate tip after the wine was accepted by the dining party. Under those older rules a 20-25% tip may have made sense.

QUOTE]

Often times now, the waiter tips the sommelier out at the end of the night. Sommeliers are given a salary or a percentage of what they sell and then the tip out from the severs. At least where I have worked.

__________________
1994 C 280 117.5k, White (Good as new)
1997 Toyota Camry 149k Miles (Not so pretty anymore)

1990 190e 2.6 95k (Sold-Should not have)
1981 240d Stick ??? Miles...sold

Jason-
Yes, that's been my experience as well. This was "old school" stuff my granny taught me when I was coming up. Been a while and it's historical kind of Ritz dinning room stuff referenced earlier.

I like old school better anyway. I Love going to those places that are stuck in time and the waiters are all 100 yrs old and wearing jackets. Lots of fun.

__________________
1994 C 280 117.5k, White (Good as new)
1997 Toyota Camry 149k Miles (Not so pretty anymore)

1990 190e 2.6 95k (Sold-Should not have)
1981 240d Stick ??? Miles...sold

I've been bartending for just over two years, and these are my thoughts;

Originally posted by Kuan...

1) You leave my dirty utensils on the table after each course
2) I have to pour my own wine
3) There are crumbs all over my table
4) The server wanting to get to know me
5) Empty water glasses
6) Servers who know nothing about the food they serve
7) Servers who don't check back at your table almost immediately after you take the first bite
8) Excuses, made up ones or otherwise
9) Dirty uniforms
10) Improper sanitation habits

Absolutely nothing on this list is unreasonable, and is reasonable to expect in a decent place. These are the things that should really be affecting the gratuity. I've tried to pick a few elements out of the list that should have some priority, but I failed. I do think a servers attempt at getting to know you is more forgivable, it just depends on the kind of place. I'll address this in a second.

This is often true. Many big tippers do so because they don't feel they deserve good service without paying for it. On the other hand, being good at service is like being good at anything else involving close contact with customers, like a barber or whatever else. Many people come to a bar or a restaraunt to have their backs scratched in very particular ways, to have a certain kind of "experience".
I wait on many industry people, they come to where I work because they know they can rely on it and it makes them feel great. They and others pay for it in part because they appreciate it and feel great, but also because a highly paid waitstaff should, at least in theory, be a highly skilled and competent one. The tips raise the job-rent, and help to insure quality service consistently. I'm open to being wrong on this point, but I think its true.

I agree, only if the problem was gross and could not be resolved. I have left places before, but only because the service was so bad I found it to be more institutional than due to the fault of the server. Things like cold food for everyone I'm with, looking around wondering if anyone actually works there, bad attitude of the staff, etc. If the server sucks, usually speaking with a manager has favorable results. If the manager sucks, I never look back. They'll close soon anyway.

Absolutely. A server not bringing change back to the table, or returning it to the bar is wrong. It just shouldn't be done. I triend to train a new bartender at work and this point consistently evaded her. Even if someone pays a $10.25 tab and gives you $14.00, you return $3.75. It isn't yours until they leave the bar. Its rude and presumptuous to do otherwise, and people are drinking and often make mistakes, leaving too much cash. I took a tip of $80 once on a $20 tab, and they paid in twenties. I kept it in my pocket, and sure enough they came back to the bar after a few hours wondering where their money went. I gave it back to them, of course.

Getting back to being friendly as mentioned before:
I learned to wait tables in Chicago during undergrad, where "Russian service" still has some meaning. I came to Kansas City never planning to do it again. After I started bartending (which I had never done before), I actually had complaints because I seemed stand-offish and snooty, and this is at a solid place. A server trying to get to know you may just be someone trying to introiduce you to the place, or trying to find a way to serve you better. There is no excuse for being obnoxious or "TGIFridays stupid", but friendliness has its advantages.

When I get up to leave I scan the nearby tables for tips and scoop - up the loose bills as I go by on my way out. You gotta be bold and keep moving. Pays for gas.

Botnst

My friend Pete and I were usually to broke in my late teens or early twenties to go out "all the time", so when our funds were low, we would stand in front of certain clubs and pretend to be doormen/bouncers and say " There's a 10.00 cover charge" and get away with it pretty often, usually about 3-5 people and then split and go elsewhere.

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Enough about me, how are you doing?

Come to think of it, Pete and i were pretty bold. We would often go up to a bar and look around and see who was preoccupied/dancing/drunk enough to not watch their beers and swipe'em. How would they know?

Peter was real bad, he had an innocent baby face and would generally get away with anything. He often left with more money than he came in with, swiping tips off the bar.

Not braggin' just reminiscing days gone bye-bye. Foolish kids....

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Enough about me, how are you doing?

I agree with you on most of these points, especially the reasons why you wouldn't tip good. However, i'm willing to bet you wouldn't go out of your way and tell your server he/she did a great job and THEN leave 7 on a 65. The other thing that people have to realize, is that servers make absolutely no money other than the tips they make. We are basically independant contracters that use us as a means to sell food to their customers. I think my last paycheck was 25 dollars after all the taxes were taken out. Just something to consider,
Ryan

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83 300SD.......sold
96 integra SE....sold
99 a4 quattro....sold
2001 IS300.......sold
2002 330i.........current.
2004 highlander limited....current.

I tip 20% if good, and less if poor.

I used to work in a restaurant, so I know how it is. If a waiter's late with something and I can tell it isn't their fault, I don't skimp on the tip. The tip's really based on the quality of the service (how hard they tried) and less about the food.

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Current:
2014 VW Tiguan SEL 4Motion 43,000 miles.

2016 Hyundai Santa Fe Sport (wife's).

Past:
2006 Jetta TDI 135,970 miles. Sold Nov. '13.
1995 E-320 Special Edition. 220,200 miles. Sold Sept. '07.
1987 190-E 16 valve. 153,000 miles. Sold Feb. '06.
1980 300-D 225,000 miles. Donated to the National Kidney Foundation.
1980 240-D manual, 297,500 miles. Totaled by inattentive driver.