Hell, I'm bred and born in Wisconsin! Do cows fart?

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M. G. Burg
'10 - Dakota SXT - Daily Ride / ≈ 172.5K
.'76 - 450SLC - 107.024.12 / < .89.20 K
..'77 - 280E - 123.033.12 / > 128.20 K
...'67 - El Camino - 283ci / > 207.00 K
....'75 - Yamaha - 650XS / < 21.00 K
.....'87 - G20 Sportvan / > 206.00 K
......'85 - 4WINNS 160 I.O. / 140hp
.......'74 - Honda CT70 / Real 125
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“I didn’t really say everything I said.”
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ~ Yogi Berra ~

No offense, but it seems to me you're being a bit naive about this situation....

I'm almost 40, and when I was a teenager such "friendly arrangements" were not at all uncommon. We were teenagers, with the hormones and urges that ALL teenagers have... things ARE going to happen. It's inevitable.

Not something you want to think of your teenage daughter as being involved in (my daughter is almost 16, has a boyfriend, and I don't relish the thought either), but... We are all human, and so are they.

Teenagers ARE going to have sex. It's just a fact of life, always has been. It's just more out in the open now, more talked-about.

Just have the "talk"... try to teach them to be safe, sensible, to think before acting... and hope they listen. The "abstinence only" approach is almost invariably a waste of time.

Mike

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1979 300 SD
350,000 miles
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1982 300D-gone---sold to a buddy
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1985 300TD
270,000 miles
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1994 E320
not my favorite, but the wife wanted it

www.myspace.com/mikemover
www.myspace.com/openskystudio
www.myspace.com/speedxband
www.myspace.com/openskyseparators
www.myspace.com/doubledrivemusic

Here's another way to look at the parent-child bond.

If you spent 6-8 years of your life 24/7 doing that which you loved it would give you a certain perspective. That dependency relationship for an adult human being is near absolute.

(In less charitable terms, it's a parasitic relationship, in which the parasitism starts as internal and total. But gradually, over more than a decade slowly evolves to a consensual dependency rather than parasitic.)

So now the adult's child approaches independence. But the parent is usually much slower (kids say, "retarded") in that evolution than the child. The parent still has an emotional drive to protect the young adult as though the young adult were still a toddler.

So the parent reacts to an outside interest as a threat. In a way, it is a threat. The parent sees the child behaving normally until the outside interest invades then the kid acts "abnormally". I use parentheses because we all, even old farts, remember the wackiness of young love -- it is a normal passage. But it is extraordinary as far as the parent is concerned. So the parent goes into protective mode. That too is normal and natural. It takes parents a while to adjust to the emerging adult, too.

I am more intrigued by the different ways that males and females look at casual sex.

As we evolve from a culture largely shaped by reproductive sex to a culture of recreational sex we are all desperately looking for the rules. I don't mean laws, I mean morals. The old sexual morals were useful when sex led to children. they are anachronistic when sex is just for fun but by choice, for reproduction. As a culture we are all over the place trying to figure out what should and should not be normative.

SWMBOs benefit is that I'm the one to feed the cows in cold weather.

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Never a dull moment at Berry Hill Farm.